Favourite lines from the MOVIE M*A*S*H?

[HEyHEY]

"Frank were you on this religous kick at home? Or did you crack up over here?"

[Va Lefty]

1. Hotlips: I wonder how such a degenerated person...

ever reached a position of authority in the Army Medical Corps!
Father Mulcahy: He was drafted.

[Dyedinthewoolliberal]

2. "Omigod, they've shot him"

"Hotlips you idiot, it's halftime!"
Ok that's really two :)

[HEyHEY]

3. After trapper hits Frank...

Frank to Colonel Blake; "Sire, let us settle this on our own."
Blake: "No, what do you think I'm running? And English Boarding school?"

[YankeyMCC]

4. P.A. Announcer:

Attention. Due to a possible camp infection, Arlene Chu's Hollywood Grill is off limits. That is all.

[evlbstrd]

5. The Jeep driver:

"Goddamn Army."

[Blue-Jay]

6. "Shampoo (as opposed to real poo).."

[pokerfan]

7. This isn't a hospital, it's an insane asylum! - Hot Lips

Duke: (as Frank Burns is being taken away in a straight jacket by the MPs) Now, fair's fair Henry. If I nail Hot Lips and hit Hawkeye can I go home too?

[Oeditpus Rex]

8. 'All right, bub, your fuckin' head is comin' right off!'

— "Painless" Waldowski, to NFL legend Ben Davidson.


"Did I break my time in the 440, coach?" — Superbug


"My god, they shot him!"

"Hot Lips, you incredible nincompoop, that's the end of the quarter!" — Henry


"Sixty-nine is divine! Sixty-nine is divine! Sixty-nine is divine!" — cheerleading nurses


"And don't worry about the Jeep; I'll change the numbers." — Radar

"Oh, and change the numbers on that Jeep." — Henry


"Well, what's the matter with her today?" — Trapper, mincing

"I don't know. I think it's one of those 'ladies things'." — Hawkeye, likewise


And I wish I could remember what Trapper was holding when he said he had an "Oklahoma," because it was the best attempted bluff in the history of poker. :D

[mduffy31]

10. First time that the word "Fuck" was ever used in a major motion picture

What a wonderful thing.

[mduffy31]

9. Someone get that dirty old man out of this operating theater.

Hawkeye: It's a good thing you have a nice body, nurse, otherwise they'd get rid of you quick.

Duke: Now, fair's fair Henry. If I nail Hotlips and hit Hawkeye can I go home too?

Trapper: Look, mother, I want to go to work in one hour. We are the Pros from Dover and we figure to crack this kid's chest and get out to golf course before it gets dark. So you go find the gas-passer and you have him pre-medicate this patient. Then bring me the latest pictures on him. The ones we saw must be 48 hours old by now. Then call the kitchen and have them rustle us up some lunch. Ham and eggs will all right. Steak would be even better. And then give me at least ONE nurse who knows how to work in close without getting her tits in my way.

[zanne]

11. Thanks for the morning ROFL

I don't think the censors would let that one go today.

[deutsey]

17. From what I understand, the studio was nervous about what Altman was doing

He slipped it by them, I think, by saying the movie was about the Korean War not Vietnam. I don't know why that pacified the execs, but somehow it did.

[Richardo]

12. "HQ said you stole a jeep." "No we didn't, it's right over there."

[Richardo]

13. "I am the pro from Dover and this is my favorite caddy."

[deutsey]

14. "Doctor, this man is a prisoner of war." To which Trapper John retorts:

"So are you, nurse. You just don't know it."

[deutsey]

15. "69 is divine! 69 is divine! 69 is divine!"

:evilgrin:

[NightWatcher]

16. this isnt a hospital, its an insane asylum