Damn. I can't go into my house.

[Redstone]

Mrs R just opened a can of lobster meat in the kitchen.

I'm stuck on the screen porch until the smell goes away.

Lucky it's cool and the windows are open. Shouldn't be more than half an hour or so.

Redstone

[miss_american_pie]

1. So you're sitting on the porch while she cooks?

:D

[Redstone]

12. I'm hideously allergic to shellfish. So, as a defense mechism, my body

makes sure I detest the smell of shellfish.

Lobster isn't as bad as shrimp or crab, but whenever any of it is cooking in the house, I can't be in there.

Redstone

[IntravenousDemilo]

43. Hey, make sure you stay on her good side.

Just sayin'...

;)

[Midlodemocrat]

2. I'll trade places with you.

I'm trying to get up the nerve to go to the ER to have my toe lanced.

Not doing very well.

[Droopy]

3. I almost had to do that to my ass recently

Luckily things sort of took care of themselves along with some help from some antibiotics. The doctor's visit was embarassing, though. I wish you good health and a speedy recovery.

[Midlodemocrat]

4. I'm so embarrassed about this. I dropped the kitchen garbage can

on my right big toe on Sunday and a hematoma formed under the nail.

The pain is excrutiating, and I feel like a major wimp but according to my doctor friend, it won't go away unless they pierce the nail to drain the blood.

The whole thought of it makes me sick to my stomach, so I'm posting on DU trying to get up the guts to go and get it done.

[Droopy]

6. Tell them you need drugs

They got some stuff that will make you forget your name as well as your brain's response to the messed up toe. Just be sure you have someone that can drive you home.

[trof]

7. "Home" remedy:

I hammered a fingernail.
It turned black and was EXCRUCIATING!
My friend Arthur came by.
He's a doctor.
"Let me fix that."
"No no no...it's OK. I don't want to mess with it."
"trof...do you trust me?"
"Oh hell, Arthur, that's not fair. You're my best friend, of course I trust you."
"OK, let me fix it. It won't hurt. I promise."

jeez

He straightened a paper clip. Holding one end with a dishcloth, he held the other end over my cigarette lighter until it was red hot. He poked it into my fingernail and as soon as it burnt through the nail...
INSTANT RELIEF!!! And it didn't hurt a bit!

Alternative: Elecrtic drill with a very small bit. Drill slowly into the affected nail.
Not for the faint of heart, but it works.

[Blue Diadem]

9. I'm in pain just reading that..

but I know it provides instant relief.

[Midlodemocrat]

10. Believe it or not, some doctors still use the paper clip remedy.

I'm just hoping for some serious drugs.

[evlbstrd]

15. I've done that.

No drugs required.

[texas1928]

45. I use my pocket Knife and just drill into the nail with the point.

Works everytime.

[Redstone]

11. You're NOT being a weenie! That REALLY fucking hurts.

But you gotta do it anyway.

See if you can score some Vikes, at least. Make something good come out of the procedure.

Redstone

[bicentennial_baby]

18. DIY!

That's what I do with yucky stuff like that...Sterilize needle, poke, and drain...Have hubby do it fo ryou, if you can't

:hug:

[Redstone]

21. The reason I keep scalpel blades in the house...DIY.

Redstone

[bicentennial_baby]

41. Same here...

If I think I or someone in my houeshold is capable (my Mom and Grandma and Aunt are nurses), I'll do it myself, period. :)

[havocmom]

38. I did it myself after and ER doctor botched the job

Had the good sense to put pillows down and get on my knees before drilling. Didn't want to hurt my head on satillo tile floor if I passed out.

It was the night from hell. Doc botching the job & having to do it myself was the good part of that evening's entertainment.

My regular doctor explained thumbs and big toes have the most nerves in relation to tissue of all our parts.

Swell... what can I do to get the gasoline smell outta my jeans (from the leaky tank in the cab that soaked the back seat?) Did I mention it was a BAD NIGHT?

