Another day by myself while my bf played 12 hours of video games

[sbj405]

And he's still playing.

I want to smash his computer to pieces. :argh:

Just wanted to vent.

[GOPisEvil]

1. Twelve hours?

Twelve?

Find a golfer. A round of golf takes 4 or 5 hours, tops. ;)


I'm sorry. I think your bf should make more time for you.

[sbj405]

5. 4 or 5 hours and then 4 or 5 rounds (of beer)

;-)

[GOPisEvil]

8. Not me. I don't drink and drive...or putt...

In fact, I played today, and haven't had one beer. (Yet.)

[sbj405]

20. What did you shoot?

[GOPisEvil]

23. Embarrassingly...a 93...

However, I had 7 pars, which means I was +21 on the other 11 holes. Ouch. But then, I play two to three times a month, so what can I expect? I had fun playing with my friends, though. And, I wasn't great, but I beat all of them and took their $5 a man. :party:

[sbj405]

26. Glad you had a good time.

The weather was kind of icky here. More of the same tomorrow.

[GOPisEvil]

28. Thanks.

Although, things got a little dicey weather-wise here late in the day.

I really do hope you can get everything worked out for the best for you. I feel that you're worthy of his attention, and if he's unwilling to give it to you, then you have to assess whether he's taking you for granted or not.

[AngryAmish]

69. I can't drink and play meself

One beer and I'm completely off. Do I enjoy rounds where I am drinking the entire time? Yes. Usually at outings where I'm not paying and not driving home. If money is on the line I don't mind buying a few beers for my buddies but I am a sneaky sob.

[FoxOnTheRun]

56. become the video game

[EFerrari]

2. What would you have preferred to do today?

:)

[sbj405]

4. I didn't really have anything in mind

But it would have been nice if he acknowledged by existence.

[EFerrari]

7. I bet if you put a plan in place, it would be easier for him

to go with it. Some people need structure to be put there for them or, they do things like play video games for twelve hours.

I wouldn't take it personally but, it is something about him that you really need to know. He'd be the same way with any partner in all likelihood. Been there. :)

[sbj405]

12. He won't make plans.

Except with whoever he plays with online. If we're out doing something, it's always a big rush to get back so he can play the stupid game.

He doesn't eat, sleep, works less, never exercises anymore, etc.

[EFerrari]

13. So, there's some serious compulsion going on.

Sweetie, take good care of yourself.

[ZombieNixon]

3. 12 hours!!?!/11??!1@

I plan to make video games for a living and I think that's too much. 0.0 :o

[sbj405]

6. I can't think of any activity I've done for that long.

I don't even think I've slept for that long ever. He, of course, doesn't think there's anything wrong with it.

[JVS]

9. Playing video games is fun!

[politicat]

10. What does he play?

I got around that by guiding him towards games I enjoy, too -- we play RPGs a lot. (I can't play FPS because I get motion sick.) We play together now, and it curbs his gaming time because he prefers to play with me, but when we have other things to do, he's willing to help me with whatever I'm doing to get me finished quicker. (He even helped with the canning this year so that we could have time to play.)

My DH's ex hated his gaming - she called his computer his mistress. But it's something he enjoys and it's cheap. He could prefer to go bar hopping or bet on the ponies or the puppies, or golf, or a million other things that are expensive and that I could utterly not take an interest in at all.

[sbj405]

15. World of Warcraft. I have no interest in playing.

$15/month and bunch of time that I could be doing something else. Plus I can't tolerate the noises the game makes. Just not my thing. I'd rather be outside or interacting with people in person (which he used to like as well).

[SlavesandBulldozers]

21. World of Warcrack. ive heard that can be a problem

tell him he risks losing you if he doesnt cut that shit in half. at least

[Generic Brad]

63. But wait until tomorrow

If you say something to him before the beer wears off, things could take an unexpected turn for the worst. Give it a day and talk to him when he is thinking clearly and clearly sober.

[politicat]

32. I understand. WoW is not my thing, either.

I found that I loved Baldur's Gate and BGII, then Neverwinter Nights. The soundtracks are incredible, beautiful things by real composers, and the sound effects aren't icky. Also, free, other than initial investment in the game.

Sorry, but I can't sympathize on the interacting with people in person. Most people are highly annoying to me, consumer sheep who have taken the dictate of buy, buy, buy to a religion. I don't mind being outside, but then again, I have a laptop for a reason!

[tigereye]

11. I make my kid stop after a while

put him on a timer.... ;)

maybe he needs something else to do....

[RetroLounge]

14. He's seriously addicted...

My suggestion, talk to him about it, and if nothing changes, time for a new bf.

sorry...

RL

[sbj405]

16. Yep. And he's in denial.

[RetroLounge]

18. My friend finally left her husband

as he would rather play video games and play poker with his friends, than actually be a husband and father.

Now she's a single mom but I think better off.

