My wife was at the beauty shop for TWO HOURS yesterday!

[Blue-Jay]

And that was just for the estimate!

[commander bunnypants]

1. MM takes me 7 minutes

I dont know how they do it

CB

[Starbucks Anarchist]

2. Take my wife, please!

[Blue-Jay]

4. I take my wife everywhere.

She always finds her way back.

[Starbucks Anarchist]

6. My wife said she wanted to go somewhere she'd never been.

I said, "Try the kitchen!"

[Blue-Jay]

7. I told my wife once I was afraid I took too many sleeping pills.

She told me to have a few drinks and get some rest.

[Oeditpus Rex]

3. 'I'll never forget the first time I had sex; I was scared to death'

"I was all alone."

[Blue-Jay]

5. She came home after getting a mudpack, and looked great for two days.

Then the mud fell off.

[Patiod]

8. We don't want the kids exposed to sex on TV

Plus, sometimes we fall off...

[NightWatcher]

9. before I married my wife, I wanted sex in the worse way....

after we got married that's how I got it.

[NightWatcher]

10. I've been married so long, the only sex me and the wife have is doggy-style

I sit up and beg, while she rolls over and plays dead