Another thread got me thinking... anyone else who DOESN'T want a funeral?

[belladonna]

I don't and I've made that very clear to my SO and close family members. I don't want my family paying out a ton of money for a casket and a viewing and then, the next day, some guy who I've probably never met in my life standing over me saying some trite shit about how I'm in a better place... especially since I don't really believe in the whole invisible man in the sky and heaven and hell stuff. I want to be cremated and, if my family wants to do anything at all, they can do a memorial at my Mom's house (because I refuse to believe I'll outlive her, go figure) and tell funny stories about me and such.

Anyone else feel the same?

[idgiehkt]

1. yes.

good point. If people wanna get together in a park and have a party in my name that will be cool. But I still posted in the funeral thread earlier, lol. I want to be cremated too.

[RevolutionaryActs]

2. That's what we did when my dad died.

We had a memorial at my uncles house (my dads brother.) Lots of old friends of my dads came, there were a couple toasts and things. It was really nice.

That's what I want to happen when I go, only I want it to be a raging kegger. :rofl:

[belladonna]

5. I'd love to have the raging kegger too

Or just a party... I want my life celebrated, dammit. No amount of mourning will bring me back.

[LeftyMom]

3. That's pretty much how we do funerals in my family

My paternal Grandmother had a graveside service and a small reception afterward because the church community in her town wanted to do one but otherwise we usually just have a private family party to celebrate that person.

[belladonna]

7. Exactly, celebrate the person's life

I think my family is cool with my wishes, for the most part. The only one I worry about is my oldest daughter. She doesn't like the idea at all.

[Suich]

4. Cremation here, too!

If there's any money around, it's to be spent on alcohol for a wake!!!

:hi:

[TechBear_Seattle]

6. I don't want one either, but...

It's not like I will have much of a say in the matter.

Funerals are for the living, after all, not the dead. I like the thought of being buried unembalmed and unboxed under an oak or apple tree, and I have both told my family about this desire and have written instructions among my other vital papers. But if my survivors want to blow my life insurance on an expensive cask and a big church funeral, who am I to stop them?

[Viva_La_Revolution]

8. I want a Party!

Celebrate my life, enjoy yourselves... pour some whiskey on my grave before you pass out...

[flvegan]

9. I've been very specific...

Toss the body in a dumpster (NOT btw, what a mother wants to hear) and spend the money on taking care of the doggies left behind. Hell, those thousands of bucks spent to inter me could help a whole lot of people and animals. I'd rather that be my physical body's legacy.

Besides, I'm totally down for the haunting. w00t!!

[belladonna]

10. Haha, I SO HOPE I can come back and haunt people

Oh, the fun I'll have :bounce:

You're right though... I can think of so may other good uses for 20 or 30k, which is rock bottom pricing for most funerals, than spending it on some silly ceremony. You don't need a funeral home or church to celebrate my life OR mourn my passing.

[flvegan]

13. I hope that

you don't pass any time soon, but for real...you should come haunt me. No, really. I'd dig that. Like, in my house and shit. You'd be like, "Boooo!!!!! I'm the ghost of belladonna!!!" And I'd be like, "Awesome, so here's where we get nekkid and whatnot, right?"

I'm not only a perv, I'm like the Jay (from the Jay and Silent Bob team) to the nth power.

snoogins.

[belladonna]

14. You will be at the top of the list of people I haunt

Course, if ghosts truly ARE invisible, the getting nekkid part might be kinda hard to pull off :D

[kath]

43. 20 or 30K?!?! Are you series?!11! That's hughly expensive!1!11

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

11. An old-fashioned, Irish-style wake would be more to my liking.

Not some lugubrious affair in a gloomy church with floral wreaths and my pasty corpse in a casket up front. Bleh. Take the money that would be spent for that crap and instead buy some really good booze and have a party.

[cwydro]

16. Yeah

that's my thinking too.:toast: :party:

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

17. I'm thinking a couple of cases of Glenfiddich should do it

and a very loud punk band. Even if nobody remembers me for me, they'll remember my going-away party.

[cwydro]

18. Glenfiddich

Oh HELL yeah.

[femmocrat]

12. Yep, same here.

No funeral, no viewing, no obit. Nothing.
I don't want to be cremated, though. Just put me in a drawer in a mausoleum, thank you. That's all I want.

