*sigh* I had my last date tonight...

[VelmaD]

with the man I've been seeing the last few months. He got a job offer about 6 weeks ago and he's moving to Florida at the end of this week...which just happens to be my birthday, thank you very much universe. *sigh*

So we had our last date tonight. He took me out for a wonderful pre-birthday dinner. There was a lot of laughing and some crying and the most wonderful *moderated*. ;)

Anyway, I finally sucked it up and got brave and told him how I felt...I'm not good with feelings and I admit I'm a big coward so I had been putting it off. But I couldn't let him go without knowing. I got the shock of a lifetime...he feels the same way about me. And it doesn't make a bit of difference. He still leaves for Florida in 2 days. :cry:

The universe hates me.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. My dear VelmaD........

Is there any way you can follow him?

Transfer your job?

You know........where there's a will, there's a way......

Hope you can!

:hug:

[VelmaD]

3. I just don't see it happening...

we haven't been together long enough for moving to really be in the cards. We had only been seeing each other a couple of months when the job offer came. Since then things have been so fraught emotionally. We never really got a chance to figure out where things would have gone given time.

I'm just so frustrated because I did what I was supposed to this time. I have a bit of a history of getting involved with people who live hundreds of miles away. And I have no one to blame for those situations but myself. But this time I met someone local. Let myself open up a little bit. And BAM...suckerpunch from the universe and he ends up hundreds of miles away anyway.

[SlavesandBulldozers]

2. come to Florida and sit in traffic with Mr Right!

in all seriousness though, the universe doesn't hate you. It hates him, for instilling in his heart the need to move here. Ok, this time all kidding aside. . . that must be tough on you I'm sorry to hear you're going thru that.

[VelmaD]

4. Thanks for the giggle

It helped more than you know. :)

[Aristus]

5. Oh sweetie...

:hug:

There, there.

[VelmaD]

6. hey darlin'

It's so good to see you right now. :hug:

[Aristus]

7. I'm here for you, Vel.

I knew this time was going to be tough. :grouphug:

[VelmaD]

10. It means a lot to me...

to know I have good friends who care. :)

I'm going to be ok. Tomorrow is my day to wallow...I have the day off from work and I'm going to sit on the couch in my pajamas eating ice cream. Then Friday (my birthday) I'm going to go do something to take care of myself...a massage or a pedicure or something before the birthday party the local DUers are throwing for me.

Did I mention it's really good to have friends right now? :) :hug:

[Floogeldy]

8. Um . . . .

Never mind.

[Name removed]

9. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[VelmaD]

11. heeeeee...

I'll make sure to tell him to invest in a boat and a compass to find his way back to Texas. :)

[yurbud]

12. If you love something, set it free (below see level, in an earthquake

zone, or next to a paper mill or pig farm) if it was meant to be, he'll come back to you. And you can hose off the pig or paper mill smell.

[VelmaD]

13. I always thought it was "if you love something...

set it free...if it doesn't come back, hunt it down and kill it". But your version works too. :)

[yurbud]

14. yours is the NRA one. Killing someone who moved to Florida would be

redundant.

[Phillycat]

15. You never know...

the distance between you may make it clear that something is there...physical distance is just physical. Nothing is forever. Everything changes.

Best to you. :hug:

[vickitulsa]

17. I second what janesez.

Of course all the other things people responded with are good, too!

Distance alone cannot undo anything that's meant to be -- it can only clarify what's real and what's not.

And being able to touch someone doesn't just mean you can reach out and put your hand on his face, it means words or even thoughts can evoke a sense of oneness that no amount of distance can disrupt for long.

Wish you happiness, and your plans for your BD sound solid to me. ;)

[VelmaD]

21. If I can just get through today...

I'm actually looking forward to my birthday a little bit. It sucks that he has to go on my birthday...but the local DUers are some of the best people you'll ever meet. I don't know what I'd do without them.

[VelmaD]

19. thanks

I've done the distance thing and it hasn't really worked out yet. But I'm not giving up hope completely just yet. :)

[Haole Girl]

16. OMG

I'm so sorry. Hopefully, maybe, you can move there or he can move back...or something could work out. It's terrible that you have to be separated..especially now that both of you know how the other one feels. :hug:

[VelmaD]

18. thanks...

I feel like kind of an idiot today because I didn't tell him sooner. I was too scared. I could have heard him say it over and over again in the last few weeks and I didn't let myself have that chance because I was afraid.

But...at least I know now. :)

Thanks for the hugs.

[ceile]

20. Oh, VelmaD

I'm sorry, sweets! Chin up! You've got some Southern cookin' to eat tomorrow. A good CFS will cheer any one up! :hug: :party:

[VelmaD]

22. I've been contemplating chicken fried steak

They make this amazing pecan crusted chicken at Threadgill's and I usually get that. But I haven't had chicken fried steak and gravy in a very very long time (didn't fit in with the diet). So I may just be really really bad tomorrow. :)

[ceile]

25. Go for it!

It's your bday! You're allowed to be bad.....

[Zomby Woof]

23. I am sorry VelmaDee

Hug your yak, and have some brownies. :hug:

[VelmaD]

24. did I tell you...

I got the yak a friend. He's sitting on my puter next to his pet stuffed camel. :)

Nop brownies today...but since I was a good girl and went to the gym this morning...I'm allowing myself to spend the rest of the day on the couch eating ice cream. I have a quart of pecan pie ice cream and a quart of a new flavor - german chocolate cake - yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Thanks for the hugs. :hug:

[Zomby Woof]

26. Oh my gawd

Those sound like incredible flavors. :-)

Hehehe... I will forgo a joke about camels and humps. :bounce:

I think everyone here offered sound advice, so I really have nothing new to add... just be kind to yourself, and maybe our pal David will be around to waste some quality time with you soon. :-)

[VelmaD]

28. They are yummy

One of the local grocery store chains has their own line of ice cream that is really yummy. They come up with all sorts of interesting flavors. I keep meaning to try the new mango flavor...but I keep getting distracted by things with chocolate in them. *snort*

David is a good guy. I figure it won't take much to get him to order pepperoni rolls and let me sit on his couch and watch MythBusters. :) We lead such excitin glives. *snort*

[buddhamama]

27. Velma,

i hope this does not come across as insentive...

i don't believe it. i don't believe that you have had your last date with this man.

physical separation can be overcome. the feelings between you two is something else entirely. i have a strong feeling you'll be seeing him again. somehow, someway.

in the mean time, a big :hug: and friendly ear. all my best.

[VelmaD]

29. not insentivie at all

I'm trying really hard to hold onto the hope that I'll see him again some time. He was pretty insistent last night that we will. That he'll come visit or I'll go to Florida. I just know how hard long distance is.

Thanks for the hugs and the ear. :)