What is the worst movie ever made...?

[imax2268]

Probably had this thread before but...let's hear it again...

My pick would have to be...Glitter...can't believe I sat through that with my ex-girlfriend...

Just plain terrible...

[Boudicea]

1. It's Alive!

Remember the jugular-sucking babies?

[BigMcLargehuge]

16. It's Alive scared the ever lovin' blue-eyed crap out of me

as a kid.

I think the film still has a few macarbre elements... Avoiud the sequels like the plague though, especially "Island of the Alive" with Michael Moriarty.

[samsingh]

49. Star Trek Generations was pretty bad

Sudden Impact was pretty bad too

[Yaoi_Huntress_Earth]

2. It's a tie

Between Jeepers Creepers (I can't believe they made a sequel to that) or 3000 Miles to Graceland. JC wasn't even scary, had a lowsy ending, and a bad plot. While 3KMtG had unlikeable characters who are almost childish, lame plot, and so-so action. It was the first movie I ever walked out of.
Love,
Yaoi Huntress Earth

[AlienGirl]

3. Ooh, wow, a name that has Yaoi in it!

I like yaoi too...how do you feel about Dib and Zim (of Invader Zim)?

Tucker

[flamingyouth]

6. I love Invader Zim!

We really need a Zim-related Avatar on DU!

[Yaoi_Huntress_Earth]

37. Cool

I like Dib/Zim as well. The name has a story behind it. Just mail me and I'll tell you.
Love,
Yaoi Huntress Earth

[wyldwolf]

4. As a Mariah fan, I admit Glitter could have been much better...

If musicians HAVE to do movies, why do they always do vanity movies? Mariah got rave reviews for "Wise Girls" but she wan't playing herself.

My pick for worse movie is Blair Witch. As Chris Rock said, "What the hell was that?"

[flamingyouth]

5. Eegah!

Hands down.

Makes Plan Nine from Outer Space look like The Godfather.

[AngryYoungMan]

8. It was on MST3K

I'd be inclined to exclude anything that's been on Mystery Science Theater 3000... Those are the movies that are so bad they become fun to watch again. Just my opinion.

[Torgo]

45. Watch out for snakes!!!!

I love that narrator voice chiming in when Arch Hall, Jr. and the babe head out into the desert!

Awful movie!

[newyawker99]

101. Congrats Torgo!! 900 posts

:toast:

[AngryYoungMan]

7. Anything by Robert Altman.

Especially "The Player."

Then there's "Body of Evidence," starring Madonna and Willem Dafoe...

"Bram Stoker's Dracula"...

"Hudson Hawk"...

"8 Millimeter"...

[cam75219]

12. Bram Stoker's Dracula.......

I always thought making Dracula a sympathetic charcter was ridiculous......

[Yaoi_Huntress_Earth]

38. That and...

Did you think his hair looked like a butt as well?
Love,
Yaoi Huntress Earth

[sam sarrha]

62. there must have been subliminal stuff in it, i thought it was OK, but it

gave me the most HORRID nightmares for 4 nights...

[newyawker99]

102. Congrats sam sarrha!! 400 posts

:toast:

[sam sarrha]

63. Killer Shrews, I drink your blood i eat your brains, texas chainsaw 2

:puke:

[stanwyck]

23. You didn't like MASH or Nashville?

I can understand not liking Ready to Wear...but Altman has a dark sense of humor I appreciate. Ever see The Wedding? I haven't seen Nashville in a long time...the songs are hilarious, especially Arte Johnson's, Ronee Blakely's, and Karen Black's. Jeff Goldblum, Shelly Duvall, and Keith Caradine are also in the case. Plus Lily Tomlin.

[Torgo]

48. Watching Elliot Gould is painful for me...

and Nashville put me to sleep.

[regnaD kciN]

74. Wrong "Laugh-In" character...

Henry Gibson played Haven Hamilton in Nashville. Arte Johnson didn't appear.

[mitchum]

44. HALF of the movies made by Altman

and everything else on your list (including "The Player")

I really love some of Altman's films but "The Player", "Streamers", "Vincent & Theo", "Come Back To The Five and Dime, Jimmy Dean" are some of the worst movies I have ever seen

[BlueJazz]

9. My vote has to go ...

...to the "Blair Witch Project"
It wasn't cool
It wasn't daring
It wasn't New Age
It wasn't innovative
It was Boring

[Yaoi_Huntress_Earth]

39. And it gave me vertigo

I'll admit that I never had a movie do that for me, though.
Love,
Yaoi Huntress Earth

[MisterP]

10. Pleny of pain here:

www.badmovies.org

[corarose]

11. Blair Witch & Killer Tomatoes

I was going to ask for my money back after seeing Blair Witch but I didn't want the embarrassment.

[jonnyblitz]

13. oh i liked the first Blair Witch! i liked the goth chick in the 2nd one

but the 2nd one was "eh". its all subjective. :)

[dragonquest8]

14. Battle Royale

:puke:

[BigMcLargehuge]

15. League of Extraordinary Gentlemen

Hands down the worst 6 months of movie I've ever seen. Read my whole review here at http://www.horrorview.com/LXGSHAME.htm

[Rhiannon12866]

26. Thank you for this

I just sent this to someone who wanted me to see this with him. I knew very little about it, but sure do now.:D

[BigMcLargehuge]

35. No problem Rhiannon

Glad my review was helpful...

:hi:

[CanuckAmok]

52. Oh, c'mon...

it wasn't that bad...

In fact, for a comic-book movie (which ALWAYS suck), it was pretty fun.

1) the victorian lack of interest in the "automobile" is very true to character--I rememeber thinking at the time that the Victorian passersby would not be caught dead showing enthusiasm over anything in public.

2) Imagine, just for a moment, that the governments of the world actually got ahold of the machine guns and tanks as used by the villian--I can see them sitting crated in a massive warehouse a la Raiders of the Lost Ark until such a time as they could be researched/copied/exploited. That could explain the time schism between a tank rolling around London in 1899 and the same design 'premiering' on a battlefield in France some 18 years later. Remember, the machine guns kept jamming--I'm sure Mr. Browning spent a few years working out the bugs...

3) It was Gavarillo Princip, not Franjo!

I felt less cheated seeing this movie than I felt seeing:

True Lies
The Doom Generation
Moulin Rouge
Saturn 3
Black Moon

[Yaoi_Huntress_Earth]

76. Thank God

There's someone else who didn't like Moulin Rouge. Tacky sets, too much being shoved down your throat, obnoxious characters, and modern songs being butchered.
Love,
Yaoi Huntress Earth

[CanuckAmok]

93. It was so bad I walked out...

...which speaks volumes since I was watching it at home on DVD.

[Interrobang]

17. Dark Star. Gotta be Dark Star.

Nothing could be worse than an alien made from a beach ball with paper feet, and an astronaut surfing through space on an ironing board. I don't care what you say, Dark Star IS the worst movie ever made. The most painful part is, it's based on a fairly good story, too.

[Tom Kitten]

18. I said it before, I'll say it again...

John Travolta's hundred million dollar magnum opus "Battlefield Earth"...Sublimely ugly and stupid, totally unentertaining and just plain bad. Too bad the MS3K crew aren't around anymore to screen this "labor of love"...But then again the little robot's circuits would overheat and fry in the first half hour from commenting on this abortion gone horribly wrong. Splattering my tv screen with nice ripe tomatoes at least provided an interesting visual contrast with the scenes shot through a blue filter....However, I've heard a sequel is in the works for all you fans out there...But then they said the same about the American "Godzilla" movie which looks like "Citizen Kane" in comparison to this abomination. And by the way did I mention that I HATE HATE HATE this movie?

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

134. No kidding

I've tried to watch it twice but it was too boring.

[Astarho]

19. Manos: the Hands of Fate

The worst thing to come out of Texas until George W. Bush! Even Joel and the bots couldn't save this one.

[roguevalley]

25. wasn't that the worst thing ever?

Gotta agree.

[newyawker99]

103. Congrats roguevalley!! 800 posts

:toast:

[Yaoi_Huntress_Earth]

40. From What I heard

I heard that the guy who played the saytar killed himself shortly after the movie was released.
Love,
Yaoi Huntress Earth

[incontrovertible]

41. Yes, in fact

Everyone intimately involved with that film committed suicide. Check the bios from their imdb page:

http://us.imdb.com/Title?0060666

I have to agree, this is the worst movie of all time. I've never seen the bots so upset, as in this one. For forty five minutes, NOTHING HAPPENS.

