Why, Why, Why!?!

[bridgit]

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

Why do all toasters have a setting that burns the toast, are there people who like it burnt?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why do we drive on the Parkway and park in the driveway?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE...

The statistics on sanity are, one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Thinking of my three best friends...if they're okay...then it's ME! x(

[Shine]

1. LOL!! Thanks, those were pretty amusing.

:hi: :hug:

Hope to see ya at the meetup, girl. I booked my room. Mama's got a weekend off to herself, baby, and she's seriously stoked!

:D

[bridgit]

3. we're thinking of staying over in the area too,

:thumbsup: :hi: :kick:

[NewWaveChick1981]

2. LOL!

:applause: :rofl: :hi: I'm glad I don't have to try to answer them.... :P

[bridgit]

4. hee, too true...

:hi:

[Haole Girl]

5. Thanks, those are funny...especially,

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

So true! I've done it myself!

:rofl:

[bridgit]

7. who me? guilty as charged...

:rofl:

[Guy Fawkes]

6. Parkway/Driveway:

Parkway originally meant "A broad arterial road planted with trees; an open landscaped highway or boulevard. Occas. also: the planted area of such a highway." (OED)

The park part comes from the trees, not the act of parking.

Driveway is defined as "a way along which something is driven." The 'driveway' we refer to was once a lot longer than it is now, and you would drive along it- like a private road leading to a house.

PS: Maybe Tarzan shaves?

[bridgit]

9. good point...

i'd like to see a tree get a ticket for being parked in a 'no parking' zone :)

[deucemagnet]

8. Let me try to answer a few of those before I leave for a while.

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

Because we want to be sure it's the batteries, not the contacts on the remote buttons, that are broken.

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Because while Superman was impervious to bullets, actor George Reeve was not impervious to thrown props.

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

People did not literally evolve from apes; people and apes share a common ancestor. Neither people nor apes are extict (yet) because they each occupy and exploit their own respective biological niche.

[bridgit]

11. that works...

:)

[sakabatou]

10. The reason why glue doesn't stick to the bottle

The insides are sprayed with a non-stick ploymer, like Teflon. Glue sticks when it sets or dries.

[bridgit]

12. hm, reasonable...

:)

[cwydro]

13. thanks for the laughs!

:rofl: