Crazy fundie Catholic aunt sends check for Christmas--conundrum!

[MorningGlow]

Okay, so my aunt, who I call a crazy fundie Catholic because she's Roman Catholic but militant like your basic Baptist fundie nutjob (not disparaging Catholics or Baptists here--just the nutjobs who feel their religion must be foisted on everyone else), sent a Christmas card with a fairly sizable check.

Her "P.S." in the card said, "Remember, JESUS is the reason for the season!" :banghead:

Conundrum: Does depositing the check (and saying thank you) imply some sort of agreement that we will start being Catholic and going to church and raising MG Jr. as a good Catholic boy? Legal scholars, can we have a ruling here?

[Rabrrrrrr]

1. No, there is no such agreement.

Accept it as an act of love. Even if she might secretly be trying to use it as a bribe, just assume it's a gift of love and cash it and enjoy it.

[MorningGlow]

14. Bribe, threat, whatever

I just talked to my mom (her sister), and she said at least I just got away with a note and a check. Apparently my aunt has been telling my mom that she's "running out of time" (to get right with God or something). YIKES. (My mom answered, "So I'll just be joining ma and pa in hell then?" as my grandparents never went to church either. Good one mom!)

[LeftyMom]

2. Sounds like my old boss.

Turned out the woman was about eighteen kinds of crooked.

Seems to be a running theme with people who can't shut up about how holy they are.

[MorningGlow]

16. I just want to know

Whatever happened to "judge not lest ye be judged"? The God Squad always seems to forget that part of the bible.

[tigereye]

34. exactly

if you have to flaunt it, you ain't got it....

[Pierre.Suave]

39. agreed

"Thou protesteth too loudly"

Shakespeare was on to something when he said that.

[Whoa_Nelly]

3. A gift is a gift--once given, the giver has no say what the recipient chooses to do with it

So Sayeth Whoa_Nelly

[MorningGlow]

15. A-men and So Mote It Be

I like the Church of Whoa_Nelly. :hi:

[AllegroRondo]

4. No. Legally there is no obligation.

Just like writing "paid in full" on the comment line of a check does not obligate the person cashing it to consider an entire debt paid.

[supernova]

5. No, enjoy the $$ for MG jr

and leave the nutjob stuff to your aunt.

Accept it in the spirit in which it was given.

[MorningGlow]

17. Hey, there's an idea

I think I'll deposit it in MG Jr.'s savings account--we just opened one to have a place to put birthday and Christmas money gifts. That's a good compromise!

[supernova]

24. Perfect!

:thumbsup:

[jakefrep]

6. Use the proceeds to buy her a copy of "The Golden Compass"

And send her a holiday greeting saying something to the effect of: "May you feel the loving embrace of the Flying Spaghetti Monster's noodly appendages"

[MorningGlow]

26. Augh, I'm waiting for that conversation at Christmas dinner

I just KNOW she's going to bring up the movie. I just KNOW it. The only good thing is the whole family has learned not to feed the beast--we just ignore her attempts to bring up incendiary topics. Her comments land with a thud while we talk about other things.

[tigereye]

37. it's unfortunate, since the RC church I was raised in

was not anti-intellectual - it was open to all kinds of debate and questioning. :( Asking questions never destroys real faith.


I think the Catholic Defense league or whatever it is called is waaay full of crap. :grr:

[MorningGlow]

38. I find it interesting

that the Catholic Church has been stressing that the Catholic League (or whatever it's called) "is not affiliated with the Catholic Church". Translation: "They too crazy for us!"

[tigereye]

41. yeah most of the priests I knew as a kid were thoughtful kind men

who loved a good discussion.


The local Catholic paper had a more nuanced view of the film, I think. Actually, the church should be more worried about the view of the church in Dan SImmon's Hyperion novels if they are ever made into films... (they are wonderful books if you like sci-fi.) That perspective on the church is much worse in some ways than the Magisterium...

:hi:

[Javaman]

7. donate it to a pro-choice foundation. :) nt

[MorningGlow]

18. !

:rofl:

[Arugula Latte]

8. Take her money and thank her with a Solstice card. Solstice is the true Reason for the Season.

(Xianity is a Johnny Come Lately stealing all the good holidays and ruining them.)

Look at it this way -- You'll cash her check and some rightwing nutjob group like the Catholic League (featuring rightwing whackjob Phil Donohue) won't get that particular $$. :evilgrin:

[MorningGlow]

23. I just tried explaining that to my mom

She got completely confounded by the idea. So many people just don't think about it. I even kept it simple--just said that if shepherds were watching their flocks in the fields, it was spring, not winter. And a census taken at that time would have been done in spring as well. So Jesus was born around March, not December. I explained about how the early Christian church used to step on previous holidays, in this case the solstice, as a way to ease pagans into converting.

Total confusion.

I told her how nearly every sabbat has been squashed by a Christian holiday: Yule/Christmas; Imbolc/Candlemas; Ostara/Easter; Beltane/May Day; Halloween/All Saints Day. The only ones they left alone were the summer solstice and the fall equinox, although I think they're saints' days that have fallen by the wayside.