[BamaGirl]

15. Not me

Cremate me, have a party, and be done with it lol. ;) I've told my family that. Will they do it? Who knows.

[struggle4progress]

19. A priest, a Buddhist monk, and a rabbi discussed what they wanted said at their funerals.

The priest said: I hope they say "He was a good man who was charitable to the poor."

The Buddhist said: I hope they say "He helped people cut through illusion and suffering to reach nirvana."

The rabbi said: I hope they say "Look! He's moving his feet!"

[ganeshji]

20. No funeral.

Put me here instead.
http://www.eternalreefs.com/resources/links.html

[SoyCat]

21. Cremation, no memorial service of any kind whatsoever, and absolutely no prayers

[bertha katzenengel]

22. No funeral for me.

1. Cremation
2. Ashes off the Huntington Beach pier, with my beloved and my sisters there, and with no fanfare
3. PARTY! Remember me with love. Don't mourn me. I lived well and loved well and had fun

[Q32]

23. I couldn't agree more.

I don't believe in an afterlife, and I do not want my family wasting money on a ceremony that covers only one day. Funeral homes are the biggest ripoff since the shopping channel and I will not have my loved ones lining their pockets on a rite that I wouldn't attend even if I were the guest star.

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

24. Naw, I don't want one ...

I'm pretty much uncomfortable in big social settings. Not that I would notice, probably. If a few friends want to go the bar and spend whatever they find in my pockets, go for it. As to disposal, cremation, or conversion to Soylent Green is fine with me.

And no viking funny-stuff either. I don't like boats.

:)

[Wapsie B]

25. I sure don't.

For what a funeral costs you could throw one nice party. Imported beer, fine scotch and bourbons and a damn fine band. Celebrate life by having a fine sendoff, not some morbid funeral service. Throw me in a pine box and cremate me.

[Rosemary2205]

26. I'm donating myself then getting cremated.

I have it all legaled out and everything. If my husband is alive he can decide to keep me on the mantle or sprink me around or stick me in a vault or whatever. He says he want a coffin and we can both fit in one piece of real estate or vault(condo) or whatever. I'd just as soon be sprinkled but it's whatever gives him or my family the most comfort.

[yellowdogmi]

27. I want something sort of strange.

As a former sailor I want a burial at sea. The strange part is that I want to flung by a catapult into the sea. Not sure that it will happen as I have trusted my oldest friend with this knowledge and he has let me down in the past. However if he does follow my instructions there should be a huge pagan beach party in Pensacola after the event.

[Joey Liberal]

28. I don't want a funeral either

All I want is to be an organ donor and then be cremated. I want some kick ass rock n roll (AC/DC) playing as my ashes are sprinkled into the air at a nearby lake. I just can't imagine being embalmed, dressed in a suit, placed in a coffin, and going through some bullshit, expensive funeral.

[BarenakedLady]

29. I feel exactly the same way as you, but

Funerals are for the living. While I don't want them shelling out the money, I know that is what they will want to do. I will, however, be cremated after donating whatever organs are useable. That is what I want. The rest will be up to them. Whatever gives them the most comfort.

[leftofthedial]

30. I want a leftofthedial-apalooza to rival the one they gave raygun

Businesses should close. Flags should fly at half mast. Women should cut their hair and tear their clothes. Men should stay drunk for two weeks.

Then, Keith Olbermann, after one of his special commentaries on how the world can't possibly survive the repuke onslaught without leftofthedial's wise counsel, should grin, say "oh never mind," and flip a switch that sends me into the cremation oven "live" on Countdown.

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

31. I could give a crap what they do

up to my kids

[TheCentepedeShoes]

32. Cremation

Toss the ashes at water crossing #6 in Palo Duro Canyon. Get fried chicken and sides from United and have a picnic.

[Heidi]

33. No funeral for me. (nt)

[driver8]

34. I am with you 100% on this one.

I don't want to lay in a box in the ground. Just the thought of that gives me the creeps.

I want to be cremated and I don't care what they do with my ashes...

I definitely do not want a funeral.

[wildhorses]

35. me--

has nothing to do with religous beliefs--quite the opposite in fact though i guess you would call it spiritual...

:hi:

[buddhamama]

36. cremation

my loved ones know where i'd like to be scattered.

