|
Edited on Thu Jun-07-07 11:01 AM by Deep13
Washington--BSP
The Religious Right was shocked to learn that Congressional liberals vanished in the blink of an eye leaving neatly folded suits in their place. Many Evangelicals expressed dismay they were "left behind." Around 1:30 p.m. EDT during a House Oversight Committee Meeting witnesses from the Justice Department were testifying to Henry Waxman (D-CA) about the U.S. attorney firings when suddenly they were looking at an empty chair. On the other side of the building Sen. Sam Brownback (R-KA) was explaining that Sept. 11 justifies U.S. actions in Iraq when he noticed that Leahy, Boxer, Kennedy and others were missing. "I was particularly shocked that the Lord chose someone responsible for killing Him," Brownback said about Feingold. House Republicans were similarly confused about the disappearance of Barney Frank (D-MA) when his fabulous suit was found folded on his House seat.
Many Evangelical leaders were in disbelief that they were rejected after being so holy. Ralph Reed noted that the Rapture came like a thief in the night. "We were robbed," he said. Pat Robertson said from his padded cell something completely incomprehensible about a lake of fire. Christian enthusiast Kirk Cameron, stunned, did not answer questions but sucked on a peanut-butter covered banana while watching reruns of Full House. Jesus Christ, Lord and Savior, having returned to Earth was seen in Baltimore. When asked for a quote, He simply said the rejection of the conservatives must seem like an inconvenient truth and that He was going to put all sin in a "lock box."
|