Manos, however, was small budget. The worst full-budget film is, far and away, The Judas Project.

http://us.imdb.com/Title?0107284

Don't believe me? Give it a try. If you can make it to the "Armpit of Justice" sequence, you have my respect.

[Adenoid_Hynkel]

117. yep

torgo's grave

http://findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GRid=6921254&pt=John%20Markward%20Reynolds

[Torgo]

46. Hey! My namesake stars in 'Manos'!

I love Torgo!

Yes, it is a really bad movie!

[phillybri]

110. Torgo looks like a chainsaw sculpture....

Classic line from MST3K...

[last_texas_dem]

53. Yeah, but...

Am I the only one who thought that movies was one of those that was so bad it was fun to watch?

I watched it with a friend who had the Mystery Science Theatre version, but I actually wished I could see the movie without the commentary 'cause I thought I might enjoy seeing it in its pure badness.

Alright, I may be the only one who thought that, but that's okay...:-)

[phillybri]

109. Manos: The Red and Black Moses of Soul....

What agony....

[ScreamingMeemie]

20. Noises Off

:puke:

[44wax]

21. Any movie starring Madonna, Bruce Willis, or Arnold Blacksmith.

[Sheet22]

127. I object!

I love Bruce Willis-I think he's sexy and quite an excellently versatile actor.

[Ein]

22. Kung Pow: Enter the Fist

or whatever. I have never seen any movie come that close to pure crappiness

[imax2268]

24. Yea...that was pretty bad...

:puke:

[FireHeart]

27. Plan 9 From Outer Space

The best worst film :)

[MRDU]

28. The Latest...

I give up!

[arwalden]

29. Ishtar.

.

[BiggJawn]

30. U-571...

I know it was a movie, but Jeebus, Peterson was able to make the U-96 a lot more believeable than U-571 from a technical POV...That freaking U-boat must've been as huge as "Red October"...

[SideshowScott]

31. I hear the the new J-Lo Afflect film is a true stinker..Some funny revews

A couple of reveiws of Gigli..WOW this looks like one for the books..I may have to see it just to see how bad it really is..
"I fought the urge to punch someone once it finally ended."
-- Jon Popick, PLANET SICK-BOY
"This is the first time I’ve ever attended a screening where the audience was screaming the word 'edit!'"
-- Jon Niccum, LAWRENCE JOURNAL-WORLD
"Gigli is so horrible I had to go cleanse my palate afterward by watching Glitter."
-- Danny Minton, KBTV-NBC (BEAUMONT, TX)
"Ach. Oy. Woe and poo, bleccch and uck! ZZZZZ-zzz."
-- Stephen Hunter, WASHINGTON POST
"Such an utter wreck of a movie you expect to see it lying on its side somewhere in rural Pennsylvania, with a small gang of engineers circling and a wisp of smoke rising from the caboose."
-- Stephen Whitty, NEWARK STAR-LEDGER

[WCGreen]

34. Gigli is italian for....

Ishtar......

Worse movie...

It's a toss. Best Friends with Christine Lathi and Mary Tyler Moore

Or

Love Story....


What I like to look at is a movie that was hailed as groundbreaking at the time but ten years latter looks as if it was nothing more than a snapshot reflection of the time....

Movies I feel fall in that category are Serpico, Deer Hunter, and yes, even Godfather and Gone with the Wind.......

These movies fall far short of greatness in that they become dated and captured not by a theme but by the time they were produced.

Look at It's A Wonderful Life or John Waynes The Searchers or Casablanca. These movies transcended the time they were made and appeal across generations.

[CanuckAmok]

51. Re: It's a Wonderful Life

Interestingly, it was a huge, Ishtar-level flop when it premiered. It was a fairly expensive movie to make, with the star-power involved, and it wasn't very well-received.

The reason it has become such an institution is precisely because of its failure at the box office. In the early days of television, there was a lack of Christmas-related programming (imagine THAT!!), and "It's a Wonderful Life" was unbelievably cheap to license and broadcast. It had big stars and a Christmas theme, so it became cheap programming to air during the Holidays, and it soon became a tradition.

[last_texas_dem]

54. "Nice" reviews

I'm often tempted to see really bad movies just to see how bad they are, and whether I agree with the critics about them- 'cause I have a tendency to disagree with them. However, I just don't think I can stomach sitting through that one!

Cool, one of those reviewers is from my local TV station in Beaumont, TX...

[newyawker99]

104. Congrats SideshowScott!! 600 posts

:toast:

[thermodynamic]

32. Star Trek Nemesis

They just didn't care.

[Rabrrrrrr]

60. As always, I agree with you on this one

Might not be THE worst, but it's pretty damn close.

Certainly down there with Top Gun, Jurassic Park II, and that Val Kilmer Batman POS.

[Kellanved]

33. Waterworld

Or Batman & Robin

[ScreamingMeemie]

36. Blech, the whole turning pee into drinking water thing....

blech :puke:

[berton]

42. to me it's a tie

between the first Dune movie (althought I like the TV one made later)
and that one with Chuck Norris where he echo-ing-ly whispers to himself throughout the movie - '...but he's my brother-er-er-er-er'
*shiver*

[newyawker99]

105. Hi berton!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[HEyHEY]

43. Anything with Brendan frasier except "with honours"

I don't get it, he prooved he could act in "with honours" and the other one were he plays a jewish boy (School ties?). But he insists on doing these shit movies.

[jonnyblitz]

55. gasp! you didn't like "george of the jungle"?!?!?

:crazy: :puke:

[WCGreen]

137. Gods and Monsters..........n/t

n/t

[CanuckAmok]

47. 'Saturn 3" or "The Doom Generation" n/t

COme to think of it, "Hardware" was pretty awful, too, but I think the worst movie of all time has to be "Moulin Rouge"

[samsingh]

50. Saturn 3

was plain aweful

[MysticalChicken]

56. my brother says...

(Remember me? I haven't been on here in AGES.)

Anyway, I never saw it, nor did I have any desire to see it, but my brother (who's 18) went and saw ...crap, now I can't remember the name of it. It was that one horror movie directed by Rob Zombie a few months ago. Um... heh. If I can't remember the name of a movie, it must be REALLY bad. Anywhoozle, he came home and I asked him how the movie was.

"Horrible," he said. "Don't ever go see it."

"What was it about?" I asked.

"Nothing!" he proclaimed. "That's just it. It wasn't about *anything*. Don't see it, don't rent it ... no, actually rent it and burn it (and he meant actual burning, like in a fire) ... no, actually, don't rent it because then you'll be giving Rob Zombie money he doesn't need."

Anyway, the local paper gave the movie a review of F, which needless to say they only give to the really horrible crap (even Gigli got a D+, and I think the + was only for the Christopher Walken scene) that is the sludge at the bottom of the film database slop bucket. So, hey, Gigli's better than That Rob Zombie Movie, at least! :)

[Bossy Monkey]

64. I dunno either, but IMDB says House of 1000 Corpses

and he wrote it, too!
IMDB users didn't hate it, exactly, although 5.6/10 is a pretty low score.

[MysticalChicken]

67. Yeah, that's it!

I actually remembered it this afternoon though...

[Ein]

57. ReReturn of the Living Dead part 12

Or whatever one it was with the punks partying in the graveyard and the zombies in canisters in the basement... sucked.

[Simeon Salus]

58. Solar Crisis

easily worse than anything I''ve seen listed here

Dark Star is 2001 compared to Solar Crisis.

[L.A.dweller]

59. The Hours

Now, I wouldn't go to far as to say that it was the worst movie ever made. But god damn, it was pretty bad and it became so overrated (yes, i consider getting nominated for an Oscar overrated).
The story was just so lame and boring. It even got to the point that V. Woolf was making out with her own sister. Ridiculous!

[Jonte_1979]

61. Depends on the budget we're talking here

If we're talking big budget Hollywood A-list movies, I'd say "Batman & Robin".

Wretched, wretched movie!

[mlawson]

65. Any in which John Wayne starred as a military hero!!

HYPOCRITE!!!!!!!! He dodged the draft in WWII, then look what he did later!

[DODI]

66. Night of the Lepus

Giant rabbits invade a town and then are electrocuted on railroad line. Worst non-horror - The Postman Always Rings Twice.

[disgruntella]

68. do you mean "so bad it's good?"

If so, you have got to see Swarm. Killer bees in Texas with an all-star 70s cast (Michael Caine, Henry Fonda, Patty Duke, ... even Olivia DeHavilland)

It might just be me. But this movie makes "Airplane!" look like a documentary. I actually bought a copy for when I'm feeling down and need a good laugh....

[ozymandius]

69. Killer Clowns From Outer Space

http://www.cinecrap.com/killerclowns.html

A Mini-Review

By Mike Bunch

This film should qualify for an ABSOULTE ASS award, or at least a Golden Dingleberry. This relatively unknown (thank God and everyone else for that) "gem" from 1988 is about about aliens invading a small town, begging the question "Have you ever noticed that aliens always seem to choose Hicksville, USA to invade when they appear in an F- movie?"

The aliens succeed in killing the townspeople as well as any hope for a plot. To top it off, the only people who have a clue about what is happening are some of the town youth. Hmmm... town youth out to save the day, I wonder where they got that little plot idea? The writers must have watch a Corey Haim/Corey Feldman film or something.

To top it off, our heroic youths are driving around in an ice cream truck while trying to save their town and friends. Oh, by the way, did I happen to mention that the aliens resemble really ugly circus clowns and use equally cheesy weapons (this is a stretch, but I bet that is where the title came from)? And that the only way to kill them is to hit them in the nose?

more...

[EFF BrandyWine]

72. Oh yes!

the killer clowns from outer space definitely qualifies as the absolute worst movie I have ever seen. Question I need to ask myself is why I actually watched the whole thing?????

[Blue_Chill]

79. Not only is it bad

but it's on all the time. You can't go a full year without running into this thing.

[Sheet22]

125. How sad.

That anyone else besides me actually suffered through it. That was a ghastly waste of film, time, and effort (not to mention, it only increased my great distaste for clowns).:+ :thumbsdown:

[bluestateguy]

70. Jawbreaker (1998)

Rose McGowan, Rebecca Gayheart: A horrible pile of shit.

[CO Liberal]

71. "The Thing With Two Heads"

Starring Ray Milland and Rosie Grier in the title role.

[Nevernose]

73. Cutthroat Island, or maybe Battlefield Earth

Without the slow-mo, it would have been 35 minutes long. They cut to slow-motion when mounting a horse, at one point when a barrel of fish falls over. Why am I watching a abrrel of fish falling in slow-motion? Am I syupposed to oooh and ahhh at the drama, or the amazing stunt work involved in tipping over barrels of fish? Oh well, at least everyone was vertical...remember Battlefield Earth, where everyone in the theater kind of tiltes their heads to the left or right to follow the diagonal cinematography?

[Forkboy]

75. The American Godzilla

How could they? :puke:

[catpower2000]

77. Oh, yeah, that was a horrendous piece of shit...nt

[catpower2000]

78. The Mummy, The Avengers, Matrix 2, Maid in Manhattan...

and so many, many more.

Cat

[Born_a_Democrat]

80. Battlefield Earth (or maybe Jeepers Creepers)

If you value your eyes do not watch either of these movies EVEN to disprove my statement...

[WoodrowFan]

81. Meet The Folks

Worst movie I ever sat through in a theater! BTW, I loved Moulin Rouge. I used to work 12 hour swing shifts and on night shifts I’d bring in movies to watch. Sitting in the dark, along in a huge room full of computer equipment, I’d bring musicals to watch to keep me awake, or fun SciFi. Moulin Rouge, Buffy episodes (especially “Once More with Feeling.”, episodes of Far Scape, ST:II Khan, etc. kept me awake...... Glad no one was around when I suddenly burst into song.. "PRETTY LADY MARMALARDE!" at o'dark thirty.

