How do you get back at a coworker that hates you?

[Lostmessage]

I have been working with this woman for 3 years and she hates me. We are both artists and we both have our quirks but she tries to make my life miserable along with her group of catty friends.
I get along more with the guys then I do with the women in our office.
When I first started as a graphic artist she spread a rumor around the place that I was a lesbian and It didn't bother me because all I want to do is work and get paid and I am not there to pick up a date.
The company hired a gorgeous man and he started talking to me and they all told him that I was a lesbian which wasn't true so I asked him out on a date and I paid for it and he found out about their bull shit. They are now spreading rumors around that he is gay and the only reason that he went out with me is because we went out on the town to bar hop the gay bars.
I have applied for two other jobs because I am sick of the bitches.
I would like to send these women a going away gift of a subscription to AARP. They are all in their late 40's and I am almost 40.
Should I send them a subscription to AARP or can someone make a suggestion of what I should give them as a going away present.
I will never know why they hate me and I want to ask them why. I could improve myself If I am doing something wrong If I knew the real reasons. The older woman of the bunch that started all of the rumors might do this to someone else and I would like to talk to her about the last 3 years of hell that I have gone through because of her insecurities. Should I confront them on my last day at work.

[salinen]

1. With the way you describe them

you should be more worried if they liked you.

[Lostmessage]

3. They have problems

They can't let their hate for me go and I haven't done anything to them. Come to think about it none of them are married either except for the older one with gray hair that started all of the trouble.

[pacifictiger]

10. call them on it

to their face with humor if you can find a way to do it. Don't let them deplete your creative energy with intimidation - they probably are trying to take you down a notch because they fear or resent you in some way because of their own inadequacies - people with low self esteem will try to bring others down to make them feel big. Take the high road, realize the bitchiness is solely their problem and that it will, as night follows day, come back to bite them in the butt. Call back your spirit from their negativity and make your creative art an outlet for any frustration you feel. When its time to move on, the perfect job will be there for you. The pearl does not get to be beautiful without a little irritation along the way.

[Supply Side Jesus]

2. plant drugs in their desk

thats one sure fire way to get rid of her. BUT.....
If you dont like that, then document incidents and dont be afraid to wear a wire and record any confrontations. When enough is piled up take action.

[Lostmessage]

4. I don't dress up to go to work

I am a plain person and I don't even carry a purse because I have been robbed before. She asked me if i had any pictures of my nieces and nephews in my wallet one day and I don't own a wallet.

[CandyCrim21]

17. What are drugs???!!!!!

:shrug: I grew up in a small town! Coffee is a drug to me.

[peacefreak]

5. Take the high road

obviously they are threatened by you--your talent, intelligence, your age. Maybe they look at you & see opportunities they've missed. If you are able to land a new job, that's another thing they'll be pissed about. You got out & they're still stuck in the same place.
If the high road doesn't do it for you, send them samples of Depends! :evilgrin:

[Lostmessage]

6. I want to enroll her in AARP

:evilgrin:

[rbnyc]

7. Ignore them.

They sound like idiots. Don't honor their BS by worrying about it or responding. Just do your thing. Good people will be able to figure out what's what and who's who. Don't give it any more energy.

[Lostmessage]

9. I liked the men that I worked with

I will miss them immensely and I hope that they leave the guy that I went out with alone.

[callous taoboy]

8. I think it was Ed Abbey

who stated that people who have no enemies make him suspicious.

[Parrcrow]

11. If their accusations create a climate of hostility

for you and your friend, or are even intended to, your sexual orientation is irrelevent, its sexual harrassment.

fry 'em

[SoCalDem]

12. Do great work, treat them extra nice..

It will drive them nuts:)

[Southsideirish]

19. "The key to a happy life is a short memory" (Ingrid Bergman)

As much as it kills you - the above post is very good advice. It may seem wimpy when your every inclination is to be angry as hell and want revenge but follow that advice and it will get you through a bad situation.

[buckeye1]

13. chicken bones

put them in their coat pockets or purse. it works well.

[earthman dave]

14. Nothing says "piss off" quite like a headbutt

If you're leaving anyway... :)

[Lostmessage]

15. I am going to dress up on my last day of work

Mini shirt, stockings, garters and candies shoes.

Then I am going to take the guys out on the town for the night.

[Lostmessage]

16. Anytime they see something out of place or even in place

They say * did it or it looks like * work and its wrong why don't you fire her.

[Cleita]

18. Don't you have a supervisor you can take this too?

Spreading rumors that are lies shouldn't be allowed in the workplace. Office politics aside, smearing your reputation and that of your co-worker is going beyond a few catty remarks. What will they say next? It's not a matter to be taken lightly.

