Inside info on WMDs finally found!

[JackSwift]

that Saddam's WMD program was to eat a lot of beans and launch a gas attack within hours afterwards. This was not just a mere program, but a smorgasbord of mass destruction. With his elite Republican guard quaffing down beans by the boatload, they would only have to aim and "fire", that is, to light a match. Never has Western Civilization been in such danger of mass stinktion on the knife edge of being full of shit since at least the January State of the Union Speech. Bush was so certain of the WMD program because he had tried it himself, and in fact was prepared to gas the entire Congress in joint session before he learned that they too were full of shit. Bush, liking the smell of other people's farts screamed: "Bring it on!"