[catpower2000]

82. Meet the Parents?

So bad you forgot the name!! :)

Cat

[GOPisEvil]

84. Maybe he meant the silent film from 1927.

;-)

[WoodrowFan]

85. Monthsof Therapy, GONE

All those sessions so i could forget that movie starting with the title, down the tubes!! ARGH!! The black speedo scene!! ARGH MAKE IT STOP!!!!

[catpower2000]

86. Oops, sorry...

Ben Stiller climbing around on a roof, setting things on fire...

:evilgrin:

[Sirius_on]

83. Dumb and Dumberer

The prequel to Dumb and Dumber. It came about a month ago or so and stunk up the box offices so bad they yanked it after 2 weeks.

[newyawker99]

106. Congrats Sirius_on!! 400 posts

:toast:

[ACK]

87. Two weeks notice, and Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back

God, they sucked. Two weeks notice is the prime example of why the romantic comedy genre is pure dreck. Jay and Silent Bob, even as a Kevin Smith fan in general, was sooo bad I had to turn it off about a 1/3 of the way in. Oh god, the horror.

[Pert_UK]

97. Jay & Silent Bob is one of the funniest films in years......

although you do have to appreciate a fairly childish sense of humour.

Me?....I like fart gags and swearing.

:-)

Not as intelligent as Dogma, but SO much better than Chasing Amy which was ruined by some croak-voiced Harpy in the main role....no offence.

P.

[Adenoid_Hynkel]

118. i disagree

kevin smith has lost it. too many cameos. too many sexist jokes. too many recycled jokes from his older movies. mediocre writing.

hard to believe this is the guy who wrote clerks. hollywood corrupted his talent

[Adenoid_Hynkel]

119. varsity blues

not that i thought it would be good. i was forced into the theatre by a friend. i insisted that if i had to watch an mtv-produced film about dumb redneck jock starring a cast member from dawson's creek, she was paying.

not only as bad as i thought--infinitely worse. had a little fun giving the mst3k treatment, though. (obnoxious i know, but i was a drunk college kid)

[Yaoi_Huntress_Earth]

132. I have a feeling

That even if Smith was doing Schindler's List he'd find a way to sneak Jay and Silent Bob in.
Love,
Yaoi Huntress Earth

[sugarcookie]

88. Pluto Nash

I watched the first 20 minutes and couldn'take anymore. Does it get better? If it does I will give it another chance.

[imax2268]

96. Pluto Nash...

Ya know...I actually saw that today...I missed the ending...

Thank God...!

[Uzybone]

89. Magnolia

Im sure there are worse movies out there but this was the worst I have ever sat and watched.

[4_Legs_Good]

120. OMG - NO WAY!!!

Magnolia is, IMO, one of the single best films ever made. It is absofreakinglutely GLORIOUS!

I can't believe anyone would call it the worst of all time. I can understand how some wouldn't like it.

Gah! It's genius, utter genius! P.T. Anderson is my freaking Idol!!!3

Oh well!

david

Kucinich 2004

[LynneSin]

90. I just sat through "Old School" could there be worse?

I mean, I figured it was sick warped humor along the line of 'Road Trip' or 'American Pie'; which I geniunely liked both of those movies. But "Old School" had the worse plot and ruined what could have been an incredible cast (Will Farrell, Luke Wilson and Vince Vaughen).

I can't imagine any movie out there could be worse than "Old School"

[Trajan]

91. But there are SO MANY bad movies .....

How does one select a single star in the entire universe ? ...

The Twilight People .... (a 70's era horror flick that is honestly the WORST movie I have ever seen .... )

Samson and the Wax Museum ... (A mexican film that used to play on late night movie channels regularly: ... Samson is a pro wrestler who wrestles by day AND fights crime by night ! ..... He drives about from bout to crime scene on his MGA sports car .... freekin hilarious .... )

Zardoz ..... (League of Extraordinary Gentleman CANNOT BE this bad ... )

[bif]

92. Mr. Magoo

I was forced to take my kids to see it. It was so bad I cringed through the whole movie. Have to admit, I hated the old tv show too. Making fun of a blind guy. Real funny!

[JustJoe]

94. "Gilgligi" Gets Rave Review

Hollywood Reports - Pomona - August 2, 2003

Byline - Relpa McFuine

"Ggilygyl" (pronounced "pbdmtwf") garnered rave reviews today from
Hollywood insiders and real-life amouras Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez.

