Would you be offended by this comment?

[sbj405]

Poll question: Would you be offended by this comment?

"You can't possibly understand anti-semitism since you're not Jewish."

If it matters this comment was made by someone that knows you very well and supposedly loves you.

[idgiehkt]

1. probably not

I'd want them to recognize I would try to understand it, but if someone told me this I can't think of what I would say back.

[GOPisEvil]

2. It's one thing to understand; it's another thing to live through it.

For example, I'm caucasian. I think racism is vile and I detest it, however, it can be argued that I can never truly understand it, because I've never had to live it.

[mdmc]

5. yup GOPisEvil ... Understanding versus experiencing

[petronius]

3. Not offended, but I would be a bit saddened that this person

was so intellectually shallow (and had such a low opinion of my mental abilities)...

[LeftyMom]

4. Assming this person isn't a convert, I'd ask them how they know what it's

like not to be Jewish. :shrug: By that kind of logic nobody really understands anybody, which is of course crap. Plenty of other experiences can equip somebody to understand and empathize with historical and present day oppression, whether or not they came to that experience the same way.

[anarch]

19. "nobody really understands anybody"

Sometimes I wonder. Hell, sometimes I don't even understand myself.

I am pretty sure that lack of empathy is what leads to a great many of our world's problems, though. From the abuse and disregard of the emotional capacity of animals to the de-humanizing of whatever group one's society has deemed to be "other", all these things are facilitated by the (sometimes intentional, or engineered) cutting off of our empathic sense.

On the other hand, if that inherent sense is developed, anyone can understand anybody else...

[philosophie_en_rose]

6. There are different levels of knowledge.

I understand the concept of bungee jumping, but I don't really understand the experience of it. As much as I can study bungee jumping, hang out with bungee jumpers, and wear bungee jumping apparel, I can really only guess as to what it feels like to bungee jump. Maybe my impressions are right; maybe they're wrong. But I couldn't know until I bungee jumped. (and I never will).

Sometimes the truth is alarming, because some of us really care about bungee jumping and want to foster a welcoming environment for bungee jumpers. But it is simply not true that one can claim to know as much about an experience without being a part of it.

[sbj405]

11. We weren't even talking about a personal experience

We were talking about George Allen and how he was "embracing" his roots. I said of course he is he's hoping to pick up some votes in Northern VA. We went back and forth on that. Then came the comment which was actually "It's not my fault you can't understand anti-semitism, because you're not Jewish." Not only was it offensive, but out of context.

FWIW, said person is half (cultural) Jew, non practicing, and doesn't id self as Jewish.

[philosophie_en_rose]

22. Are you claiming that you do understand Judaism?

You certainly seem to imply that you're able to judge your friend's roots.

Frankly, it sounds like you lost a debate and are using this a strawman to attack your friend on a personal level.

[wickerwoman]

13. To carry the analogy further though,

if I were a professional sky-diver, I might have a pretty good idea what bungee jumping was all about even if I had never done it.

Likewise, I think that anyone who has experienced exclusion or been a target of irrational hatred can probably make a pretty accurate guess what it's like to experience anti-Semitism. Of course, it's not 100% but it's pretty close. As a women who has often been assumed to be a lesbian, I can at least get an inkling what it's like to live under the shadow of homophobia. Likewise, for some reason strangers assume I'm Jewish, even though I'm not. I've never been targeted for violence (as someone who looks Jewish) but I can understand the fear that people live with.

So yeah, it's bollocks to say you can't understand anti-Semitism unless you're Jewish.

[philosophie_en_rose]

21. You can't understand it in the same way.

Your analogy does not 'extend' my analogy. Even if you can make an educated guess, you do not have the same type of knowledge as someone that has had an actual experience. You can learn about it, but you cannot adopt it. It is not a part of you.

Similarly, one might understand the concept of Anti-Semitism, but you can't understand how it actually feels.

[wickerwoman]

30. To be technical,

the only person who has experienced anti-Semitism is the anti-Semite. The target (whether a Jewish person, a woman, a minority, a gay person) experiences exclusion, hatred, bigotry, fear, anger, undeserved shame, mystification, etc. none of which are unique to any one particular experience. And as someone who has been a target of hatred (for whatever reason) I can understand what it's like to experience it.

[Generic Brad]

7. Yes, I would

A family member told me I didn't understand racism after Hurricane Katrina devastated New Orleans. I am in a mixed marriage. I understand racism first hand. I even experienced years of it from the bonehead person who made the comment. We do not have to personally be the same color, religion, sexual orientation as a person who is discriminated against to know it when we see it. Wrong is wrong no matter how you slice it.

[HEyHEY]

8. I'd say, "Shut the hell up."

I can't stand that kind of shit. That's like saying "You can't understand hate." And I understand hate.

[JVS]

24. I'm surprised to see that you wouldn't handle it in the more playful...

manner of suggesting that "You can't understand anti-semitism because you're not an anti-semite"

[barb162]

9. I wouldn't be offended by it at all

Same thing if a black person said to me
"You can't possibly understand what it's like being black since you're not Black."

[WCGreen]

10. It's dismissive and immature ...

[last_texas_dem]

12. I'd mostly be annoyed

I'd probably just think it was too ridiculous of a thing for someone to say for it to actually offend me. If the person who said it was actually Jewish themselves, I'd be a little more polite about it; if they weren't Jewish, I'd just tell them they were full of it.

