Toys 'R' Us Worker Harrassed Breastfeeding Shopper

[matcom]

:popcorn:

<snip>

The New York Civil Liberties Union claims that Toys "R" Us employees harassed a shopper who was breastfeeding her infant this week at the 42nd Street store.

In a letter sent to company headquarters in Wayne, N.J., yesterday, a lawyer with the NYCLU claims the company violated the state's basic civil rights law and demanded a public apology and compensation for the mother.

A lawsuit could follow if the demands are not met, the lawyer, Elisabeth Benjamin, said, in an interview yesterday.

The NYCLU claims that when the mother, Chelsi Meyerson of Brooklyn, began to breastfeed, five different saleswomen confronted her, according to the letter. At least one saleswoman told Ms. Meyerson that breastfeeding on the store floor was "inappropriate" because of all the nearby children, the letter stated.

The NYCLU claims that Ms. Meyerson was told she would have to move to a room on the basement floor of the store if she wanted to continue breastfeeding. One saleswoman went so far as to call over a security guard, according to the letter, which notes that by the time the guard arrived, her infant had finished feeding.

"We can get ready to sue if Toys "R" Us is going to insist that it is appropriate to send women to the basement," Ms. Benjamin said.

In a statement sent via e-mail, a spokeswoman for company disputed the NYCLU's account of the incident and wrote that Toys "R" Us had a "commitment to nursing moms."

The spokeswoman, Lisa Lewin, wrote that nobody ordered Ms. Meyerson around.

"Ms. Meyerson, who was breastfeeding on the selling floor, was in fact, asked by store associates if she would be more comfortable in a private environment," Ms. Lewin wrote. "When she said no, store associates left her to continue breastfeeding without interruption."

Many Toys "R" Us stores — including the 42nd Street one — have private nursing areas, Ms. Lewin wrote.

http://www.nysun.com/pf.php?id=39737&access=254053

[Nye Bevan]

1. I bet this thread gets over 200 replies (nt)

[BlueIris]

28. What, normal folks again outraged by misogynist, anti-child, Puritanical

hypocrisy and posting about it? GODDAMN THEM. For shame, and how worth mocking.

[miss_american_pie]

2. I think you're going to need more popcorn

[Mutley]

3. This from the company that drills

"Mom is our #1 customer!" into its employees' heads.

[underpants]

4. Nancy Grace Says 'Guilt' Likely Made Mother Commit Suicide

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=2448050&page=1

[MiniMandaRuth]

5. She shouldn't have to move. If she feels okay just standing there,

then let her be!

Jeeze.

[In_The_Wind]

6. If I can't eat while wandering around a store why should anyone else.

:shrug: There is a time and place for everything.

[CBGLuthier]

7. because you are an adult

I assume, and can control your needs, again, I assume.

I would rather she fed the child than have to listen to it cry while she shopped.

[In_The_Wind]

18. Actually I had a health condition which required drinking liquids or

coughing continually. I was causing myself physical damage if I wasn't keeping my throat wet. My doctors couldn't help me with prescriptions. The only option I had was to leave my drink outside in the trash or stay out of stores that wouldn't allow me to bring my drink with me.

[CBGLuthier]

21. OK, but

As an adult you still were in charge of what you were doing. You could decide what to do.

It appears you want to win this "argument" at all costs, so I concede. Have a nice day.

[LeftyMom]

8. Because you don't eat for 20 minutes every two hours or

have a stomach the size of a newborn's fist? :shrug:

Here's how to figure out where nursing is appropriate:

1. Are mother and child allowed to be there? If so, then yes.

2. Would bottle feeding be acceptable in the same place? If so, then yes.

[July]

9. Wonderful response, LeftyMom.

I salute you.

[In_The_Wind]

12. Mothers can and should feed their children as often as necessary but

some women haven't figured out how to do so without exposing themselves.

BTW I haven't noticed mothers feeding a bottle to their babies while shopping maybe they do. :shrug:

[LeftyMom]

13. All the time

Usually it's with the kid in the stroller as soon as they can hold it themselves, sometimes sooner if Mom is a bottle-propper.

[In_The_Wind]

16. I almost stopped shopping in stores about 12 years ago.

And my vision became severely affected by an illness 4 years ago so I don't pay very much attention to the activities of others these days. I have enough trouble navigating the grocery isles without worrying about what other people are doing. However before I retired from the real world breastfeeding wasn't done in public places.

So if you want to flame me for being old-fashioned about what I believe is proper in public ... go ahead. Things have changed.