[CandyCrim21]

20. Uh YEAH!

I'm sorry but I would have called these bitches on their bull shit a long time ago. Three years is WAY to long to let something like this go. Don't quit your job because of this bullshit. Why should you have to go? Fuck that! Confronting them at work could be touchy unless you have someone with you that knows whats going on. I'd try going to management first. Seriously, tell them that your not trying to make a mountain out of a mo hill but that your sick of this shit and you want it to be resolved so that you don't have to seek employment elsewhere. Obviously these bitches are seriously insecure and most likely they envy you for some reason or another, you know how misery loves company? Trust me, it does. Tell your boss that you are a professional and thats why you chosen to passify it until now and that you've just had it. Tell him that you'd like to maybe set up a meeting between all of you to find out what the problem is so that you all can resolve it and go on with your lives. Sounds like something you'd do to a bunch of high school kids but fuck it! I personally wouldn't roll over for that shit. Good luck.:grr:

[creativelcro]

21. I guess one easy way is to give out their e-mails to

a bunch of shady companies, you know? cheap viagra, that kind of stuff... Mountains of spam will start flowing in...

[areschild]

22. Since they're so catty,

give them a can of cat food...

[slappypan]

23. yeah, we have some hags like that in the office where I work

That type of stuff is just so beneath your notice. Don't even dignify it with a response. Just try to excell at what you do and don't give them the satisfaction of playing their game. In my experience, office gossips are invariably losers with a poor work ethic who are very frustrated with their careers. Usually the first to be laid off when there are cutbacks.

[BlackVelvetElvis]

24. In their late 40's? They sound like middle schoolers

What a bunch of immature crap.
Where's the boss? This should never be tolerated.
Personally, I'd tell the boss about the situation then I'd confront the culprits.

[davsand]

25. I guess I'm too evil! I'd do something like...

...signing them all up for lesbian porn sites with their work email addys. Hell, if you are kind, get them a subscription to Lambda--that is a great magazine, but it would broaden their views a bit, I'm sure.

Maybe I'd be bitchy enough to have a case of dildos delivered to them all at work--or maybe just one REALLY big one for each one. Buy them all vibrators and gift wrap them and give them out on your last day...

Give them all huge bottles of lube with a note suggesting that since they are dried up old hags maybe they need it.

Barring that, I'd invite a good friend in and lay a big old kiss on her and then turn around and blow them all kisses...

Fuck anybody who meddles in my life like that is my attitude.

Sorry, I'm probably the wrong one to advise you on the issue of people who deserve to get the snot smacked outta them.

[fudge stripe cookays]

26. Buy one of those books by...

George Hayduke about revenge.

That man has got some REAL zingers.

Some that I really liked are:

1. Finding out where they live, putting ads in the local paper for "GARAGE SALE! Everything must go! Start 6:30 AM Saturday!"

Or

2. Buy this substance, I forget what it's called...it hardens to a clear glasslike coating and is IMPOSSIBLE to remove. He suggests barfing or pooping into a container with that stuff then dumping it on the person's windshield. It takes a professional auto glass person to replace.

Here's my contribution:
At my old apartment my last semester of college, I had neighbors above AND next door who were complete assholes! One was a single mother with bratty pre-teens who were constantly trying pranks on me-- the others lived upstairs and constantly played loud music or wrassled around when I was trying to a) sleep or b) study.

The day I moved out, and we had everything all packed up and loaded into the moving van with the engine running, I ran up to both of their doors, and left little gifties for them. In pretty little gift bags, I'd left the last dregs of my cat's litter box, pre-move cleanup, and a letter detailing what complete fuckwads they were. My mother still laughs and calls me a chip off the old block.

Of course, the only reason I know anything about these books is because I used to date someone for whom only the word "Evil" is strong enough.

Good luck!
FSC

[DS1]

27. Office Ninja

http://www.theonion.com/onion3535/disgruntled_ninja.html

[notadmblnd]

28. tape a raw fish to the underside of their desk drawers

it will take them forever to find them and will stink terrible.

[rustydog]

29. File a discriminatory harassment complaint with the company

First, you should confront the person and tell her to stop the comments.
If she doesn't stop, you file your complaint.

The company has to investigate the claim, by law or face fines.
the offender should be suspended, pending investigation, and if the investigation reveals that your claims are true, the offender should be fired.
If not, the state can fine your employer. it is illegal to make comments, true or not, about a persons sexual persuasion, orientation, religion, weight, physical handicaps etc.