Ladies: Ambitious vs good looking men

[private_ryan]

A is a 6 (assume below average) in looks but a 9-10 as far as ambitions go (has goals in life, open up his business, promotions, make partner, retire early, live better, etc. etc.).

B is a 9-10 in looks but a 6 in ambitions. Which one would you choose? Also, B is a little funnier and more easy going ....in part due to less stress in life. Both are nice people and the same in everything else.

A or B?

[Kamika]

1. ambition makes a guy look fine

I'd definetly take A, a guy that knows what he wants is sexy

[greatauntoftriplets]

2. A man with intelligence and a sense of humor.

n/t

[private_ryan]

3. not one of the choices

a or b?

[jpgray]

4. Based on the ladies I know--marry a, cheat on a with b?

:D

edit: actually, I've seen it go either way. :o

[radwriter0555]

5. What do we need either one for? We can make our own money and retire

whenever we want and not have to worry about waiting on some guy to do it for us, then divorce us when we get middle aged and he moves on to a 21 year old.

;)

Not that that ever happened to me, BTW, just making a point.

Chicks can make their own fortunes and we won't spend it on quads or fishing gear.

[private_ryan]

6. some women still like guys

and I was asking if you had a choice which one of the above would you choose. That's all...


Fishing gear you buy once or twice. How often do you go for manicures and pedicures? :)

[blondeatlast]

16. But my husband makes me HAPPY!

I can survive on my own, but it's nice to have the bed warm and someom=ne to kill the spiders--something I simply will not do.

[private_ryan]

20. Personal ad: Will warm your bed and kill spiders for laundry.

any takers?

[Hell Hath No Fury]

44. Sorry...

My cats already have than job. :)

I need a better reason than that.

[hlthe2b]

7. Nah... Give me a smart, reasonably "balanced" guy with a sense of

humor. Neither great looking guys nor aggressively ambitious guys are a catch in the long run, IMO (as long as we are sterotyping).

[jpgray]

8. Yeah! Some female DUer should turn the tables!

What would a) be, the dumb gorgeous girl?

And b) would be the smart, heart of gold frumpy one?

LOL, we have the cast of a typical Hollywood star vehicle in this thread's stereotypes. Or at least a teen movie.

[private_ryan]

9. wow

that would be a tough one. If you ask 1000 guys via a scientific poll, do you think most would choose Martha Stewart or Elizabeth Hurley?

on edit: Assuming Hurey is stupid, but I think she's actually smart. Couldn't think of anyone else sexy and close to Stewart's age.

[DS1]

12. They're both stuckup

Invalid comparison.

How about Susan Sarandon vs Erin Gray?

[private_ryan]

15. never heard of Erin Gray

and it's hard because age matters. Maybe ask people from 18-35 and the A and B would be in the same age group.


Jessica Simpson http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&q=jessica+simpson+tuna would be the dumb one, and maybe a PHD student with freckels and thick glasses would the smart one. Guess the results?

[DS1]

10. It's the classic cheerleader vs librarian argument

I'm in the librarian chasers camp, and every now and then...

[blondeatlast]

14. I'm a classic "Lipstick Librarian." (You can get the whole pkg!)

http://www.lipsticklibrarian.com/

[populistmom]

18. Me too!

:) I try to be all I can be anyway.

[private_ryan]

11. I understand

and we all have our ideal partner in mind but sometimes our choices are limited. We can't mix and match qualities.

[blondeatlast]

13. Actually, B. Not 'cause of the looks, but because of the humor.

As long as he has some ambition.

I'd say you can't go wrong either way, but strictly for the "fun" factor, I'd go with B--he's more my style.

Your mileage may vary.

[private_ryan]

17. not just fun

you want to get married (ideally for life) and have kids. Not a date or two.

[blondeatlast]

39. I got extremely lucky, I think. Not a great looker, but he dresses well

(on his own!) and is fun AND responsible. Today he is sick and is staying home with the sick child!

[populistmom]

19. Can I pick C?

A man who is fuuny, smart, warm, physically healthy, and enjoys his job. I think material goals related to ambition are nice in a sense, but more importantly, I'd rather be with a happy person who loves their job until they're 90 years old than someone who works 80 hours a week just to retire early. Life is also meant to be lived and have some balance to it.

grammar edit

[private_ryan]

21. sure

Brad Pitt. But, he never made it big and is broke. Credit cards are maxed out, and he's a busboy becuase during the day he goes to auditions. He

LOVES

acting (for free at the local theater) and wants to do it, even though at his age the chances of making are almost 0. Oh, he's extremely ambitious in his own way, and never misses an audition.

[populistmom]

23. Brad Pitt isn't my type

How about a Tim Robbins or Colin Firth who manages to pay the bills doing dinner theater, but never makes it big?

[private_ryan]

25. pay the bills

what bills? two+ car household? own the house or mansion? yearly or more vacations?

or just rented apartment, 1990 Honda....

[populistmom]

27. Let's see

dual income
own a small house
1999 Honda and maybe a 1994 one
yearly vacation on a budget

[private_ryan]

28. ok, wish granted

now open the door. A poor Tim Robbins is waiting for you!

The guy you passed over is making the Forbes magazine cover next month :)

[BlueJazz]

22. Geez, Fellow Du'ers....I'm shocked! ....Not one of you...

...has asked the most important and obvious question.
Which one do you truly love?

If private_ryan is not sure and isn't head over heels in love with
one of the choices then I say "don't choose either one"
Wait for your true soul mate to come along.

Having said all that...if I absolutely had to make a choice, I go with
the handsome dude. The ambitious guy could always get lazy down the road and he isn't going to get any better lookin'.
The good-looking dude will probably stay that way for a long, long time and he could turn ambitious.