[Skittles]

37. ME, ME

I'd like to be cremated with no religious ceremony - quite frankly I find funerals MORBID

[Phentex]

38. I feel the same and "my people" know it....

If something happened soon, I suspect my mom would have some sort of memorial anyway. I know my husband would not be in attendance however.

[bikebloke]

39. Not me

No ceremony for me. I want the old husk to be buried with a tree planted over it. Then it nutures new life. Or the Swedes have a way of flash freezing the body, then vibrating it into granular form. Then you pour the bucket into a hole and plant the tree over it. But that might be expensive, so the former might be better. And certainly no religious babble uttered.

As for those who knew me (if I haven't turned into a total recluse by then), they can have a happy party.

[SoyCat]

45. I read about the Swedish process and if I had the money to invest, I swear I'd bring that technology

to NW FL. There's a "green" cemetery here and I think that process would dovetail really well with their services.

[Blue_Tires]

40. no funeral industry parasites are getting my cash when I am dead!

[SPKrazy]

41. I'm Thinking Cremation

by the Neptune society

and a wake

[Shine]

42. It sounds as if you are making a distinction between "funeral" and "memorial"

which many people don't do. They consider them to be kind of the same.

I guess it all depends on what one chooses to do with one's body and one's spiritual tradition, if any.

Like you, I intend to have my body cremated, after I die. I also expect there will be some sort of memorial service to honor my life and to share happy memories.

I am a Hospice volunteer and speaking from experience, having those important rituals of funerals and/or memorials are extremely valuable to the loved ones left behind. We need to be able to have the opportunity to honor the dead, let go, say goodbye....sometimes the act of seeing the dead body can help this process.

I hope, no matter what happens, we are ALL remembered with Love. :hi: Love NEVER dies.

[blockhead]

44. cremate me

and put my ashes in a batch of mortar. a stone fireplace would be nice and cozy.

[Arkansas Granny]

46. I feel the same way. I've talked to my kids about it and they have

already decided where they will scatter my ashes after the cremation. I will leave the services up to them. They can arrange whatever they feel is suitable, as long as it's not some long boohooing service.

[Drum]

47. Burial at sea for me, please.

Just like the old days: just sew my carcass in a piece of sailcloth and put me over the side with a few kind words. The best kind of recycling!

[Fuzz]

48. I agree. Cremated, party with friends and family where

people say bad and good things about me, laugh, drink, smoke cigars and talk about all the stupid things I did and how my existence made them better or worse.

My wife and father know of this, but I should put it in writing.

[Bill McBlueState]

49. I don't really care what happens

I'll be dead -- it's not my problem. :)

[u4ic]

50. A memorial, not a funeral

preferably something either myself and my loved ones create together, or my loved ones with a Unitarian minister I know well. As I believe it's a transition, rather than a finality, it would definitely incorporate that; and a celebration of life. I would not want it to be a serious and sober affair; a bit reflective perhaps, but not 'heavy'.

I want to be cremated as well, and my ashes scattered...I have not yet decided where I would like that to happen.

[madrchsod]

51. yes

sing a song and spread my ashes over my parents and grandparents graves....after all -"all we are is dust in the wind"

[Patiod]

52. A Quaker funeral? A well-lived life should be celebrated

Everyone stands and recounts something about the deceased

One of my friends, she and her husband weren't involved with a church when her husband died suddenly of a heart attack at 48. They had just decided to send their kids to Friends schools, so she secured a local Meetinghouse and since I was the only Quaker she knew, she asked me if I'd officiate at a Quaker funeral for her husband.

It was an amazing experience.

Friends (small "f"), relatives and co-workers all recounted their perspective on her husband's life. One idiot friend of ours mentioned that she had "dated a LOT of men - and I mean A LOT - but she chose M and that was saying a lot for M if she settled down with him" (all of us who knew her in her wild days hid our faces so as not to give away that we were laughing). But there were some wonderful tributes for the kids to hear, and we all came away with the thought that M had siezed life and lived it to its fullest.

I've actually changed my life because of a funeral of someone in a group I was involved in - hearing his eulogy made me completely re-evaluate my own path in life.

So a funeral can be amazingly valuable to the living - a chance to think about their own lives.

Plus a well-lived life needs to be celebrated.