RL

[EFerrari]

24. I'm glad you're checking in. That's a really good thing to do

for yourself.

[LostinVA]

58. I agree -- that is pathological

[pauliedangerously]

17. That's ridiculous

There is a problem here. I'm not going to offer any advice, though, because I've had more relationships that I'd care to mention. Is this a new thing?

[sbj405]

19. A couple months.

Apparently, this game is never "done" so who knows if he'll ever get bored of it. Maybe he'll get carpal tunnel first.

[pauliedangerously]

22. Okay, so let's put it in perspective

How long have you been togeher?

[sbj405]

25. 3 years

[pauliedangerously]

27. Okay, that softens it a bit...

Does he talk to you about it at great length and/or explain what it is that makes him like it so much?

[sbj405]

29. It's "relaxing"

Even though when I walk by he's sitting on the edge of his chair, hunched over with goddamn bullet noises constantly.
Not my idea of relaxing.

[pauliedangerously]

30. YIKES

Sounds like displaced aggression to me. Go buy a new nightie and new perfume.

[wickerwoman]

31. They can be pretty addictive...

but I guarantee he doesn't feel very good about spending the whole day in front of a computer screen either. I used to play for longer than twelve hours at a stretch- forgetting to eat or sleep. The only thing that really stopped me was getting cramps in my legs. But the good news is that it always energized me to exercise or go outside and spend some face time with real people.

Does he go through cycles of gaming and then doing other things or is it all gaming all the time?

[Floogeldy]

33. You are where you are because you have chosen to be there.

If you do not like it, change it. You have the power.

;)

[Deja Q]

34. Agreed. He's got the issues.

The OP can address them, ignore them (the current option), or leave them.

The resolution depends on how much she cares for him.

[Floogeldy]

37. We reach, bro.

:)

[BarenakedLady]

35. I probably play with him.

WoW is my game too. Well technically, the chances are quite slim that I actually play with him, but you get my drift. I've been on both sides of your issue, honestly. I've done the ignoring and been the ignored because of that god damn game.



:hug:

[Fox Mulder]

36. I used to do that.

Play video games for 12 hours at a time.

Of course, I was single at the time...

[William Bloode]

38. My ladies have felt your pain.

Until recently i was spending anywhere from 12-18hrs a day on the computer. Not always playing games mind you, but staring at this screen none the less. I caught a ton of crap over it, but ham fisted my way through as i tend to do.

Joke was on me! I got FAT! gained about 65-70lbs. Lost all interest in trying to look good in my appearance, or going out in public. Only wore old t-shirts, and sweat pants, rarely shaved etc. I became much less physical, my libido went waaaaaay down. :(

I was in total denial. I blamed it all on my spinal problems. Sad fact was my actions were making my back problems worse, not better. Sitting in a chair, and excessive weight gain do not help your back in any way.

Only thing that saved me was my own vanity....or what vanity i had left. One day i managed to be flipping through a photo album. I saw pictures of myself muscular and fit, well kempt, loookin' fine. Then i looked in the mirror and saw the bloated shell of what i had become. I used to be able to run 5m a day, and now could not make it to the driveway without hyperventilating.

That image burned into my head. I could not eat without getting ill. I could not look at the computer without feeling depressed and mad. I then completely removed my comp and any other type of video game, laptop etc. I went through terrible withdraws, almost like drugs, i swear!

Now some 6mo later i have just now come back to the comp, and other such pleasures with a 2-3hr a day limit. i have managed to loose 60lbs, and while due to my back i can no longer run long distance i do walk 5m a day everyday with weight training every other day.

I feel better now than in a long time. The depression is gone, my back feels great. Almost great to the point of me giving up my disability to go back into the work force. My sex life is great again, the whole world is much brighter, and i feel like a king again.

[Drum]

40. very inspiring!

:thumbsup:

[Redstone]

39. 12 hours? And he's not a teenager? Then I have to tell you, as tough

as it is to do so, that he's a loser.

You can do better. Start looking now.

Redstone

[MnFats]

41. does this guy use meth?

because that kind of tunnel vision can be inspired by meth.
esp when the alternative is spending 12 hours with a cool woman.
example: gloomy day, go get some liquor, some good food....spend it in bed.

[HEyHEY]

42. Where is this man!? I want to ask him why he's not making love to you!

He is a fool. Get a new man.

[JVS]

43. After making love what is one to do with the remaining 11 hours and 55...

minutes? Shouldn't we wait to hear his side of the story before passing judgement?

[HEyHEY]

44. Nope

Not when I get to sit here missing my girl who's hours away at school... meanwhile this douchebag has his in the same room and can't even pay attention to her? What the fuck?

[JVS]

45. You've sold out since you got a girlfriend.

;-)

Sometimes a man just needs to play huge quantities of video games without being disturbed. It's part of nature.

[HEyHEY]

46. I didn't sell out.. I bought in!

Or something.

