I have a phone

[MoseyWalker]

it must be the latest, greatest phone plan.

Now I have to have GPS.

Now I change the channel, and, of all things not needed, I now need to be friends with Smiling Bob and have some male enhancement thing going on.

Now I need to use something to lose weight without exercise or effort.

Now I need to buy something before the 24 minutes are up or it will be gone - Forever!

Now I need to buy a drug that will cure, pretty much everything (provided I use it with a few other drugs that help to control the side effects).

Now I need to sleep, and dream of the good ole days when I only worried about needing Beano.

Whoa. TV sucks.

[MadMaddie]

1. Hey MoseyWalker...

It is a sad commentary about America isn't it...?

[Clevenger]

2. Go outside. n/t

[MoseyWalker]

5. I've been outside

for pretty much every minute of the past 3 months.

Almost every minute.

[Robbien]

3. My tv keeps yelling at me about debt

how to get more of it

how to consolidate it

how to get rid of it by bankruptcy

I wish my tv wasn't so concerned about my debt

it goes on and on and on and on

I want to tell it not to worry and be quiet about my debt

'cause I don't have any.

[Jim Warren]

4. Rajneesh Philbin: "In America, which of the following food items

are traditionally thrown at the bride and groom after a wedding? Is it A. Rice, B. Peanuts, C. Pudding, or D. Cabbage?"

Sonja: Growing up, I have heard horrible tales about events where they throw rice.. but I never believed it.

Rajneesh Philbin: Heard it was rice? Pretty confident?

Sonja: I think so. "Rice."

Rajneesh Philbin: Is that your final answer?

Sonja: < hoping > Yes, it is.

Rajneesh Philbin: It seems crazy.. but it is.. Rice! Well, congratulations, Sonja, you've own a bowl of rice! < shows it to her >

Sonja: Oh, wonderful.. I'm so hungry, can I have some?

Rajneesh Philbin: Well, you could. Or, you could keep going.



From that darn old TV gameshow "Who wants to eat"?

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/99/99geat.phtml

[MoseyWalker]

6. A Golden Star For You

thanks

[Lex]

7. Tivo rules.

I skip all the commercials. Every one of them.

And it allows me to only watch what I want when I want, never just what's on.


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