[LeftyMom]

19. I'm not flaming you

I just think that there's nothing wrong with feeding a baby anywhere the baby is permitted to be. That's what boobs are for, after all. :bounce: :bounce: Anyhow, the kid's head usually covers up anything remotely interesting, so one can barely tell what's going on, except with uptight women who throw a blanket over the kid's head to hide, that pretty much screams BABY NURSING HERE!!! :rofl:

[In_The_Wind]

20. I don't have anything against babies being nursed in public.

[ronnykmarshall]

37. Just as long as when they grow up ...

people don't take the little bastards to a resturant.

I can't STAND it when I'm chomping down on a nice veal cutlet to hear some fucking kid yapping it's mouth or crying.

And LOUD PRAYING !!!! Don't get me started on THAT!! I want to rip off my mink coat and beat them over the head!!

[bicentennial_baby]

23. I will...

Get over it! Jesus f'n Christ on a cracker...Breasts are not solely sexual, and there is no reason on Earth why a woman should not be able to nourish her child when and where she feels it is necessary...Old-fashioned indeed... :eyes:

[In_The_Wind]

29. Hello bi-baby.

[Irreverend IX]

53. I disagree with you.

The human female breast is the number one source of pure Evil in the world today. In fact, scientifical studies have proved that the common exposure of breasts in Africa is the primary cause of the wars and genocides there. If you look back through history, you will observe that in societies where naked breasts are more commonly observed than ours (that is, just about all of them) a variety of unsavory things were practiced, like crusades, human sacrifices, political imprisonment and Russian Roulette. This makes it empirically clear that Evil is directly proportional to Breasts. In fact, heavily covering the breasts will often manifest as much Evil as uncovering them--observe the religious violence seen in Muslim countries where women must go fully veiled! Therefore there is only one solution to the problem--Evil must be uprooted once and for all! Good and patriotic citizens like us can only pray that our leaders will pay doctors to perform a worldwide mass mastectomy campaign in order to eliminate the scourge of Evil forevermore.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

26. Oh, I don't think you're old-fashioned.

There's nothing old-fashioned about having a problem with breast-feeding.

[In_The_Wind]

30. Geez! I don't have a problem with it.

My original comment may have seemed a bit uncaring but I think moments like breastfeeding are too special do be done while you're trying to balance a baby and look at price tags at the same time.

I think Mom should have thought about her very young child's needs and gone on a shorter shopping trip.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

31. I'd like to believe that.

But you've got one statement contradicting another.

[In_The_Wind]

34. You are going to believe what you want no matter what I say so

go ahead and think what you will.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

35. I believe what I want

because of what you say.

[Karenina]

49. How about if you have an opportunity

to express yourself to your elected leader and the kid starts screaming?

What would it be like if ADULTS realized that infant's needs are normal, natural, need to be addresed immediately and simply carried on bidness as usual?

[tigereye]

10. used to feed my son as I walked around the neighborhood

he was in a sling, of course. But I really don't see what the big deal is.

Is the issue more that some women just "whip it out" versus being discreet?

I breastfed my son in many public places until he was about 10 months old, and I never had a negative comment...

[In_The_Wind]

14. Again ~ there is a way to feed discreetly.

There was a thread on DU a few months ago which shows my feelings about what a wonderful experience breastfeeding should be: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=105&topic_id=4868640#4868740

[tigereye]

42. sure

it's nice in private sometimes, and it's nice when you are out. I just used to wear vests and big shirts and it worked out fine. Breasts are a wonderfully mobile food source for the little ones - always available.

yeah I had forgotten about that thread - it was pretty funny, Joan.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

25. If I can't park in the handicapped spot...

why should anybody else be able to?

:eyes:

[In_The_Wind]

32. Are you handicapped?

[Name removed]

33. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[WI_DEM]

11. My question would be how discreet was she? if five different clerks

approached her could it be that she was showing more than she should have in a public place? If she was discreetly doing it like I've seen most women where you can't even see the breast then I don't know what the problem is. But that is just my point of view. Perhaps stores should have a room (other than a bathroom) for mom and a nursing baby?

[L A Woman]

15. Argh! The breasts are not sexual organs!

They are intended to do exactly what this woman was doing. Is it illegal to feed a child in public?

Grrrr.

[CBGLuthier]

17. Differing mental images

I guess it is all perception.

I visualize a discreet young woman doing her best to meet her child's needs and not expose herself. Most women I know do not like to expose themselves in public.

But others here, i think, see some floppy-titted hippie chick flopping her breasts out for the world to admire.

Every time we get one of these threads the same comments appear assuming she would not be discreet.

