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Both twins are home from the hospital -- Cameron has been home for three weeks now, and Brianna for two. I've lost count of how long its been since I've had a full night of uninterrupted sleep (they are nearly five weeks old now, and the week before they were born I didn't sleep for five nights straight while at the hospital, and its been months since I was able to sleep through the night while pregnant with them).
Because they are "preemies" we (which means "I") have to wake them up every three hours to feed them. I am also "pumping" because they are bottle babies with my breast milk because of the bottle requiring less energy to suck. (I met with the lactation consultant today to begin weaning them from the bottle to the breast, which should cut twenty minutes to half an hour of pumping/prepping every three hours from my routine -- Cameron did well, but his sister isn't buying into it -- sigh.)
Waking up peacefully sleeping babies at 3:30 in the morning to feed them (and then have them be wakeful until 5:00 a.m.) TOTALLY S*CKS. I'll keep doing it though, because its not about me; its about what is best for them.
My husband is feeling sorry for himself because he gets awakened sometimes during their 12:30 a.m. and/or 3:30 a.m. feeding. Last night he got stupid and yelled at me because I wasn't keeping them quiet during their diaper change. (There is always a howl of outrage about the abuse they suffer when cold wipes are applied to their butts!) He is exhausted and makes STUPID comments about how I can SLEEP ALL DAY while he is at work. He knows better, but he's tired, too, and he is NOT a night person. He even has witnesses -- the night after the emergency c-section, he slept through me vomiting all over myself all night long, the lights being on full blast, two nurses helping to clean me up because I couldn't move the lower half of my body due to the section and the after effects of the epidural, and the three of us talking at normal volume levels WHILE HE WAS SOUNDLY SLEEPING EIGHTEEN INCHES AWAY.
Let us politely say he sleeps through 90% of the noises the babies make, and bitches about the other 10%. Sigh.
Tonight the babies and I are sleeping in the frontroom so he can get some sleep. I'm feeling abused, even though it was my idea. I'm tired.
Scratch that -- I'm EXHAUSTED. :(
We'll get through this. He's a good man, but he's really hurting my feelings at the moment because I do NOT feel appreciated. He says that he isn't feeling appreciated either. Frankly, I'm not feeling all that appreciative -- I feel ticked off, taken for granted, and dumped on.
Its exhaustion and sleep deprivation talking. Its normal. And, as I've explained to my beloved idiot husband HELLO! We are NOT the first parents to go through this completely NORMAL sleep deprivation period, and its only for a few more weeks/months.
Weeks/Months. Whimper....:(
If they weren't so unbelievably cute....
Sigh. Give me some DU love, please. We'll all get through this, but its a lot harder than I thought it would be....plus, he torqued me off by talking about wanting to take some time to go play poker this month. Uh, hello? I'm not interested in going out with friends yet -- I JUST WANT SOME SLEEP!!!!!
Yawn....
P.S. If I don't respond, its not because I am not reading your replies; sometimes its all I've got time to do in between taking care of the babies....
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