Still nuthin'.

So finally I burst out, "Ever seen a Christmas tree in Jerusalem? What in the world does that have to do with Jesus?"

I THINK the penny finally dropped, but you never know. And my mom is the cool one in the family!
:banghead:

[ThomCat]

9. Gifts come with no obligations except good manners.

:)

[Gen. Jack D. Ripper]

10. Use it to buy booze and condoms

[Lil Missy]

11. No, just cash the check and consider it a good gesture on her part.

[GreenPartyVoter]

12. No win situation. Don't take the money and she will be hurt and complain. Do take it and she may

feel that entitles her to put her oar in at times.

At least under scenario 2 you has teh monies, right? And maybe, just maybe there are no strings attached anyway. :hi:

[MorningGlow]

28. Exactly

But at least she's afraid of Mr. MG, so she's not as bold as she'd like to be.

We do have teh monies indeed--and I've decided to deposit it in MG Jr.'s savings account. Then I won't consider it tainted!

[GreenPartyVoter]

35. Perfect solution! :^D

[Kajsa]

13. Don't worry about it.

It's your gift- enjoy it.

It would be nice to thank her for it,
but you don't need to feel obligated beyond that.

She's just making her point- let her
and enjoy your gift.

My Repub brother " makes his point" several times
a week in his e-mails. I just delete them and they
are never mentioned.

Once In a while he sends a winner like the story of
a whale, stuck in fishing nets who when set free,
"thanked" her rescuers. It's beautiful.

I'll see if I can find it.
_________________________ Later- Edit.

I can't attach his e-mail without everyone's address showing.
I did find this snopes reference to the story.

http://www.snopes.com/critters/crusader/whalethanks.asp

It's true!
;-)

[MorningGlow]

36. OMG what a great story!

Aren't whales (and dolphins) the most intelligent mammals on the planet? So why wouldn't the whale say thank you?

When I was in California a number of years ago I saw dolphins join some surfers--they were jumping the waves right next to them, and I knew without a doubt they were playing. It was obvious.

Anyway, thanks so much for the link to that story! I'm going to send it to a few friends who can appreciate it. :hi:

[Kajsa]

43. You're welcome, MorningGlow.

Yes, they are incredibly intelligent.
Dolphins ride the waves right next
to the human surfers. ;-)

I'm glad you liked it.

:hi:

[Bake]

19. I'm a lawyer. No agreement. Cash it.

Enjoy.

Bake

[MorningGlow]

29. Coo'

The law is on my side! Thanks! :hi:

[Tommy_Carcetti]

20. Technically she's right....

But points off for the annoying, in-your-face cliche.

My advice is not to lose sleep over such a frivilous thing.

[MorningGlow]

25. Weelll...

Technically she's wrong--Jesus was born in March and this holiday once was YULE, baby! (See upthread for my rant on Christian sabbat-squashing.) But you are right--use of a cliche did get under my skin.

[Tektonik]

27. She's right except for the fact that Jesus was not born in December

Scripture suggests Jesus was born in the late late summer or the fall.

The reason Christmas exists at this date is because of a long history of pagan holidays and festivals around this time. So in order to make the celebration of Jesus' birth more popular, his birth date was pegged to the time of already popular holidays.

So she's wrong.

[Kutjara]

21. Cash it, but write in the "comment" line:

"for Satanic sundries."

That'll bake her noodle when she's balancing her checkbook at the end of January.

[MorningGlow]

30. LOVE it!

She'll believe it, too! (Most of the time she thinks I'm going straight to hell. Once in a while she'll try to save me.)

[AngryOldDem]

22. Not at all.

But if keeping the money bothers you, donate it to the charity of your choice. Sending it back, however tempting that might be to you, is not really an option.

[MorningGlow]

31. That's for sure

She'd freak if we sent it back, although I know Mr. MG would want to do that. I've decided to deposit it in MG Jr.'s savings account. A fair compromise.

[Shakespeare]

32. I think you have a very generous aunt, regardless of her religious preferences.

Wish I had an aunt who sent me Christmas checks! :hi:

[tigereye]

33. no, I think you are cool

but she really shouldn't be putting religious conditions on the $, IMO. ;)


I remember when Catholics didn't used to be militant - well, except in their overseas missionary zeal. (I can say that since I was raised Catholic, and my uncle was a really cool progresive missionary priest in Korea.)

[MorningGlow]

40. She's an odd mix

When I was little, she wasn't very religious. She was the "most Catholic" person in the family, but her husband tempered her. He was a GREAT guy. When he died, she should have had grief counseling, but she didn't (just visits from a nun and some chats with her priest), and she channeled all of her anger into loving Limbaugh, Hannity, and O'Reilly, and she started getting weird about religion. I actually find it pretty sad.

[tigereye]

42. it's odd how religion is taken to emotional extremes sometimes

almost as a buffer against so many aspects of reality. There seems to be a fine line sometimes between comfort and faith, and rigid acceptance of doctrine...

I always thought of the church as pretty tolerant, prior to my going to college and becoming a feminist! :rofl: