How Long Did You Date Your SO Before You Decided to Move In Together

[La Lioness Priyanka]

assuming..

1. you have an SO

2. you are planning to move in together or do live together or have done so in the past..

[Maddy McCall]

1. Seven months as an "item."

Knew him biblically much longer than that.

I am utterly convinced that you can never really know a person until you shack up with them. And what I learned from my ex wasn't pretty.

[Maine-ah]

68. agree with that.

I think that if more people lived together before they decided to get married, we'd find that there would be a lot less marriages/divorces going on. I think it should be a rule.

As for me, I have known my hubbie since we were twelve years old and we dated on and off for years. We moved in together shortly after really getting to know eachother (nudge, nudge, know what I mean?)and have been together ever since.

[RetroLounge]

2. A few months, maybe 4 or 5.

:hi:

RL

[bigwillq]

3. It's been almost six years

and we still haven't moved in together and for four and a half of those years, I owned the condo that he lives in.

It's a long story why we haven't. He has kids and they supposedly don't know that we're a couple.

[Robb]

4. Lessee...

First one was six months. Second was three months. Third is looking about the same.

Good grief. :eyes:

[WindRavenX]

5. It was probably about 4 months ago that I decided to move to Utah.

...but we'd been talking about moving in together for over a year-- we just didn't know if was going to be in NYC or Utah.

[NightNurse]

6. Late 20th Century Values seem so quaint in this part of town

In other words......:shrug:

[La Lioness Priyanka]

7. what do you mean by that exactly?

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

24. Why can't you just marry your GF first?

God!

[Puglover]

47. Instead of being so indirect and passive agressive

why don't you tell us all what you are trying to say. Coy isn't cute.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

49. great response.

ofcourse we lack morality and are doing something sinful.

atleast have the courage to say that outright.

[Left Is Write]

60. ...

:thumbsup:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

8. Well, my SO and I have some logistics to work out first.

[LeftyMom]

11. By logistics you mean arguing about if you're moving to the south, dontcha? nt

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

13. More like my school and her job.

Jesus, I go below the Mason-Dixon line for her.

[LeftyMom]

15. Is that what they're calling it now?

Kids these days, I can't keep up with your slang talk.

[LostinVA]

16. That's the new hip hop term

[LostinVA]

17. I would move there if I could find a job

[smtpgirl]

72. job in NJ or NY won't be hard to find

[KitchenWitch]

9. Six months.

[boston bean]

10. I never lived with my husband before I married him.

I knew him for over 5 years tho. I lived with my parents and he had an apartment.

When we got married, we found an apartment together. I never ever once thought about moving in with him. And I'm not really sure why, maybe because my parent wouldn't have liked it. But I did many things my parents forbid, I don't know why I obeyed them on this one.

We have been married for almost 15 years.

[Pendrench]

59. Similar situation...I moved into my wife's condo after we were married. n/t

[Justpat]

12. Seven years

We've been married for nine.

[u4ic]

42. Hi Old Broad!

Nice to see you around. :hug:


Are you wintering in Florida?

[Shell Beau]

14. Well, since we had already been together since the 10th

grade, it was obviously much later. I think I was 21. We married when I was 23.

[Evoman]

18. About 2 years.

[Strawman]

19. Few months

But we had dated years before. She moved here to finish school, and I was ready to move back out of my parents' house. A year or so later we got married.

[puerco-bellies]

20. A year and a half.

It seems to be working out.

[flamingyouth]

21. Almost two years.

It probably would have been sooner, but he was in school in another state.

[hunter]

22. You mean when did I close my P.O. Box?

Really, I lived in a University P.O. Box for six years before I met my wife, and everything I owned fit in my car, and mostly I kept it all there. I could move out of a place and get my deposit back in a couple of hours. Mostly I didn't see any reason to have my own place if it was just me. Whenever I did live with other people I was a complete mystery to them, even my family. I'd come and go as the wind blew, like Mary Poppins.

I closed my P.O. box a few months after we started dating when we rented a house together. But she didn't move in until after we were married. Very old fashioned. That was a little over a year after we first met.

[BlueJazz]

23. Usually about a month or seeing each other 20 times.

I believe that's long enough...

[Flaxbee]

25. met him in December of one year, didn't see him

again for about 4 months until March of the next year, was married by mid-May. I had never lived with anyone before that, so it was a kinda difficult transition for me (and him, poor guy).

But, 7-1/2 years later we're still married...

[Left Is Write]

26. We got engaged three weeks after meeting and married after three months.

So...not long. :)

[riderinthestorm]

27. Heh. I moved in with my (now husband) on our first date!

So fine, I put out on my first date but we knew. We met in the afternoon, went out for dinner that night and never looked back. On edit, I have to add that I was moved in within 6 hours after we first met. Of course I didn't own jack shit for numerous reasons so there wasn't much to move, but I was moved in there baby, right away.

20+ years married now....

[SPKrazy]

28. Not Long Enough

:cry:

[veganred]

29. 3 times within months - last and longest - year!

I would never move in with someone within months ever again no matter what that situation was. Even though the few times it was "soon", I don't think it affected the relationship and was not the cause of the end.

L

[Richard Steele]

30. I guess it was TECHNICALLY about 18 months, but...

...at that point, I was only going by my apartment
a few times a week, and almost never sleeping there.

So it's really hard to actually pinpoint a single
point when we 'decided' to live together; it just
kinda came to pass with no actual planning on our parts.

[5thGenDemocrat]

31. About 28 years, off and on

Been living together since Dec. 15.
John
The day we got married -- we're old-fashioned that way, I guess.

[graywarrior]

32. OK, this is so cool. Three days to move in together, 25 years to get married.

Hahahahahahaha.

[NNadir]

33. I moved in with her and then starting dating.

It was a very deliberate scheme on my part.

It worked. We've been married more than 20 years.

[mentalsolstice]

34. Let me see if I've got this right...

We met in Sept. 1990, started doing the hokey pokey in Nov. 1990, moved into his house (officially) in May, after Clinton was inaugurated the first time (wiki break), so that was 1993. And we married in Sept. 1996.

Marriage is overrated! Living together was righteous, marriage didn't really change anything.

[Lyric]

35. That's hard to answer, but the strictest interpretation would be two weeks

Shortened version of the story:

We met in a chatroom in February of 1999. I was married at the time. Even though we never came out and talked about it, both of us knew that there was a WHOLE lot of romantic tension between us. In May of 1999, a friend of mine (who had feelings for my partner's roommate at the time) decided it would be great if we could travel together from Virginia (where we lived) to Utica, New York (where my partner was living at the time) to go meet them "in person". So on June 17th, 1999 we drove 8 hours to New York to go meet them. We were only supposed to stay for the weekend, but within a day of arriving there, the clutch blew out on my friend's Mustang, so we were stuck there for the whole week. But I didn't care. The *second* that we laid eyes on each other, both of us knew that we were hopelessly in love.

I went back to Virginia a week later. I was married, after all. Despite my feelings, I knew that it would be wrong to dump out on my husband, who (at the time) had been good to me, and didn't deserve that. I was determined to get over my feelings for Debbie and be a faithful, loving wife to the man I married. However, he put an end to that less than a week later. Out of the blue, he came home on the 3rd of July and announced that he'd been doing heavy drugs for most of the past year, and had blown out entire savings (which he was responsible for) on his habit. I had no idea--we both worked crazy overtime hours and I barely saw him. I wasn't the one who took care of the savings account, so I had no clue that all the money was gone.

Even then, I was willing to try and forgive him. But that night, he dragged me out of bed at 3:30 am, beat the hell out of me, and told me he was having delusions of killing me. It was obviously caused by the drug withdrawal (with no money, he'd had to quit cold-turkey) but I didn't give a damn. NOBODY lays a hand on me more than once, because I don't give second chances when it comes to my physical safety. I called Debbie, told her what happened, and she told me she'd be there the next day. So on the 4th of July, she came roaring into Virginia, loaded my things into her minivan, and carried me away.

We've been together ever since. Time elapsed between first "in person" meeting and moving in together--about 2 weeks. But we'd known and loved each other for about 4 months before that.

[Broken_Hero]

36. 5 months, give or take a day or two....nt

[JackBeck]

37. I think it was around six months.

Even though we thought it would be two years for some random reason.

And like you, lioness, I ended up spending more time at his place than my own so we figured we should just consolidate. Plus, we were the same shoe size, so why not double my show collection?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

39. she wears men shoes. my shoe collection sure aint growing

sigh!

[JackBeck]

44. Sorry you can't share.

I borrow on certain occasions, but I think I crossed the line when I wore a pair one night while bartending. Mr. Passive Aggressive couldn't just tell me why he was mad. He just rolled the eyes and gave me heavy sighs the next day. Men are weird no matter what their sexual preference.

[lildreamer316]

38. ummm..

that depends on your definiton of date.

I believe about a month. Oh; don't tell him I'm not sure; he'll kill me for not rememberning....
(It's been six years now; doing well...)

[Dinger]

40. We Were Married 6 Months After We Met. 26 + Years Later . .

We still are!

[Syncronaut Seven]

41. Dated 90 days, played house 1 year, married 18 years

and going strong.










Even my girlfriends are impressed. :evilgrin:

[u4ic]

43. With my ex,

it was almost a year. Began dating the end of May, moved in together at the beginning of May the next year. We would have moved in sooner had his lease had been different (his original apartment was far too small).

[mokawanis]

45. Only one week

We started dating a week after we met. A week later I moved in with her, and a year after that we got married. We've been married 24 years and have 3 kids and a grandson. I'd say things have worked out pretty well...lol.

[Rhythm]

46. we didn't really 'date'... we went from 'online best friends' to practically married

Oktoberain and i met online...
we talked daily for about 4 months (through chatrooms, IMs , and on the phone), but it was always just friendly chat... never any really romantic conversation at all.
A little harmless flirting here and there, though...

Finally, she and a friend of hers drove from VA to NY to come and hang out in Utica for what was supposed to be just a long weekend. *LOL* When her friend's car broke down, and they had to stay for the whole week we were thrilled!

