a blatant post about indelicacy and those who are 'messy, perverted'

[short bus president]

Hah! You were expecting me to say "vibrating pocket pussy," weren't you? Not tonight. No Sir. Tonight we begin anew.

We're moving on, leaving the plastic pussy of the past behind. Our future direction must be guided by wisdom, fancy electronic gizmos, and the spirit of a departed sewage treatment plant worker named Elmo. No longer shall we shoulder the burden of indignant toe-biting! Not for us! We are the children of multiple-level high carbon steel woks! We are unrivaled in our Caprices and Malibus! Hail, the victorious denoters of beef!

[Interrobang]

1. I give you four computers...

...for the messy electronic revolution, and six teledildonic attachments. Vibrating exstacy and churlish rock music provides an ample soundtrack for my messy anarcho-syndicalist fantasies. We shall overfulfil the toilet paper production quota of history, and reboot the disco music mania of the glorious new century. We shall shout it from the roofs of synagogues, carol it in church belfries, and provide it free-of-charge at handy drive-thru windows, consult your local listings. I control the telephonic wisdom of the ages, I am the favoured daughter of Ma Bell, and I proclaim myself the lusty codec goddess of the electronic insurgency!

Bring on the tepid forces of serial monogamy and torpid morality! We shall defeat them with a humming grace-note of payphone plurality! Keep the red wires flying here!