I have been around breast feeding women many a time in my life. The only time I ever saw anything I should not have was when I was about 13 and one of my aunts was just starting to feed her child.

But this was in her house so I think she was well within her rights.

[nosillies]

22. Every TRU I've ever been in had a comfortable, clean, nicely furnished

"nursing mothers" room. I've used them before plenty. My main question is, did this store not have one? Or was that the "basement room" they referred to?

If the store did have a safe, clean place provided for this, and she refused to use it, that does seem to be a bit of just being disagreeable for the sake of being disagreeable. "Sending women to the basement" could very well be lawyer-speak for "walking down a flight of stairs."

[LeftyMom]

27. It's not being disagreeable

She was presumably there to shop. If she could do that while nursing, why should she have to go sit in the nursing mothers' ghetto until the kid's done?

[nosillies]

39. There are plenty of things that I have the right to do that I don't do

Every day, I make a conscious effort not to do things that I could perfectly well do. I make a personal choice not to do them because I know that doing them could be perceived in a bad way or make other people uncomfortable. I could choose to flip off every driver that makes me mad. I could choose to bawl out any cashier who was slow. I could choose to get really drunk when I'm at the beach and maybe vomit in the dunes at the end of the day. But I don't, because I choose to balance my feelings and needs with the feelings and needs of those around me.

Admittedly, I chose every one of those examples because they were things that I used to do when I was younger and less mature than I am now. As I have gotten older, my choices have changed. The turning point for me one day was hearing a speaker define a "lady" or a "gentleman" as one who makes everyone around them feel as comfortable as possible at all times. I started choosing to act like a lady -- and I have NEVER had my rights trampled upon as a result. On the contrary -- the world has opened up to me.

I would never take away a woman's right to breastfeed in public, or people's rights to do any of the above actions I described. But there are times I question people's motives. And thankfully, I have as much right to question other people's actions and motives as much as they have a right to do the things I question.

[miss_american_pie]

41. All those things you listed are rude, ugly behaviors

Are you really comparing nursing with vomiting?

[nosillies]

45. It is not the same to me, but it very well could be to someone else

I can't presume to know what others are squeamish about. To me, mayonnaise is one of the most foul and toxic substances on the planet (much worse than vomit). I would never expect those around me to know how I feel about mayo, or to stop eating it around me. However, my wonderful husband does extend me that courtesy -- he considers how I might feel, and politely eats mayo where I can't see or smell it.

[miss_american_pie]

48. But if you go to a Subway

don't you expect someone to have mayo on their sandwich? She was in a toy store.

Breastfeeding should be the norm. Those squeamish about it should make concessions. And that isn't going to change as long as women feel like they have to hide when they do it.

[LeftyMom]

43. Okay, I think I've discovered where we diverge

Here in LeftyMomWorld, babies come first and thier tired mothers a very close second. As far as I'm concerned, any mother who has spent the last few months gestating, in labor, then getting up at odd hours to feed her baby is a canidate for sainthood. People should be going out of thier way to make her life easier, not the other way around.

[nosillies]

46. That would be heaven.

My next child is due soon, so I will pass that sentiment on to my husband and see if it has time to sink in!:D

[Zomby Woof]

24. Yawn!

Get back to me when a Cracker Barrel employee does this. :D

[ronnykmarshall]

36. At first I thought it said: the worker was being harrassed.

I could just picture a woman chasing down some Toys R Us salesperson with a her tit in hand shooting milk all over the place.

[WildEyedLiberal]

38. .

:spray: :rofl:

[Dukkha]

40. I thought it implied the worker was breastfeeding a shopper

now THAT'S customer service! I wanna be a Toys R Us kid!

[tigereye]

44. oh Ronny!

well, you know they are lethal weapons, after all :silly:

[WCGreen]

50. I'd pay to see that....

[Mojambo]

47. If she's gonna bring food, she should share it with the whole class. n/t

[REP]

51. Sounds Like Chelsi Wants Moni

I doubt Toys R Us did what Chelsi (sic) claims, unless being told a private nursing room was available was harassment.

[AutumnMist]

52. I Breastfed Our Daughter

and the replies from my family/friends and strangers varied. I didn't breastfeed to make a public statement. I did it because I believed in it, for myself and my daughter. I had more than one experience where someone told me I should go to the bathroom in some cramped place or I should quit all together because it was an old school practice that had run its course. How many people bottle feed on a toilet? With the door closed? I was never topless and I was never out of line in terms of being exposed to the general public. It wasn't Playboy...It was lunch/breakfast/dinner. And many people would have been more comfortable with me being half naked in a mesh shirt and see through bra then breastfeeding. :eyes: I never got that.