"I think Jennifer is a tremendous actress," Affleck said of Lopez. "I don't think people give her enough credit."

Meanwhile, Lopez said that her honey has the chops, too. "I think Ben is amazing onscreen. He's amazing--period."

"I loved us in 'Lgllgyy'," Affleck added. "I couldn't keep my
eyes off of us. I was there when we were making the movie, but
I was so scared and excited wondering what was going to happen next that
I forgot I already knew. I forgot we was the guys in the movie, that's
how good we was."

"I agree one hundred and ten percent," said Lopez. "Go
see it. It's like so fun. If you don't like it,
Ben will send you your money back."

"Gosh darn it!" Affleck said, laughing, "Jen is a cut-up!"

"I don't know," said Lopez, "but we really cut the rug in 'Gggggyl'!
Hey, do the duck, Ben. Ben does the Affleck duck."

"Yeah, sure, huh huh," said Affleck. "No, I do not. That's
not funny. Well, anyway, please, for God's sakes, somebody
go see this frigging movie."

"It's a dilly," said Lopez.

"It's a pickle and a tuna sandwich," Affleck chimed in.

"We love each other like a couple of drunk nuns," said
Lopez, "and there's no reason everybody else shouldn't
either. I play a lesbian hit-man and Ben plays my mother."

"We set off in a schooner on top of bicycle wheels to see what
became of America," explained Affleck.

"But it's exciting, too," said Lopez, "with brains
splattered around, sweaty yoga stretch pants poses, etc."

"If you don't go see it," Affleck said, "I'll come to
your horse and personally--"

"Come to their horse?" asked Lopez.

"Huh?"

"You said 'come to their horse.'"

"No, I didn't, did I? Well, maybe I was thinking of your
big cabooze that makes me feel like a horse in clover!"

"You big bunk hunk! You big bunkhouse!"

"Oh ha ha ha!"

"Ha ha ha ha!"

The two delightful lovers and co-stars of "Llllllllgliy"
excused themselves and went into the broom closet where
they closed the door and began to croon "Cement Mixer,
Putty Putty" to drown out the sounds of their own sexual
intercourse.

It was a day this reporter will never forget, not only
because I saw "Iiiiiiiiiiglyg" myself for free by being
a movie reporter, but because I got to know a
little of the magical mystery tour which is the life and
times of Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez, two people who
in real-life are every bit as interesting as they are on
the big screen. I look forward to living the rest of my
life with them, for I have filed papers for them to
adopt me. I forged their signatures and will hire
look-alikes to go to court to approve it. Then I will
serve them with the adoption papers and move in with
them. Just thinking about it I start to make little
baby noises like "Glouglalalylglug."

[ScreamingMeemie]

95. I forgot "Pumpkinhead"

[Leftist78]

98. I think they're all about to get beat by...

Freddy vs. Jason. :puke: The trailer for that movie was the first time I heard a movie crowd laugh at the IDEA of a movie.

[DrBB]

99. Matrix Reloaded

Dunno if it would win, but it's definitely in the running. I spent half the movie simply cringing.

On t'other hand, rent the Animatrix right away! It's (mostly) terrific.

[PittPoliSci]

100. Igby Goes Down.

Its just how I can't feel any sympathy for a little rich brat who quits school and fucks amanda peet.

other than that I elect movies i have never seen, and never will see.

a Beautiful Mind: I don't give a fuck what this movie is about, it should NOT have won best picture over lord of the rings.

Titanic: just awful. i got the shits half way through this movie that's how bad it was, and thankfully didn't see the rest.

okay, more movies that i've seen and hated.

legally blonde 2. shit-tastic.

chicago. sorry, not as good as gangs of new york or two towers, not deserving of an oscar.

the pianist. adrian brody should not have beaten out daniel day lewis for this oscar either.

[kmla]

107. It has to be "Smokey and the Bandit III",

closely followed by "The Man with One Red Shoe". Both border on unwatchable.

Smokey and the Bandit III was so bad Burt Reynolds would only do a cameo in it. THAT is how bad it was.:puke:

[bmbmd]

108. Along the Burt Reynolds line

How about "The Man From Left Field"?

