I just got a rather emotionless get-well card from...

[Brewman_Jax]

my "special friend" yesterday. It simply said, "Sorry you're sick, signed..." The postmark was in town (Atlanta). Excuse the hell out of me, but IMO, that's the generic phrase you'd write for the card going around the office. :wtf: My trivia/hang out friends actually sent flowers. (They have an unfair advantage, two of them work for a flower shop.)

Dammit, I'm not sick! I'm recovering from a planned hernia repair operation. :eyes:

In her defense, I know that life is rough for her right now, working the new job in DC, picking where to live and school systems (she has 2 teens), preparing to move from here (Atlanta) to DC. I'm sorry that we didn't meet sooner and I could have been more help to her than being a cheerleader. I know that she has to depend on the ex/kids' father for a lot of legwork, and I can't change that or time. :(

Also, I left a kinda tactless message about wanting a get-well card from her right after the bouquet arrived from my friends. :hide:

My messages have not been answered all month. We spoke a couple of times, before I went to the hospital, but I called. Nothing since, not even a call/v-msg over the weekend. Am I expecting too much? A little emotion goes a long way.

I just gotta get this out 'cause my feelings are really hurt and raw right now.

Before anyone asks--no, I left no message, sent no e-mail. I'm not calling anytime soon, cause I'd give her what for, and I shouldn't pile on. She has enough to deal with. I'll just have to wait. :(

My timing sucks.

[crim son]

1. Lurking, that makes me sad.

I would think that calling you or sending you a more thoughtful message would make her feel better if she's overwhelmed. What feels better than caring for somebody else? Nothing. I'm sorry your feelings are hurt. :hug: :hug: :hug:

[Brewman_Jax]

4. Thanks much

what hurts even more is that I can see that we can be "special friends" into the future.

[crim son]

6. You must do what is in your heart, but if I were in her position

I'd have been kinder. And you deserve that.

[LynneSin]

2. Some of us are not very good card people

I know I'm not, my mother has to remind me when birthdays come up or I'll probably not send anything. I quit sending Xmas cards about 5 years ago.

[Brewman_Jax]

3. That's a good point, but...

she sent a more emotion-filled thank you card for the fruit basket I sent for her father's funeral in October. I know that she has it in her. Like I said, our timing really sucks. :eyes:

She didn't even end the card to me Love, signed... :(

[LynneSin]

7. I don't sign love on cards either

Maybe I'll put a heart but that's about it.

It's really hard to explain but I suck at these things - I really do hope that you recovery quickly though :D

[MissHoneychurch]

5. I am sorry L_A

About the bad timing (I know exactly how you feel, done it often enough myself) and about her sending you such a crappy note. I hope she does call you soon.

:hug:

[Brewman_Jax]

10. Thanks much

:hug:

[kwassa]

8. She may be totally stressed out right now

and some people freak out when others close to them get sick, and disappear altogether!

I've seen that a few times.

Hope your recovery is going well.

[Brewman_Jax]

11. That's true

my father is like that, too.

[Schema Thing]

9. I'm sorry you're hurting

It sucks to be going through physical pain, and then be hit by emotional pain.


If by "special friend" you mean "romantic", I think I can only be doing you a favor by telling you that it is clear from your description that she doesn't want to be seen that way.

[Brewman_Jax]

12. Thanks

it would take too long to add the past, I'd like to think that she thinks of me that way. Stress is in the way right now. x(

[seaglass]

13. Perhaps it was the tactless message. My mom just sent a

tactless message to me about my kids sending a thank you card to my aunt - didn't really put me in the mood to send the card.

Just a guess.

[Brewman_Jax]

14. Good point

and that was unfair to her. I got my holiday card from her during the first half of the month, weeks before I prepared my list. I should have trusted her to remember. I need to apologize for that. :(

[seaglass]

15. I'm not trying to be mean but sometimes people do get irritated

when you call them out on something. She may have been bothered by you reminding her of something that she was already going to do or she may have felt guilty because sending a card to you had been lost in all the craziness that was going on in her life. Neither of those feelings would be conducive to sending a card with a lot of warmth.

Sorry you were on the receiving end but I'd try not to dwell on it. If she really didn't care for you and about you, you'd know it soon enough.

[Brewman_Jax]

16. Thanks for the replies

I do feel somewhat better. Both the physical and emotional pain are less. I know that she's got a lot to do right now moving across the region. I'll just have to be patient.