Is it bad to pretend to be decisive about stuff you don't have a preference for?

[Solon]

You a probably wondering what the hell I'm talking about, but anyways, I'll give an example, about 2 weeks ago was grocery shopping with a woman, and she asked which type of garlic bread I liked, with or without cheese. Honestly, I had no preference, and told her so, I mean that quite literally, I would be equally happy with either one. So she gets mad at me for not telling her which one to pick, so, to stave off a fight, I just blurted out that I wanted cheese.

I think my problem is that I'm so laid back about so many things, and eclectic to boot, that its hard for me to actually feel strongly about "little stuff" like this. I'm just wondering if pretending to have such preferences is somehow wrong.

[CreekDog]

1. no

[ThomCat]

2. That's one of the many bad things about market research.

They insist that people must prefer something, and that something is always a sellable product.

[CreekDog]

3. yes

[Solon]

7. OK, so which is it, dammit!

:P

[CreekDog]

8. i don't care

unless you want me to just pretend to have a preference ;)

[Solon]

10. Well played sir, well played...

I think now, I have no strong feelings one way or the other as to whether your opinion matters.

:P

[CreekDog]

12. okay, he's got me there

:rofl:

[Blue-Jay]

4. "Cheese" was the correct answer.

[Inchworm]

16. I agree

:D

[Reverend_Smitty]

5. I have that problem too...

I tend not to sweat the small stuff in life so when I say I don't care, people take my indifference as an insult. Which it is not, I would be equally happy with either choice really so I just tend to pick whatever somebody says last just to prevent the problem you described.

[Solon]

9. Exactly, the indifference is taken as an insult, when it isn't meant that way...

Its actually easier to tell people what I don't like, for example, most modern Country music and Peas, actually I think that's about it. Other than that, I don't have a preferences about a whole lot of stuff, come to think of it, I just don't feel strongly enough to even have that many favorites.

[CreekDog]

6. if you don't care you might get caught not remembering your *fake* preference

and women have a way better memory. and believe me, it will occur to her that if you lie about this, you are lying about bigger things.

oh yeah.

but just because you don't have a preference, doesn't mean you have to be all Woody Allen about it.

[Solon]

11. The thing is that I didn't lie, at least initially...

its not like I said that having cheese on garlic bread is the best thing ever or anything. I told her I didn't care, and she took offense, so I chose one or the other.

[CreekDog]

14. when you say you "don't care"

they see that as passive aggressive. you say, well i don't have a preference, but i'm going to pick this one because i think you will like it.

:hug:

and then she will think, "awww, what a nice guy"

and then go out with the biker dude that doesn't need her.

[Richard Steele]

13. No way: that's the BEST stuff to act "decisive" about!

Only the SITH deals in absolutes, donchaknow...

So, when you find yourself backed into a "either/or" corner
over something you TRULY don't care about...
That's your chance to HAM IT UP!

Look them in the eye, speak in a clear firm tone,
and express a PREFERENCE like you're ringing the
fricking bells at St. Mary's!!!!!!


It's great fun. I recommend it highly.


Richard

[Schema Thing]

15. I feel your pain

It's not like I don't have strong opinions, but part of being a good comparison-monkey is realizing that not everything has to be rated *against* something else.

[TreasonousBastard]

17. Without knowing what your relationship with this woman is,...

I'll say that it's her problem and foisting her decision on you is highly unfair. If she's pissed because she can't make up her own mind, so be it.

Of course, you might be in such a position that leaving her in this pissed-off state is not the best course for either of you. In that case, I would rely on some excellent Jewish thought on the matter of when little white lies would axctually be required. I believe even Maimonedes himself advised that inventing a truth on such small things to keep the peace is an honorable approach.

[Callalily]

18. It's too bad that your

friend made you feel like you had to choose. Little stuff like this certainly doesn't matter. Personally, I prefer to expend my energies on more important issues.

Good luck!

[DarkTirade]

19. Maybe you should learn to simulate a coin flip in your head. :)

[MissMillie]

20. well, if you made her happy

and it truly didn't matter to you, then no, it wasn't wrong.

[redqueen]

21. Not if it makes unreasonably grouchy people shut up.

:P