[skypilot]

111. Kevin Costner flicks

Especially "Revenge" and "Waterworld".

[FlaGranny]

112. Attack of the Killer Tomatoes!!!

Possibly.

[Sheet22]

128. Great Camp!!

I loved that movie just for the whole ridiculousness of it all.
:silly:

[NightTrain]

113. There's no question in my mind!

The absolute worst film ever made, bar none, is that cinematic car crash from 1966, "Manos: The Hands of Fate." It is godawful beyond words!!! :puke:

[ProfessorGAC]

114. I Can Go With Glitter

But, my wife and i really thought Titanic was dreadful beyond words. Treacly script, glacially paced, overacting abounds. . . I couldn't wait for that damn ship to sink.
The Professor

[geniph]

115. Well, I've really hated a lot of movies

among them some that were critically or popularly acclaimed, including:

The Blair Witch Project (oh puh-leeeze! just frigging kill 'em already and make 'em shut UP about the frigging map!)
Independence Day (a coherent script and a bit less jingoism might have helped)
Happiness (just being an unrelieved downer does not make a movie brilliant)
Forrest Gump (ugh. just - ugh. I hate everything about this movie)
The English Patient (possibly the most boring and incomprehensible movie ever made)
Orlando (brilliant acting. What is the point of the movie?)
The Piano Teacher (WTF was THAT mess all about? Who on earth thought this was a good idea for a movie?)
Showgirls (pretty bad when you have that much bare supermodel skin and it isn't even titillating)

so many bad movies, so little time to review them...

[ArkDem]

116. Car Wash

.

[4_Legs_Good]

121. 15 Minutes

was the last movie I remember really hating. Nothing's worse than having Bobby DeNiro waste his talent.

david

Kucinich 2004

[Oracle]

122. Moment by Moment

John Travota & Lily Thomlin

[Maccagirl]

130. OMG Yes!

Travolta's character's name was Strip for gawd's sake.

[Oracle]

123. The Oscar!

1968 Stephen Boyd

[Oracle]

124. Glitter!

Bubblehead.

[Sheet22]

126. I have to vote for........

"Stigmata" I actually fell asleep towards the end. I thought it was ghastly and such a waste of a talent such as Gabriel Byrne.

[4_Legs_Good]

129. *cheer*

After I entered my opinion, I remembered this bomb.

I actually liked the MTV cinematography a bit, but the film itself stunk-deluxe. The writers had no idea what they were talking about, and it was so completely intolerant of Catholics that it made me ill.

david

Kucinich 2004

[Lurking Dem]

131. Darkly Noon

I still haven't figured out the floating shoe thing.

Nor, I think, do I want to.

[jayfish]

133. Gods And Generals.

I just watched half of it last night. I couldn't believe that this was a Ted Turner financed film and used his real name. While I cannot vouch for the historical accuracy of the battle scenes (which in and of themselves sucked), I’ve never seen such a revisionist, apologist portrayal of the issue of and attitudes about slavery as contrasted between the Union and the confederacy. Even though I knew who the characters were as I watched, the damn movie actually had me confused, on several occasions, as to who was the North and who was the South. And the acting was absolutely atrocious. When they did recite something that was historically accurate, I swear that there was a guy, off camera, who was holding a history book up for the actors to read. It was like bad Shakespeare. The only plus for this dud is the (when not CGI) cinematography. The Virginia countryside is very nice to look at and brought back fond memories of when I lived there. I really like long movies but I could only stomach half of this one in one sitting and am seriously wondering if the second half is worth my time. They should have slapped a confederate flag on the box and called this one "We Were The Good Guys".

Jay

-Edited For Content-

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

135. Ishtar and a movie called "Walker"

Walker was made during the Reagan administration's covert war with Nicaragua. It was about a U.S. mercenary who took over Nicaragua and restored slavery in the 1850's with financial support from the Vanderbilt family. The guy's first name escapes me.

I guess the movie was supposed to elicit opposition for Nicaraguan intervention but was nothing but a conglomeration of dumb jokes. Very painful to watch. Gave up halfway through the movie.

[RetroLounge]

136. Cabin Boy

Chris Elliot...