[SammyWinstonJack]

37. Ouch! I doubt I could handle that. I probably wouldn't go at all.

[Rhiannon12866]

46. Get it done. Doctors have seen everything, I promise you.

The point is, you want it done right so you won't end up with a worse problem. Please say you'll do it...:-(

I once was having a problem with the nail on my big toe. My GP sent me to a podiatrist and I was afraid that it was those little toenail gremlins, so I was embarrassed, but I finally faced up to it. The doctor was extremely nice, said I must have injured it at some point and he just removed it. Right there. With no warning. With no anesthetic. If I could do that, you can do this. I'm fine now. And you will be too.:-)

Rhiannon:hug:

[graywarrior]

5. Do your gums swell up around lobster, or what?

Share with us.

[Redstone]

13. See #12 upthread. Everything swells, then I die.

Redstone

[graywarrior]

22. You must be related to my sister....who is married to a lobster

fisherman in Nova Scotia....bwaahahahahahahahahahaha.

[Redstone]

23. Oh, the poor thing. Seriously. I do not envy her.

Redstone

[graywarrior]

24. I know. I've seen the results, it ain't pretty.

Poor thing has to make creamed lobster every xmas.

[Redstone]

26. Christ, I'd need seven refills for the EpiPen. And use them all

in just one day.

Redstone

[graywarrior]

29. I think she prays to Jesus.

[Redstone]

30. And I hope He helps her. Being married to a Lobsta Man must be

a trial in many ways...not to insult the Lobsta Men, but it's a hard life for their wives as well.

Redstone

[graywarrior]

33. Indeed. His boat has gone down twice.

Once he washed up on Newfoundland shores and the second time as he and his crew sat in a raft which sprung a leak, a Russian troller came out of nowhere and picked them up.

[Redstone]

34. Oh, my. Remind me to never go into that line of work, would you?

Redstone

[graywarrior]

35. What, you don't want to come home with fish hooks through your

hand and chase your wife around the kitchen with it?

[RebelOne]

8. Lobster meat?? I'd be salivating. I love lobster.

And by the way, where can you find canned lobster? I haven't seen it on my supermarket shelves.

[Redstone]

14. She got it in Canada. I think it's a Canadian Government subsidy thing,

to give some kind of jobs to the people in Newfoundland / Labrador.

Redstone

[lost-in-nj]

16. Lobster, yuch!!

I can't eat it cause I don't like it....

:puke: :hi:

lost

[Redstone]

20. I can't eat it because I'd die if I did. Really.

Redstone

[lost-in-nj]

25. That is really scary

you read about these kids allergic to peanuts...
I just cannot imagine being that allergic to something

I'm glad you are diligent.

lost

[Redstone]

28. Oh, yes, people make fun of the "peanut-free areas" in schools, but

it's not funny AT ALL to the kids who are allergic.

I've gone to the hospital because a restaurant served me a salad that was supposed to have chicken on it, and had shrimp instead...and they were too cheap to make a new salad, and just took the shrimp off and put chicken on, despite my warning to the waiter.

Food allergies are deadly serious.

Redstone

[Ptah]

17. Here's a pic to welcome you back

[Redstone]

19. Merci, mon frere.

Good to be back.

And I avoided the shitstorm. Threw away the newspaper this morning without reading it (except for the comics). First time in about 30 years I didn't state my day reading a newspaper (except for when on vacation).

Redstone

[Floogeldy]

27. Is it supposed to smell that bad?

:puke:

[Redstone]

31. I suppose it smells good to people who are not allergic to shellfish.

I have a bias in that regard.

Redstone

[Floogeldy]

42. That is most likely an erroneous supposition.

I do not think that the olfactory nerves of an allergic person are more sensitive than those of a non-allergic person.

However, it if stinks DON'T EAT IT. ;)

[Joe Fields]

32. Anything that comes from the ocean never makes it past my front door.

I cannot stand seafood of any kind. Being a flatland midwesterner, I prefer prime Angus beef.

[hfojvt]

36. Favre had the same problem after last Sunday's game

somebody put an endzone in front of his house :hurts:

[In_The_Wind]

39. Perhaps that type of cooking is better left for the days you're away.

BTW ~ Will you and Mrs. Redstone be coming down to NYC on 9/22 to see everyone who's coming to share a drink with MissHoneychurch before she returns home? :loveya:

[Fountain79]

40. They sell lobster meat in cans? n/t

[Floogeldy]

44. Dizackly!

:scared: