well, my mom is losing it again...

[NC_Nurse]

she thinks she's in the 70's and she's being mean and hitting my dad.
She's always been an abusive alcoholic. My poor dad is 71 years old and taking care of her and my
autistic/mentally retarded brother. I'm thinking I need to go there and stop the madness.
Or try anyaway...

I'm not sure what to do....we have bills to pay and I have patients here too....

Little help? :cry:

[NC_Nurse]

1. Hello?

She has vascular dementia....in case you weren't sure what the deal was....

[lizziegrace]

2. How far away are they from you?

I'm so sorry your father's dealing with all this alone. Does he have any kind of support system there? Friends? Church? Relatives?

Being far away when family needs you (and you still must survive) is so very hard.

:hug:

[NC_Nurse]

5. They live about 6 hours away...

No. not big churchgoers.
some friends....many my mom ran off with her drinking.
relatives.... uh no. my brother is disabled. my dad is an only child. My mom's brother could give a shit.
Thanks. I am sick over this.

[petronius]

3. Damn - that's awful...

Don't even know what to say except :hug: ... Hope it gets better soon!

[NC_Nurse]

6. Thanks.

It helps, it really does.

[mentalsolstice]

4. Perhaps call...

the local NAMI (Nat'l Alliance for the Mentally Ill) where your parents are. Perhaps they help find some respite care for your dad until you can get to them to sort it out.

[NC_Nurse]

7. Hey, that's a good idea.

Thank you.

[wildhorses]

8. yes, your father needs respite or this will bring him down

physically, mentally and emotionally. basically he is working 24/7...nobody can keep up that pace for long....

:hug:

[NC_Nurse]

9. I feel so bad that I'm not there..

;(

[wildhorses]

12. oh sweetie--did not mean to make you feel guilty--

just wanted you to know the gravity of the situation as far as your father's health is concerned.
i know cos my family just went through this same thing with my grandparents. just get him some help. :hug::hug::hug:

[mentalsolstice]

13. Absolutely DO NOT feel bad!

I've seen this situation so many times, both professionally, and personally. You're doing the best you can do. Even by posting here, you're asking for information and resources! I don't know how far away (distance) you are from you're family, but it looks like you're doing all the right things, and you recognize the problems. Get help from those who can possibly help you. It is so hard when a person has a mental illness. Believe me, if you're 10 miles away, that situation has it's own special set of problems, as it does when you're a 1000 miles away.

You're sooo in my thoughts right now!

[SeattleGirl]

10. NC, I'm sorry you are faced with this.

I like the suggestion of calling NAMI for some assistance for your family.

Hope things work out very soon. :hug:

[NC_Nurse]

11. Thank you so much.

I am the only nurse in a family of aging and disabled folks. Sometimes I get overwhelmed....