[mac56]

24. "The good-looking dude..could turn ambitious."

Err... sorry to say it...but odds are against it. If he's good-looking enough, people will do everything for him and his feet won't ever touch the ground.

Just my $.02 -

[private_ryan]

26. we're assuming that he's like this for most of his life anyway

people get hit by lighting too...

[mac56]

29. Odds are against that too.

That's a mighty slender reed, IMO.

[BlueJazz]

30. I posted that because I'm good looking

(and no, I certainly didn't have anything to do with it...just good genes)

Anyway, I didn't have much ambition ten years ago but I finally "woke up" and started to make something out of myself.
I'm never going to be rich but i'm doing ok and am quite happy with life. :)

[private_ryan]

31. as looks started going down the drain you awoke up :)

it happens, but generally he was right. Something you either have or you don't.

[BlueJazz]

34. LOL!

That's alright sweetheart, I still make heads turn.
Really though, how much money and things do you need to be happy and feel secure with?

I mean, if the plain Dude winds up with say, 2 million to retire with
and the handsome dude has 750,000 to do the same, is the differance in
money worth it to you??

[private_ryan]

36. First I'm a guy so I'm out. second, everyone thinks different

that's why I'm asking.

Also, the average worker doesn't retire with $750k...

[SheilaT]

32. That's still not enough information.

Just because a man has ambitions, doesn't mean he'll achieve them. How old are these hypothetical men supposed to be? 18 and just graduating h.s.? 24 and just out of law school?

And a 6 on a scale of 1-10 isn't below average, but above.

[private_ryan]

35. they are your age more or less

and you're taking a chance. It's an odds thing. He might fail in one, but he'll try something else, again and again and again...

I thought of it (6 and below) but to me -- maybe because people overate themselves /others -- 6 is below. Either way, assume he's below average looking.

[SheilaT]

46. My age?

I'm 55, so an ambitious man ought to have achieved a lot by now, or he's just a useless dreamer. And good looks may well have faded at this point. Although recently I saw a man I had not seen in twenty-one years -- he's now 60 and he still looks as good to me as he did back then.

So at this point in my life what matters is that he earns a decent living, has some balance in his life between job and other things, doesn't smoke, has a sense of humor, and is compatible in political opinions.

The problem with the choice you've set up is that it doesn't work that way in the real world. People almost never have a strict choice between two people who can be completely defined in six words or so. Many, many other things come in to play.

[kodi]

33. paraphrasing springsteen: U wait on Romeos U wait on that welfare check

never met a woman who wanted a good looking slug for a beau.

[TXlib]

37. What if A's ambition is to get high and watch TV?

Apologies to Jackie Brown...

[private_ryan]

38. that wouldn't be fair to B, that's why I left that out.

what woman would let a guy like that go by without a fight?

[NashVegas]

40. Ambition is Nothing Without Motivation

ie, Mr. Ambitious needs to be working on making his goals happen and not just talking about them.

[private_ryan]

41. ok

n/t

[Lydia Leftcoast]

42. Neither looks nor ambition are any good

without intelligence, humor, and compassion.

Handsome men without the above qualities are attractive strictly on a superficial level.

Ambitious men without the above qualities are kind of scary.

[Hell Hath No Fury]

45. Yeegads!

Methinks we are looking for the same guy!?! :)

[Lydia Leftcoast]

52. "I think we're looking for the same guy"

along with about a million other women.

I bet the poor guy is in hiding. :-)

[populistmom]

48. Perfect answer

Why couldn't I come up with that earlier?

[Hell Hath No Fury]

43. Neither...

sound especially appealing to me, but I would have to pick B, but not because of the looks but because he is more easy going and funnier.

Ambition is a bit of turn-off for me, unless it has to do a cause or the betterment of society.

As for looks, if the guy isn't smart, funny, compassionate, and liberal it doesn't matter if he is a scorching 10.

[private_ryan]

47. "Ambition is a bit of turn-off for me"

that's the first time I ever heard that. I have to be honest. Would a welfare receipt or a guy happy with his 2% raise a year be turn on for you?

[Hell Hath No Fury]

54. Are we a little hostile?

That's an interesting question. It kind of makes some strange case that those two groups are somehow unworthy of a woman's desire.

Yes, a guy happy with his 2% raise would absolutely turn me on just fine if he had all the other qualities I mentioned in my postings. Heck, those have been most of my partners.

And yes, a welfare receipiant just might turn me on if their life circumstances caused them to temporarily seek help from the government. I don't find the fact that someone may need financial help sometime shaming or "icky" at all.

Sorry, but I tend to look beyond the job/car/clothes/social position stuff and straight to the heart.

[SOteric]

49. That really depends on what you want from life

and no two people are ever going to answer that question in the same way. (Life, the essay question; not the multiple-choice quiz.)

For myself, I feel that it's best just to be accepting of and open to a great many things.

People who may at first seem fairly unremarkable can grow incredibly beautiful once you gain a deeper knowledge of them.

Some people with good-looks can grow to be the small, ugly person they are deep inside with familiarity.

[WhoCountsTheVotes]

50. The reason this is a silly question

as someone said before, if you asked DU men would they pick the cheerleader or the librarian, we'd all pick librarian. Many of us would be lying (to ourselves perhaps). Same in this thread.

[Ellen Forradalom]

51. C

"Other."

A sounds like he lives up to his name--a Type A personality. Typically I don't get along with Type-As.

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

53. Ladies: How would you like to be SET UP by a person with an agenda

concerning women who posts it as an honest question?

[Hell Hath No Fury]

55. From the phrasing of the question...

it was clear there was an agenda, I ws just curious to figure out what the heck it was. ;)