Man Tries To Jump Pond In Buick - Fails - Ends Up In Jail

[matcom]

<snip>

SHERIDAN, Wyo. -- A man who drove an old car into a pond in a failed attempt to jump over it, Evel Knievel-style, has been sentenced to 270 days in jail.

Wayland Justin Williams, 24, of Sheridan, pleaded guilty Tuesday to property destruction, dispensing an offensive matter in a pond and abandoning a motor vehicle on state land.

Circuit Judge John Sampson fined him $690. For driving through a fence, Williams must also pay $200 to a rancher who holds a state permit to graze livestock on the land.

According to court documents, Williams polluted the bass pond with oil and gasoline when he drove the old Buick into it.

States the Sheridan County sheriff's report: "Wayland claimed he had tried to jump the pond with the green Buick, and that he would have made it had he built a ramp."

http://www.boston.com/news/odd/articles/2004/02/04/wyo_man_sentenced_for_failed_pond_jump/

[GOPisEvil]

1. Famous last words: "Hey y'all, watch this!"

Applications for the position of Evel Kneivel are closed, seeing as how he's still alive. Moran!

[underpants]

3. File under:Seemed like a good idea at the time

:bounce:

[underpants]

2. Just a good ole boy...never meaning no harm....

"...he would have made it had he built a ramp."

[GOPisEvil]

4. Quote from Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane

"It's also nice to see a severe punishment for damaging our state lands. This will be a message to the rest of the public, and hopefully we can get better care of our state lands," he said.

He added, "We got dem Duke Boys (laughs)."

[underpants]

6. Gootch gootch gootch cuff 'em 'n' stuff 'em

:bounce:

[Gman]

5. Here, hol' muh beer.

watch this!

[Aristus]

7. One year from now:

"Hey there, Wayland. Gotcha a new cellmate. Name's Dick. Stop snickerin' 'n' be nice. He's got hisself a bad heart. He's in a heap o' trouble with the new Prezdint."