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Is it possible for a person to just fail to thrive and just have an inborn death wish?

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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-01-07 09:22 AM
Original message
Is it possible for a person to just fail to thrive and just have an inborn death wish?
my neighbor's kid is in some serious trouble...

he is in 4th grade and he is so weak...that he can barely hold a pencil..

he won't eat and she tries everything to feed him...he looks like a thin and pasty elf...

he can speaks at whisper tones and is really out of it....

we live near Pittsburgh and so this kid has been to specialists at Children's Hospital...and they can't figure out what is going on with him...

But...it is clear he needs to eat or he is going to waste away...

I can't help but wonder what would cause a child not to want to eat...

This woman has two other kids who are healthy and normal weight...and she is going nuts trying to feed him and keep him eating until he gains some strength...

Hell he came over to my house once and I clandestinely kept offering him stuff as I fed my kids snacks...(very casual..) and he would eat nothing...not even junk food...and hell...I can't even wrap my mind around a kid who refuses a brownie...





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MissMillie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-01-07 09:33 AM
Response to Original message
1. I imagine that it is indeed possible
but it sounds a lot like depression to me. (of course, this kid has seen a lot of specialists and if they haven't made that diagnosis, who am I to make it?)
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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-01-07 09:42 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. it is just hard to watch....
he makes me nervous...

I volunteered to take him and one of siblings to a roller rink...and jesus....his ankles were so small that I was fearful I would break his leg if I tried to force his foot into the skate...I couldn't bear to watch him skate....but he made it...and I delivered him back home safely....

but he eats very very little and his mom is telling me that he is actually losing strength lately...
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Lars39 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-01-07 09:52 AM
Response to Original message
3. I met a woman at the playground once that had a baby that had
been labelled 'failure to thrive'. :(
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-01-07 09:54 AM
Response to Original message
4. If that child were my patient, I would have had him admitted
and have a GI tube inserted.

Then, I would try to get to the bottom of this. Is it possible that he has an underlying disorder like celiac? or IBS? Maybe the digestion process is so uncomfortable for him that he would rather not eat.

Whatever it is, I would definitely have him hospitalized. Committed even if necessary.
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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-01-07 10:11 AM
Response to Reply #4
6. i don't know why that has not happened yet
if it were my kid he would have been in the hospital until they figured out why he wasn't eating and only released after he gained some weight...
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supernova Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-01-07 10:07 AM
Response to Original message
5. Depression and/or eating disorder
Obviously, it's a food hang-up. Suicidally depressed?

But yeah, like Midlo, I'd have him hospitalized. He's a boy. He should be eating his parents and you out of house and home. :-(
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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-01-07 10:14 AM
Response to Reply #5
7. my son is a few months younger than this kid and he is an active kid
and my son is healthy and fit...and he eats and eats and eats...and then burns it off with his activities...
my son (who is skinny like his dad) looks like a line backer next to this boy...
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LaurenG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-01-07 10:19 AM
Response to Original message
8. There is something medically wrong
that hasn't been picked up. I know there is a disorder that involves the lack of an enzyme needed to make L carnitine in the digestive tract that sometimes causes symptoms like this. Poor kid and poor mom. I hope they can figure out what's up soon.

:-(
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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-01-07 10:25 AM
Response to Reply #8
9. I think the mother is depressed as a result of this entire ordeal
and I think it is messing with her marriage as well...

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rug Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-01-07 12:23 PM
Response to Original message
10. Sounds like a young Bartleby.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bartleby_the_Scrivener

When his business increases, he decides to hire a third scrivener, and Bartleby responds to his advertisement and arrives at the office, "pallidly neat, pitiably respectable, incurably forlorn!"

At first Bartleby copies diligently, but declines to perform other duties, telling his perplexed boss "I would prefer not to" when asked, for example, to help the other scriveners proofread a document. Later, he stops working altogether, repeating only "I would prefer not to" when pressed for an explanation. (Although many people err in the wording here, it should be noted that Bartleby never actually refuses; he just states he would prefer not to. At one point, when his boss declares angrily "You will not?" he gently replies "I prefer not.")

The narrator, torn between pity and exasperation, also discovers that Bartleby apparently has no home or friends, and lives in the office. Reluctant to dismiss the man, but nettled by what he perceives as his "pallid haughtiness", he tries to persuade him to resume work, or to at least explain himself. Bartleby, however, only repeats his mantra, and the narrator eventually fires him. Bartleby, however, continues to haunt the premises, causing the lawyer considerable embarrassment. Unwilling to have him arrested, the narrator finally moves his offices to escape his presence.

The new tenants, however, soon track him down to complain of the strange man he left behind. Although he protests that Bartleby is nothing to him, he agrees to go speak with him. During the interview, he tries once more to help the young man, even inviting him to be a guest in his own home. Bartleby, however, replies "No: at present, I prefer not to make any change at all." He will not even accept money from the narrator. The new tenants have Bartleby arrested for vagrancy, and he is sent to The Tombs.

When the narrator visits the prison, Bartleby tells him "I know you--and I want nothing to say to you." Nevertheless, he tries to cheer him, and gives the "grub man" a sum of money to provide him with better meals. However, Bartleby "prefers not" to eat, and slowly starves, finally expiring just prior to another visit from the narrator. At the end, the lawyer speculates that Bartleby's rumored previous career in the dead letter office in Washington, D.C., which was sad and depressing, drove him to his bizarre behavior.

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