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My exhaustion is starting to make me cranky.

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IdaBriggs Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-29-07 09:37 PM
Original message
My exhaustion is starting to make me cranky.
Both twins are home from the hospital -- Cameron has been home for three weeks now, and Brianna for two. I've lost count of how long its been since I've had a full night of uninterrupted sleep (they are nearly five weeks old now, and the week before they were born I didn't sleep for five nights straight while at the hospital, and its been months since I was able to sleep through the night while pregnant with them).

Because they are "preemies" we (which means "I") have to wake them up every three hours to feed them. I am also "pumping" because they are bottle babies with my breast milk because of the bottle requiring less energy to suck. (I met with the lactation consultant today to begin weaning them from the bottle to the breast, which should cut twenty minutes to half an hour of pumping/prepping every three hours from my routine -- Cameron did well, but his sister isn't buying into it -- sigh.)

Waking up peacefully sleeping babies at 3:30 in the morning to feed them (and then have them be wakeful until 5:00 a.m.) TOTALLY S*CKS. I'll keep doing it though, because its not about me; its about what is best for them.

My husband is feeling sorry for himself because he gets awakened sometimes during their 12:30 a.m. and/or 3:30 a.m. feeding. Last night he got stupid and yelled at me because I wasn't keeping them quiet during their diaper change. (There is always a howl of outrage about the abuse they suffer when cold wipes are applied to their butts!) He is exhausted and makes STUPID comments about how I can SLEEP ALL DAY while he is at work. He knows better, but he's tired, too, and he is NOT a night person. He even has witnesses -- the night after the emergency c-section, he slept through me vomiting all over myself all night long, the lights being on full blast, two nurses helping to clean me up because I couldn't move the lower half of my body due to the section and the after effects of the epidural, and the three of us talking at normal volume levels WHILE HE WAS SOUNDLY SLEEPING EIGHTEEN INCHES AWAY.

Let us politely say he sleeps through 90% of the noises the babies make, and bitches about the other 10%. Sigh.

Tonight the babies and I are sleeping in the frontroom so he can get some sleep. I'm feeling abused, even though it was my idea. I'm tired.

Scratch that -- I'm EXHAUSTED. :(

We'll get through this. He's a good man, but he's really hurting my feelings at the moment because I do NOT feel appreciated. He says that he isn't feeling appreciated either. Frankly, I'm not feeling all that appreciative -- I feel ticked off, taken for granted, and dumped on.

Its exhaustion and sleep deprivation talking. Its normal. And, as I've explained to my beloved idiot husband HELLO! We are NOT the first parents to go through this completely NORMAL sleep deprivation period, and its only for a few more weeks/months.

Weeks/Months. Whimper....:(

If they weren't so unbelievably cute....

Sigh. Give me some DU love, please. We'll all get through this, but its a lot harder than I thought it would be....plus, he torqued me off by talking about wanting to take some time to go play poker this month. Uh, hello? I'm not interested in going out with friends yet -- I JUST WANT SOME SLEEP!!!!!

Yawn....

P.S. If I don't respond, its not because I am not reading your replies; sometimes its all I've got time to do in between taking care of the babies....
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-29-07 09:40 PM
Response to Original message
1. Solution for cold butt wipes
get a wipe warmer. Far less intrusive and they will be less likely to howl.

And, this too shall pass. In 16 years, you will be foregoing sleep until you hear the car in the driveway.


:hug:
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IdaBriggs Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-29-07 09:46 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. Someone purchased us one of the wipe warmers for the (not yet
Edited on Thu Mar-29-07 09:47 PM by IdaBriggs
rescheduled) baby shower. (We can see it marked off on the baby registry list.) I've been tempted to just go buy one in the meantime, but they can't go out in public yet, except to the doctors office, which is currently happening several times a week. Since "lifting" is still technically supposed to be something I don't do until after my six week check-up, I've been taking advantage of my mother to go with me to help lug them around. (I can carry my daughter in her car seat, her apnea monitor, and oxygen tank, but can't do my son in his car seat at the same time; we finally got the stroller put together, and today's doctor appointments was "smoother" because of it. Its only another week and a half....)

ON EDIT: And leaving the building for anything short of doctor's appointments is not happening easily at the moment, which is why "temptation" is being prettily easily ignored....
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-29-07 09:48 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. How about stopping by the bathroom for a bowl of warm water on
your way to the nursery?

I remember those days well. My eldest HATED the cold wipes, but the warm water and then wipes warmer made a world of difference to her in the middle of the night.
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IdaBriggs Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-29-07 09:50 PM
Response to Reply #3
5. That's a good idea! We haven't been using the nursery yet --
we have them on "wedges" (for their reflux) next to the bed at the moment (which is why my beloved husband's sleep is being disturbed).

I think I'll try the "warm water" dunk thing! Thanks! :)
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Nicole Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-29-07 10:07 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. The warm water bowl is a good idea.
I was about to suggest that. That's what I did with a wash cloth, back in the day before wipes & their warmers.

I hope you can get more sleep soon. I remember the first time I hired a babysitter, I didn't go anywhere. I slept for the entire 8 hours she was there. :rofl:
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LynzM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-29-07 09:49 PM
Response to Original message
4. Oh Ida, it's hard, isn't it?
You voice what so many moms do... the frustration, the taking it all on, the lack of sleep making everyone grumpy... :hug: It will get easier, hon. Hang in there, and vent here whenever you need to. I hope the transition to nursing goes well, and hang in there. It's hard for everyone at first, and I can't imagine less than triply so for you dealing with twins with high-needs! :hug:
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likesmountains 52 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-29-07 10:09 PM
Response to Original message
7. Well, it sounds like you are having a perfectly normal time...it will get better
and honestly (as someone posted above) in 16 years you will recall these days fondly while praying that your teenager and the car will be pulling into the driveway any minute...as an aside...if your babies are gaining weight I'd ask your pediatrician if you start feeding them on a demand schedule...we rarely send babies home on a 3 hour schedule b/c it just wears the mom out too much...pump..feed...breast feed..sleep..pump..feed etc...hang in there...your feelings are normal!
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