In that first minute that she and i met face-to-face, we just clicked...

A little over a week after she went back to VA, i made the drive down, and brought her back up to NY to move in with me.

That was almost 8 years ago... :-)

[IronLionZion]

57. I think that's a beautiful story

Good for you. I am truly amazed at how things just fall into place sometimes. it's kismet.

[Theres-a]

48. 4-5 months

Fast,but we had known each other awhile.And at least on my end,I felt safe because he was moving in with me.If it had been the other way around,I would have waited.

While it's hard to move someone out if things go bad,it's even harder to move out!

It's been a few years now,and we have a place we moved into together,that's ours

[distantearlywarning]

50. About 4 months.

But we were very sure of one another. Even so, it was a little scary. But it all worked out in the end... We lived together for a couple of years, and now we've been very happily married for a little more than two years.

My grandmother thought we were "living in sin" and to this day tries to convince me that we should have gotten married first. I always ask why and she never has a good answer. I never thought of our relationship as sinful - the only thing that changed between us when we got married was a piece of paper with an official signature. From the beginning, we were loving, faithful, and supportive of one another, and we both worked hard to make ourselves a good life together. What's sinful about that? (Yes, this last paragraph is directed at the passive-aggressive morality policewoman upthread).

[raptor_rider]

51. Blushing Here

it wasn't long at all. We started talking through e-mail on the Saturday before Labor Day. Conversed that way for 3 days. Talked on the phone for the first time on Tuesday and again on Wednesday. Met for the first time in person for lunch on Thursday. He took my daughter and I out to dinner on Friday. (That is one week) On Saturday he met my father and sister and stayed for the cook out. Came over again on Sunday and stayed late. We are at Monday again, he came over after work, stayed really late and it was a 30 minute drive home for him and I let him stay the night. He has never left. So I guess it was 1 week and 3 days. We lived together for 10 months before we married. 2-1/2 years, and son born this past June and another son on the way due in May, we are pretty happy!

[Orsino]

52. Well, we *decided* after a few weeks or months...

...but it didn't really happen for a year, on the weekend we were married.

[av8rdave]

53. just short of a year

[DixieBlue]

54. Two weeks and I really had no choice.

We'd gone out on a few dates when he called one night after a bad day and asked to come spend the night. I said, sure. Little did I know that, from then on out, I had someone sharing my bed. I still wake up some mornings and don't know how it all happened. :) Good thing he's still so cute!

[Ms_Dem_Meanor]

71. That's so sweet!

How long ago did it happen? :hi:

[ceile]

55. 1 year n/t

[MorningGlow]

56. One year

But we decided at the seven-month mark. Took us five more months to buy a house (he didn't want to live in my apt. in the city and his rental house was too small). Freaked my family right out--I'll never forget my mom's classic line: "I just wish he'd give you more of a commitment..." What, putting both our names on a mortgage and deed wasn't enough?? ('Course she wanted the ring if not the wedding first...she should know DH and I live to do everything back-asswards--we got married a year and a bit after we moved into the house. Been married for eight years now--so take that, mom.)

[bicentennial_baby]

58. 9 months and a few days

I moved in officially the day i got my Associate's degree. We got the new apt. a few months before that though :)

[trackfan]

61. About 1.5 years

[Blue_In_AK]

62. My husband and I were high school sweethearts.

We dated for seven months in 1963, broke up and hadn't seen each other at all since 1967. We reconnected in 2000 and realized the old feelings were still there. He was in Texas and I was in Alaska, and we were both married, although unhappily. It took us three years to resolve the marriage issues, him down there, me up here. Finally, in 2003, he moved up here to live with me in March, we got married in June, three months later.

So I guess technically we dated for seven months before moving in together with 40 years of no contact in between.

[Jimbo S]

63. 2.5 years

We got engaged first, then when her apartment lease was up for renewal she moved in with me.

[jmowreader]

64. Oh, about three weeks

You old DUers are thinkin, "dude, didn't you get engaged like, two DAYS after you met her?" Guilty as charged.

She was living with her sister at the time (longer story than you want to hear) and we didn't want to inconvenience her or anything. Besides, her sister had two boyfriends and got into that three-way shit--really, really loud three-way shit.

[youthere]

65. I didn't live with my SO before we married...

not because of any deeply held principle, just because of logistics. We were both in the service while we were dating, and I was trying to work on my degree. He had long deployments so it just never made sense for us to live together.
But I WILL say this, I think if both people feel it's right, then it's time. It doesn't matter if it's two months, or two years. My mother always says "When it's right, it's right" (and believe it or not, that's the second time today I have posted that quote from Mom!)

[underpants]

66. 6 years

[ironflange]

67. Dated: three years

Played house: two years
Married: 25 years this August. She's still hot, too.

[Ms_Dem_Meanor]

69. 2 months

Hey, I know that was fast. 7 years later and we are still together.

[femmocrat]

70. Seven months

[ronnykmarshall]

73. Met in March

and he asked me in April.

A little background. I was working in LA and living in SF. We knew right off that we were ment to be together.

I offically moved in with him in June.

[Roon]

74. My last two SOs

It was immediatly after we met.