My complaints about Food Network.

[Maddy McCall]

They got rid of David Rosengarten's show "Taste," which was the best show on the network in the 90s. The guy was so smart...I really miss that show.



And they replaced him with shows like Sandra Lee's Semi Homemade Cooking.

I can't STAND Sandra Lee. Her show is built around the theme that you can easily and impressively entertain people by dumping some twinkies in a bowl, pouring Kool Aid over them, mashing it together, topping it with whip cream and crushed Heath Bar, and your guests will salivate at the dish all the while wondering where you find the time to cook so deliciously and creatively. And the tablescapes...aaargh! the tablescapes!



Be sure to pay attention to that line at the bottom of the cover of her book.

Not too long ago, Sandra made a Kwanzaa cake for a holiday party. As if her Hanukkah Cake wasn't bad enough... Here's what another Sandra Lee critic had to say about that episode:

But then…the Kwanzaa Celebration Cake. This is Sandra Lee at her best, making something utterly time consuming and disgusting, but ultimately really ugly, too! She starts off with the same angel food Bundt cake, but slices it into two layers. To a bowl of canned frosting, she adds cocoa, cinnamon, vanilla and mixes it up. As she proceeds to put the whole bowl’s worth on the bottom layer she assures us that “this is everyone’s favorite part, so use a lot! You can always make more!” After replacing the top layer and frosting the whole thing, she gets out a can of apple pie filling. At this point, J and I stop gagging enough to yell, “Nooo!” at the television. But it is too late; Sandra Lee has filled in the Bundt hole with glops of canned pie filling.

If you think she is done, then you are thinking this is merely a Hanukkah cake. No, people; THIS is a Kwanzaa Celebration Cake and the decorations are only just beginning. She pours a bowlful of shelled acorns over the whole cake, followed by handfuls of green pumpkin seeds. We are lucky because the online recipe has replaced the acorns with A PACKAGE OF CORN NUTS and added popcorn. So the ideal Kwanzaa Celebration Cake now holds Corn Nuts, popped popcorn, and pumpkin seeds. And the cake would not be complete without gigantic Kwanzaa candles, which she dutifully jams into the cake.

http://www.urbanhonking.com/liz/2005/12/nobody_does_it_like_sandra_lee.html



I know a lot of people despise Rachael Ray. I think that Sandra Lee is ten-thousand times worse than Ray. Every time she says "strawbury" I cringe.

Anyone else wish that Rosengarten would come back and these talentless women would leave?

[Redstone]

1. An artificial cake for an artificial holiday...made by a white woman for a (nominally, because

it's artifical) black holiday...could there POSSIBLY be more irony, right here?

Redstone

[Maddy McCall]

5. Have you read about her Hanukkah Cake?

Consider her "Star of David" Hanukkah cake recipe. This consists of a store-bought angel food cake, which has marshmallows stuffed into the hole. The whole thing is frosted blue, and topped with a Star of David made of beads.

You can see it on her own website; the Food Network site removed the recipe when a reader pointed out that marshmallows are made from gelatin, which is made from horse's hooves and is not kosher.

http://lordofthecrumbs.blogspot.com/2005/02/high-priestess-or-semi-ho.html

[Redstone]

19. Oh, God, spare me. She doesn't look any more Jewish than she looks black. So why

is she doing this? And why hasn't she been arrested to Hate Crimes?

Redstone

[TheMightyFavog]

2. And they stop[ped showing the Japanese Iron Chef!

That was one of my favorite shows!

[Maddy McCall]

11. I don't know if you ever saw Rosengarten's Taste...

The guy was a food genius. He was awesome...I wish he'd go back to Food TV. :(

Has his own website now: www.davidrosengarten.com

[NYCGirl]

16. Thank you so much for that link — I just signed up for his e-zine! NT

[smtpgirl]

13. And now they have resorted

to Rachel Ray (too much EVOO, too many shows, too many reruns & too perky)
Paula Deen (blech)
Emeril (DULL)
The Best Of....
and that stupid show with Mark Summers (STOOPID)

My favorites:

Good Eats
Iron Chef America
Mario Molto
The Barefoot Contessa

All the Food Network now, is a bunch of reruns

I remember Iron Chef (Original from Japan)
The Two Fat Ladies
Galloping Gourmet
Graham Kerr
The cooking show with David Rosengarten
Chef Simon's show


Those days are sadly long gone.

[Richard Steele]

14. But they're still showing the EXCREBLE "Iron Chef America".

I don't think I've watched ANYTHING there in over a month.

[GoneOffShore]

3. I so wish that the Food Network didn't suck

But it so does now.

The only things worth watching are Alton Brown and occasionally Iron Chef and Emeril.

[Maddy McCall]

6. Yeah, I like Alton Brown...

It's about the only show I like now.

[NYCGirl]

4. Except for Alton Brown and Ina Garten, the Food Network has gone completely

downhill. Have you read Anthony Bourdain's column about it? He really nails them:

http://blog.ruhlman.com/2007/02/guest_blogging_.html

He says this about Sandra Lee:

SANDRA LEE: Pure evil. This frightening Hell Spawn of Kathie Lee and Betty Crocker seems on a mission to kill her fans, one meal at a time. She Must Be Stopped. Her death-dealing can-opening ways will cut a swath of destruction through the world if not contained. I would likely be arrested if I suggested on television that any children watching should promptly go to a wooded area with a gun and harm themselves. What’s the difference between that and Sandra suggesting we fill our mouths with Ritz Crackers, jam a can of Cheez Wiz in after and press hard? None that I can see. This is simply irresponsible programming. Its only possible use might be as a psychological warfare strategy against the resurgent Taliban--or dangerous insurgent groups. A large-racked blonde repeatedly urging Afghans and angry Iraqis to stuff themseles with fatty, processed American foods might be just the weapon we need to win the war on terror.

Edited to add: I agree with you on Rosengarten's "Taste" — it was a great, great food show.

[sakabatou]

7. I only watch Alton and Iron Chef

That's it.

[Maddy McCall]

9. LOL!

Perfect description!

[Connonym]

8. that makes me feel queasy

Sounds like something my mom would make. That's NOT a compliment.

[Maddy McCall]

12. I am so sorry you had to grow up eating stuff like this.

Yeah, her "dishes" are gagworthy. Acorns on a cake? Seriously nasty.

[Danger Mouse]

10. I used to watch food network back in college...we'd watch Iron Chef and Good Eats...

and Rachael Ray partially for eye candy and partially to laugh at her :P
I am unfamiliar with Sandra Lee, and now that I know a bit about her, I cannot believe that she has a show.
That Kwanzaa cake looks absolutely repulsive. If I were celebrating Kwanzaa and someone put that in front of me, I'd be honestly insulted. 'Are you trying to make fun of me?' I would ask.

[Maddy McCall]

15. I think that lots of people watch Sandra for the same reason.

Huge tits. No cooking talent, though.

And she says "strawbury." That drives me insane.

[Danger Mouse]

17. I think I would derive entertainment from watching the sorts of 'horrors' she concocts.

I love terrible food...not to eat it...just to laugh at it...few things are funnier than a truly lousy cook who thinks they're good at it.

[Karenca]

18. I use to watch the Food Network alot.

it's been totally dummied down for the Olive Garden crowd.

It's really sad, 'cause the whole network is now pretty useless.