[tjwmason]

14. No I wouldn't.

I am somewhere between agreement and disagreement on the line - I think that one can understand an awful lot of anti-semitism without being Jewish, but one can't fully grasp it until one has experienced it.

I might be a tad disappointed with the apparent view taken of my empathy, but I reserve offence for genuinely offensive things (which usually have to be intended to offend).

[seemunkee]

15. Yes

I'm not Jewish. My wife is, my kids are, my in-laws are. I've seen it, I've heard it, felt it.

[ThomCat]

16. I'm Jewish and I think that statement is rediculous.

Many Jewish people have never experienced first hand anti-semetism so their knowledge is just as removed as yours would be.

Some people who take this attitude have far less direct experience of anti-semitism than some of us who think it's a trash opinion.

The entire civil rights movement is based on the idea that everyone can understand prejudice, discrimination and persecution.

[Tyo]

17. I'd be puzzled

I don't know very much about being Jewish, but I do know what it's like to be discriminated against or have people stereotype you and call it good without even trying to get to know you and that's what we're talking about, isn't it?

[Haole Girl]

18. Other

It's just not true...I'm neither offended nor agreeing with that comment. Everybody is discriminated against somewhere...whether it be at home or in their travels. We've all felt it at one time or another. It's not unique to any race, creed, or religion.

By the way, if you are Jewish...
Happy Roshashana! :hi:

[wildhorses]

20. I would find the remark humorous.

People continuously amuse me with their antics and opinions. :shrug:

[izzybeans]

23. I'd feel sorry that this person was so scarred they could never see

me as their equal. It's a pretty alienating point-of-view.

[Radical Activist]

25. I don't see the point in getting offended by that.

I don't agree with it though.

[CBGLuthier]

26. I personaly would be, because

I am a person of mixed race heritage who has experienced first hand rather subtle racism.

If I were just a typical white guy, don't know.

[NC_Nurse]

27. It's all context.

I'd be offended if it was being used by someone close to me as a reason to dismiss my feelings or opinions.
That is emotional game playing and is destructive.
In a non-emotionally charged situation, I would not be offended because I am not Jewish and not anti-Semitic so I guess I have not had that experience
and might not know the nuances of it.
Everyone knows what it's like to be put down, humilated or judged unfairly at some poiint in their lives, for whatever reason.

[SacredCow]

28. Probably not offended, per se...

but it's one of those things that's impossible to prove, disprove, quantify, etc.... I guess it has somewhat of a martyr quality to it, so (depending on the person that said it) it could be delivered with some disdain that might be uncomfortable.

I would lump it in with proclamations such as "Only white people can be racist."

[Mutley]

29. I'd be irritated, but not necessarily offended.

[Guy Fawkes]

31. I've experienced anti-semitism first hand...

and I find that a lot of non-Jews just don't understand. I wouldn't say "you can't possibly understand," but it does seem much harder for non-semites (well, not just Jews) to undertand anti-semitism.

Oh the stories I could tell...

[Random_Australian]

32. Yes- there is nothing special about any one kind of discrimination.

If you'd suffered through any kind, that would give you insight.

[hfojvt]

33. "You think I don't understand pressure??!! Well,

fu$% you!! Fu$% you!!! Do you know why I am here??? Do you?!!!..."


"Don't you ever compare yourself to me!!! You've got everything, and I've got sh*t. I like those earrings Claire. Are those real diamonds? Did you work for the money to buy them, or were they a present? I bet they were a Christmas present. You wanna know what I got for Christmas this year? It was a banner fu$%ing year at the old Bender household. I got a carton of cigarettes....Don't you talk about my friends!! You don't know any of my friends!! You don't look at any of my friends!! And you certainly wouldn't condescend to speak to any of my friends!!"


I do not think I would be offended. I just would not think it is a very good argument. I may not be Jewish, but I have a quasi-Jewish last name, but I am not sure if the person means anti-semitism as in 'people being mean to you because you are Jewish' or anti-semitism as in 'reacting to people making slurs against Jews.' Either way, they seem like somewhat common experiences. Most people have experienced some kind of ill treatment by peers, and most have heard their associations - religious, ethnic, political, be disparaged.

[MissMillie]

34. Offended--no

I might think that the comment was wrong, but I wouldn't be offended by it.

[Rabrrrrrr]

35. No, not offended, because I think it's true. If you're not jewish,

you can't understand anti-semitism. You can understand it's wrong, sure; but you can never understand the full emotional impact of it. Just like one who isn't black can never fully understand racism against blacks.

One can hopefully have empathy; and one can use one's own experiences to help have that empathy (e.g., a black person who has felt the sting of racism can come close to understanding the sting of anti-semitism; or a woman who's felt the sting of sexism can understand somewhat the sting of racism; and so on.

[YankeyMCC]

36. Taken out of context no

because there is a truth behind it. However, it isn't an absolute truth, I don't have to experience something to understand it. As a non-jewish person I can not 'understand' it the way a jewish person does. But that doesn't mean I don't have some understanding of it.

So the context matters. It might mean a person needs comforting but it's ready and needs time alone. It might mean they just need you to acknowledge that although you may understand in your way there is a different dimension you can't understand because you have a different life experience.

I might be said in a hateful way to push you away and in that case I would be offended. But if it's someone that loves you you might want to stop and consider if they really want that to happen (push you away) or if they just need a little space for the moment or a new understanding from you that there is a difference if not a lack of understanding about anti-semitism.