I'm 63 and just joined eHarmony.com. Am I going to be mugged, raped, killed- ekkkkk - now I'm

[patricia92243]

not sure I have done the right thing.

I need to be reassured (or kicked in the pants) I'm not sure which one.

:scared:

[bmbmd]

1. Go for it!

Only eighteen more days 'til Valentines.

[SunDrop23]

13. I agree...go for it!!!

[TK421]

2. Buy some pepper spray n/t

[Deja Q]

3. You forgot the popcorn smilie. besides, eHarmony is reputible...

they do the fun personality profiling beforehand and help do things to ensure you're not hooked up with just anybody. :rofl:

[sam sarrha]

4. have your first date at the local Police Station and have him finger printed and checked out...

actually it sounds like a way to narrow the field..

i am spoiled .. both my wife and i are Buddhists.. it is nice living with someone who dedicates their life to avoiding negative Karma and...'boulders in the road'.. been together since 1972 and we have never had an argument..

[patricia92243]

6. Oh how nice - that you've never had an argument. About the date at the police station -

sounds like a good idea :)

[idgiehkt]

10. wow

I am not a Buddhist but I would appreciate being with someone who appreciates that 'what you do comes back to you in kind'. How did you meet?

[sam sarrha]

16. some hippie friends and i had a house in the county in central CA and a friend of one of the guys

sister there was a Buddhist.. she and a about 6 of here friends were in the kitchen and i walked in.. 6'6" tall with a beard and long hair... there was a big group of people talking .. as i was walking by this cute little 5'1" lady bounced out of the group and landed in front of me with a beaming smile and chirped ..'Do you want to to go to a Buddhist meeting.??'

it was an offer i couldn't refuse... the meeting was really interesting, she dropped me off and said, 'see you later'.. she dropped off her other friends and came back and knocked on my door and and said ..this is later.., we have been together ever since.

i was always a Buddhist and just didn't know it.. finding the Four Noble Truths was like coming home..
i had a revelation about 7 years ago that Buddhism was simply an A.A like 8 step support group for people addicted to 'conventional thought'..

i still make her heart shaped poached eggs on toast with apples and bananas cut in heart shapes soaked in raspberry juice..

actually i was a Behavioral Zoologist and am one of the few people that know about the 27 step mating ritual for our species.. if you repeat 2 of the steps upon leaving and meeting it reinforces the mating bond.. and basing the relationship on Oxytocin, the cuddle drug. produced by quiet cuddling with skin contact.. i also give her dog and cat cards.. slip the latest Linda Ronstadt CD in her purse... i work on the relationship a lot and try to make her happy, i don't out anywhere except to my Buddhist meetings or yard saling with my 86 year old mother.. she has never had to cook, actually she did that once and i made sure she didn't do it again... i do the laundry and shopping.. she is having health problems lately and i try to make it easy for her

[Digit]

27. Very nice story, Sam

I do hope your special lady gets better soon.

[terrya]

5. I hope you find someone special at eharmony.

Well, besides the fact that the founder sort of creeps me out in the commericals (which probably is just me), it seems like a place where you might find that special someone.

Good luck to you.

[kwassa]

7. big article in today's Wall Street Journal

about how Match.com had specialized in the over-50 singles market, and done well doing it.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

8. Well, if you like suburban fundies...

:shrug:

[Critters2]

12. At eharmony? Really? That might explain it.

I did their free personality inventory and got a message that they "are sometimes unable to find matches" for certain people--and I'm one of those. I must have come off as some kind of loon. A friend says it's because I did it when I was in a very rural place, so they didn't have anyone nearby. BUt everytime I try to log on and try again, I get the same message.

So, they weeded me out! I guess that keeps everyone else safe!

[madeline_con]

9. Some advice...

Don't give out personal info, no matter how "nice" they sound. Give a cell number, not one connected with an address.

Meet in a public place, and let someone know it's a blind date so they can sit nearby "in case".

Remember, even if a person has to fill out an extensive questionnaire, people lie. 'Nuff said.

Lots of people think women of a certain age have money stashed away, and will do all manner of crazy things to get it.

Just be careful and try to have fun. :)

[patricia92243]

11. Thanks a ot. About the money part - they'd be in for a rude awakening.

[krispos42]

14. Not only meet in a public place...

but have your friend there BEFORE you show up. Maybe the food court in a mall. Your friend can be just eating lunch or whatever, then you sit down wearing a distinctive article of clothing with your back to your friend.

