"When are you and daddy getting divorced?"

[youthere]

A question from my seven year old this morning.
Now just so you have the background, Mr. Youthere and I have always had a really strong relationship. He still holds the door for me, pulls out my chair at dinner time and cuddles each night on the couch with me. We've been married nearly twenty years and we still love being with each other.That's why it shocked me so much when she asked that. I told her we weren't getting divorced and she asked me, "Why?" and I said that her daddy and I loved each other very much and we wanted to be together.
Then she said, "well all my friend's parents are divorced."
I mentally did a checklist of all the kids she plays with and she was right (except for one little girl whose mother died and another boy she knows whose parents are still married), which kind of blew me away, and made me a little sad. I don't know why..it just did.

[JackBeck]

1. It's because of all those gay marriages in Massachusetts.

It is sad, though.

[youthere]

5. Oh yeah..

I forgot about the homosexuals destroying the sanctity of marriage. :eyes: Thanks for reminding me!
Strike another point for the "Gay Agenda".:crazy:

[Left Is Write]

2. That would make me sad too.

[Sequoia]

3. Poor child, she thinks divorce is the normal thing to do.

I've heard this story from time to time from other parents and children. Give her a big hug and kiss.

[Arugula Latte]

4. It's interesting ...

My husband and I were talking the other day about how we're actually surprised that the vast majority of the people we know are still married. We had a hard time coming up with examples of people we know who divorced. Now, when I was a child in California in the 70s, the exact opposite was true. I live in Portland, Ore. -- dunno what that has to do with it, though.

[youthere]

6. You know the weird thing is that we live in rural Iowa...

and when I was growing up it was opposite for me. I only knew one kid whose parent's were divorced. Now almost everyone I know is.

[deepthought42]

7. Well I'm happy you and Mr. Youthere have a strong relationship...

:)

Growing up, I eventually realized that out of all my friends, I was the only one w/parents that were (and are) still married. Whether it's been for the best is up for debate...

[youthere]

8. I know a few of those people who probably SHOULD get a divorce..

so I know what you mean about "for the better". ;-)

[tigereye]

9. my kid used to ask that occasionally

seems to me it always happened after we talked about other folks we knew, or he'd seen something on tv. There are a lot of kids with divorced/remarried parents at his school.

Sometimes we feel a bit odd that we have been together and stayed married for so many years.

[YDogg]

10. gosh. that's an eye-opener.

We know a young woman who thanks her parents periodically for being married - most of her friends are from broken homes. Just wasn't the case when I was a kid.

[youthere]

11. One of my oldest daughter's friends and her little sister..

has a really interesting situation with their parents. They are divorced and they are both remarried. They live on the same street across from each other. Both sets of parents go to all concerts and activities and the girls sleep every other night at each parents house. They also have a rule that toys and games must be purchased in sets of two..one for each house.

[YDogg]

12. gosh! that's unusual. i am familiar with situations ...

... where divorced folks are on very friendly terms, and have known one couple that remarried after being divorced for about ten yrs (remarried each other), but the situation you described sounds as though it would take a lot of healthy compromise. Seems kind of odd to buy two of everything, but whatever works.

[youthere]

15. Everyone thinks it's odd..

but I think it's great they can compromise like that when it comes to their kids.
I know the mother really well, we coached basketball for our local Kid's Club together and she told me about their arrangement. She said that they both agreed that their problems are THEIR problems and that the kids shouldn't suffer because of it.
Now I suppose one could argue that the kids still suffer because of all the back and forth business, but I really believe these parents are working hard to put the kids first. That can't be easy.

[raccoon]

14. Wasn't the case when I was a kid, either.

Several decades ago in rural SC.

I was the only kid in my class who didn't have both parents (my father died when I was little).

I was embarrassed that I didn't have a daddy like the other kids.

[BarenakedLady]

13. Heh

Well my son out of the blue asked if Daddy and I were going to split up. There was an awkward silence as dh and I glanced at each other in shock.

Evidentally my kids are more aware than I realized. My oldest daughter asked me the same question at another time.

Oi.

[Deja Q]

16. Very sad.

:(

[reyd reid reed]

17. How terribly sad...

:cry:

[sakabatou]

18. ::blinks::

...the hell?