[JVS]

47. Assimilated to the borg, or made into a stepford husband

:-)

[HEyHEY]

48. I'll admit, she is smarter than I am

Which may have something to do with all this. I think she may have tricked me.

[JVS]

49. *shakes head sadly and strokes beard*

[Habibi]

66. He got a girlfriend?

That's cool-congrats! Don't listen to JVS. Go make love!

[Redneck Socialist]

59. It's Sunday, there's a lot of football on

I mean come on, that's good for at least eight hours right there.

[Evoman]

50. I love playing games

but I would never let them interfere with my responsibilities and my friends. Just today, my girlfriend and I spent about 3 hours, no TV or video games, talking and joking around....and I've missed that. We LIVE together, but I've been so damn busy writing my thesis that I haven't had time to talk to her. I finished my first complete draft yesterday, so today I spent as much time with her as I could. After she went to bed, I played about 3 hours of video games, though lol.

I hate ultimatums myself. If my girlfriend gave me an ultimatum, I would choose the wrong way just out of spite, lol. But this 12 hours of gaming is absolutely fucking ridiculous. All he wants to do is play his games...well, let him. Don't call him. Don't talk to him. If you live with him, move out if you can. Let the fucker see you with other guys or spending time with your friends. (you don't have to date them).

If he still doesn't get it, fuck him. Do you really see yourself tolerating this type of bullshit 5 years down the road. 10 years down the road? 15 years, video games will be EVEN BETTER...whats he gonna do then..give up washing? FUCK EM.

On edit: Check how much abuse this girl is getting from her WoW addicted loser boyfriend. It ain't pretty.

http://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=121305

[wildhorses]

51. that is sad...people can get addicted to anything

:wow:

[benny05]

52. Sorry to hear that

But I am a web addict...

[Maine-ah]

53. LOL, my hubbie used to be like that

he'll come out of it. When they find a game like that it can be frustrating, I understand. :hug:

[NC_Nurse]

54. Go do something without him

That's what I do when my husband's obsessions become annoying. Whether it's video games, or whatever. If that's
what he wants to do, oh well. Usually mine wants to go with me once I start getting ready to go, and if he doesn't that's okay too.
At least I'm not sitting around waiting for him. If you find he's not ever coming along to get a life, perhaps it's time to rethink the relationship.

[NC_Nurse]

55. Speaking of getting a life...

see you guys later, have a great day! :hi:

[TimeChaser]

57. WoW has a parental control feature

So you can limit how much he plays.

I was really bad the first month or so that I started playing WoW, but that was a year ago and I now play only when I've got free time. But I do know some people who were, essentially, addicted. One of my friends has recently gotten a life and quit his hard-core raiding guild to become a more casual player durring the school year.

[Redstone]

60. Well, it's TIME FOR A NEW BOYFRIEND, isn't it?

Damn, THAT was a problem for which it was easy to provide the solution.

Redstone

[Floogeldy]

71. Yow.

;)

[Redstone]

73. Hey, I have this compulsion to tell the truth.

Redstone

[Redneck Socialist]

61. 12 hours of video games? That's ridiculous!

I mean if he was out fishing or something, now that would be understandable, but video games? Sheesh...

[The Sushi Bandit]

62. The only way to stop him is with Full Frontal Nudity!

I know... it works on me!

Just stand in front of the TV. he will get the idea!

[kiahzero]

64. At end-game, WoW is more like a bowling league than a normal videogame

In that it requires scheduling to play. Once you've hit the level cap, you can advance through one of two ways: you can "raid", which involves tackling challenging encounters with 20 to 40 other people, or you can engage in "Player vs. Player," where you gain honor by beating other players in combat. Raiding requires the scheduling one would expect from getting 20 to 40 people coordinated on a regular basis to accomplish a task. PvP would seem to have less of a time commitment, except the system is poorly designed right now, and advancement through PvP is based on your performance compared to all the other players on your server, and decays every week. Thus, on most servers, getting high PvP ranks requires playing over and above 14 hours a day.

With that said, you should definitely talk to your boyfriend about how you feel about his gaming habits.

[ComerPerro]

65. That's a good analogy. Bowling league.

That is how it works at end-game.

"I have to go to MC at 9 on Sunday"

I can't understand why people PVP, though. Its a waste of time.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

67. Go somewhere and do something for yourself.

If he doesn't get the hint soon, move on.

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

68. I have been where she is . He won't notice.

My ex-fiance used to play a RPG game called Diablo - 24/7 and I hated it - he never did anything but sit in front of his computer and play this game.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

70. Most likely, he won't.

But on occasion, an addict will get the idea that they need to do something about their problem, or lose the people they love.
Doing something for herself is a step in the right direction for sbj405. She'll be living her own life instead of waiting for her boyfriend to live it with her.

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

72. That's right - she would just be wasting time by waiting for him.

[Skittles]

74. get rid of him already

he's a juvenile idiot