Then once Mr. Maybe finds you and sits down, have your friend discretely take pictures of Mr. Maybe. Highest resolution possible, from several different angles. It would be good if your friend has a kid or someone else that he/she can be 'taking a picture of' so that Mr. Maybe does not get suspicious about the camera. Maybe even a short movie clip of him speaking, if possible.

Your friend(s) should also be carrying powerful pepper spray in case Mr. Maybe turns into Mr. No-Way-in-Hell and doesn't want to let go. A collapsable baton, Taser, stun gun or (legally carried) concealed pistol is also nice if they are available. If nothing else, a roll of quarters held in your friend's hand will add nicely to a kidney or rabbit punch, and are perfectly legal.

Depending on how things turn go, you could also get a camera phone pic of his car, preferably of his licence plate, at some point and send it to somebody as well. Maybe not the first date, maybe not the third date, but when you finally do get around to seeing his vehicle.

I'm a guy, so I don't worry about his as much, but my ex-wife had some rough times before she met me, so I kinda know how big an asshole men can be. She has a cigarette burn on an arm where an ex-boyfriend put out a smoke.

<grrrrr>

Are you in Minneapolis?

[philosophie_en_rose]

Good luck.

A misguided person bought me a few months. I tried it, but it was full of fundies.

You're required to list your race. And I always asked how people felt about traditional gender roles.

I universally got sexist comments, especially from Asian guys and White guys looking for mailorder brides. (I'm Asian, too).

[applegrove]

15. I've heard of people your age meeting the right person online. Go for it.

Just don't give out any financial information or anything too personal over the web. Try and find someone close to home so you can meet face to face early on. That is what I would do if I was in your situation. Good luck with it!:hi:

[AlCzervik]

17. is that the one that matches with someone on 8300 levels of compatibility?

be careful and good luck, if you do meet someone make sure it's during the day in a well lit public place.

[Kat45]

18. I was on E-Harmony and match.com for awhile.

I met somebody on match, and we've been seeing each other for nine months now. I'd always meet the man in a public place; Starbucks was pretty good around here. And I'd do that not just on the first date, but on the second, and third. I didn't meet in person until we did a lot of emailing back and forth, then talked on the phone. (I have call-blocking on my phone so my number doesn't come up on caller ID.) I would also google the guy to see if I could find out about him.

With the guy I'm seeing now, I lucked out in checking him out early on because it turned out he went to the same high school as a friend of mine and they knew each other. I immediately called my friend and asked a lot of questions.

It's a great way to meet people, just be smart and use common sense and you should be fine.

[CBHagman]

19. Good luck! We're rooting for you.

For what it's worth, I have the impression that eHarmony is one of the more thorough sites.

Also, a friend of mine has used another online dating site (I think it's Match.com) and has generally met some nice people that way.

Best of luck! :hi:

[Poiuyt]

20. Check out epinions.com for eharmony

http://www.epinions.com/eHarmony/display_~reviews

They don't rate too well. I've heard that they rank religion real high, so that if you're an atheist, for example, they won't find a match for you.

[patricia92243]

21. Thanks, I bookmarked this site for opinions on other things. I wish that I had seen it before I jo

joined. Oh well, all I'm out of is money. I hope my ego is not the next casualty because I don't get any matches :(

[sbj405]

22. I thought of you when I read this in the Post this am

ttp://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/01/27/AR2007012701210.html

[patricia92243]

26. Thanks. Bookmarked. I have already gotten several "matches." If it actually gets down to meeting

these guys, I'll run a background check on them.

Who would have thunk it at my age:)

[wildhorses]

23. ugh--good luck on that site

:hi: too controlling for me and, a lot of consrvatives on there. yahoo personals and match seem to do better for me--ymmv :hug:

[bikebloke]

24. Nerve seems fair

Match and Yahoo are being sued for fraud. They post bogus profiles and shuffle them between cities. And since you have to pay to respond to anyone who sends you a message, they even send bogus messages to people. OK Cupid is free and has lots of fun tests. With Nerve they used to give away free credits for posting photos. I've been a tightwad with mine, as there's always some reason I don't feel I'd mesh with various women who catch my eye.

[patricia92243]

25. I have a friend who used Yahoo. She is DEAD, and her picture,etc are still on Yahoo. n/t