Which Religion will Michael Jackson Convert To?

[WoodrowFan]

Poll question: Which Religion will Michael Jackson Convert To?

The Strawberry thread made me think of this (or maybe it was, oh, i don't know, SATAN!?) But I'd lay good odds Michael Jackson will at some point announce he has converted/joined a particular faith. My question which will it be??

[Scurrilous]

1. If he's smart...

...he'll become a Scientologist. They're very litigious and sue the pants off anyone who badmouths a member.

[Drifter]

2. The First Church of Applientology ...

L Ron Hoover.

"The white zone is for loading and unloading only"

"A Latent Appliance Fetishist is a person who refuses to admit to his or herself that sexual gratification can only be achieved through the use of MACHINES... Get the picture?"

Cheers
Drifter

[SheilaT]

3. Isn't he already

Seventh Day Adventist? I thought I heard that many years ago about him and the whole Jackson family. With all due respect, that's not quite a mainstream religion.

I wonder how Scientologists would react to his becoming one of them.

[WildClarySage]

5. I thought

they were Jehovah's Witnesses

[SheilaT]

12. oops.

I think you're right.

[Screaming Lord Byron]

4. Presbyterianism. He needs some good old shame and guilt! n/t

[WoodrowFan]

6. that's Catholic

I'm Presbyterian. If he joined us he'd just have a ton of committee meeting to attend.

[Screaming Lord Byron]

8. Yeah, I suppose the Catholics have the handle on guilt

but when I was a kid, the Presbyterian church I went to was quite big on shame, but that's Scotland for you.

[Garage Queen]

9. As I told a friend: the Jews may have "invented" guilt,

but the Catholics raised it to a high art form. (hee!)

And at the church I sing at, the Presby's refer to themselves as the "Frozen Chosen."

[WoodrowFan]

10. frozen chosen, that's us!

If you hear someone shout "AMEN" in Presbyterian church you know there's a Baptist visiting that day.

[felonious thunk]

7. He will join the Leader

And they will ride the spaceship to Blisstonia.

[ArkDem]

11. Any religion that will fight ending sentence's with prepositions!

.

[Interrobang]

13. Or maybe any religion that will fight writing plurals with apostrophes?

Sorry, my ironometer just went flatline beyond the red...

(Possessives have apostrophes, plurals none!!)

Besides which, although it's not applicable in this case, it's perfectly ok to end a sentence with a preposition if (and only if) that preposition is part and parcel of a *phrasal verb*... (For example, "put," "put up," and "put up with" all have different meanings. The latter two are phrasal verbs. Sometimes, Winston Churchill notwithstanding, it's a lot easier to just leave the poor phrasal verb where it is.)


This has been Yet Another Helpful Post by your Friendly Neighbourhood Oberstgrammarfuhrer! Jawohl!

[AngryAmish]

14. That Jewish sect that Whitney and Bobby joined last summer