Your house is haunted...what do you do?

[Khephra]

I think this is going to end up entertainment thread day in the Lounge. I haven't had much time to post, so what the hell :shrug: As long as others are playing along. ;-)

[TXlib]

1. GET OUT!

[CatWoman]

30. HAUL ASS!!!!

Watch that terminology, TXLib

[Loonman]

2. Document, document, document

Written accounts, taken in 5 minute increments, digital camera, cam-corder, DAT or other digital audio recording media.

Also good to have a EMF detector and a laser temperature gauge that can do both surface and ambient temperature reading.

An open mind helps, too.

[jus_the_facts]

17. "....I waaaaannnaaa BE....ANARCHY!!"

...."I dunno what I want....buuuut I know how to get it!!" :evilgrin:





:hi:

[underpants]

3. Ghostbusters!

Do do do da doodoodoo

[Misinformed01]

35. Cause bustin' makes me feel good!!

I was glad to see someone else saw this and thought, "Who ya gonna call?"

[Khephra]

4. I think I'd find a short psychic woman

That always seems to help.

;-)

[jus_the_facts]

23. Tangina says....."THIS HOUSE IS CLEAN!"

[darkstar]

5. Take refuge in a large, secure facility

such as a hospital....

[terrya]

6. Get to know your ghosts.

I think ghosts have gotten a bad rap.

Terry

[kmla]

7. Hmmm. Lemme think....

In this order -

1. Soil myself.
2. Faint.
3. Run away like a grammar teacher at a GW Bush press conference.
4. Brag to my friends how "I kicked that ghost's undead ass!"

[Az]

8. Find out where the kids are

Cuz the are probably up to no good.

[DrWeird]

9. Don't tell the kids.

When we were kids we lived in a house my mom was apparently convinced was haunted. She says the dresser drawers would open and close themselves in the middle of the night. She didn't tell me until years later. Probably because I had to sleep with the light on for months after seeing Ghostbusters.

Thanks, mom.

[ret5hd]

10. Advertise and charge admission...

hey, i might be a socialist, but i ain't anti-capitalist

on edit:
and in this case, the "means of production" are already expired.

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

11. It depends

does the ghost bother you or not? Is the ghost doing destructive things? Or is it just around, a bit creepy and startling but not doing you physical harm?

There are things that can be done, depending on the type of spirit. If you can talk with it, ask what it wants. Wish it well and send it on into the Light if it is benign and obviously lost. If it is mean or destructive, I'd go with help from a local exorcist.

[TlalocW]

12. Come back to reality

First off, don't be scared - there's little possiblity that there are such things as ghosts.

Second, investigate. Chances are you'll find a perfect ordinary reason other than ghosts for whatever you perceive is going on. Coffee makers somehow picking up radio signals and talking alarms on Spider-Man watches going off in the middle of the night have been mistaken for hauntings. Don't bother setting anything up that's too elaborate or expensive. Just one weekend, take a lot of naps during the day and then drink some caffeine and stay up all night. We did that in college once while looking for the ghost that supposedly haunted the music building.

Third, if you're presented with 100% solid evidence that your house is haunted - vases floating, etc., and you have no smart-ass friends interested in performance magic, call the James Randi Educational Forum because their million dollar prize for proof of something paranormal existing is yours.

TlalocW

[leftofthedial]

13. DO NOT go into the basement under any circumstances!

The attic is probably a bad idea too.

[Nihil]

40. Especially if ...

... there's some guy with a video camera just behind your shoulder ...
you just KNOW it ain't a good idea!

[Az]

14. Split up

That way you can cause more damage.

[proud patriot]

15. Sweetgrass , Sage , Blue Corn

Water and Flame , should take care of that toot sweet :hi:

[DS1]

16. Throw a party

[PVnRT]

18. Get a bunch of virgins and send them in

Make sure they stick together at all times, carry lots of flashlights and batteries, and, when they kill the monster at last, they make sure to burn the body IMMEDIATELY and scatter the ashes to the four winds. Then get priests from every religion on the planet ot bless the house. And get an atheist skeptic in there to check it out when all is said and done. That should take care of the problem.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

19. I call Scooby Doo

Because I know it's someone in a costume.

[ArkDem]

20. I just moved in my new house today

Moving was hard but I got squared away
When bells starting rings and chains rattled loud
I knew I'd moved in a haunted house
Still I made up my mind to stay
Nothing was a-gonna drive me away
When I seen something that give me the creeps
Had one big eye and two big feet
I stood right there and I did the freeze
It did the stroll right up to me
Made a noise with its feet that sounded like a drum
Said "You gonna be here when the morning comes?"
"Say yes, I'll be here when the morning comes
I'll be right here, I ain't gonna run
I bought this house, now I am boss
Ain't no haint's gonna run me off"

In my kitchen my stove was a blazing hot
Coffee was a-boiling in the pot
Grease had melted in my hand (pan?)
I had a hunk of meat in my hand
From out of space there sat a man
On the hot stove with the pots and pans
"Say that's hot" I began to shout
He drank the hot coffee right from the spout
He ate the raw meat right from my hand
Drank the hot grease from the frying pan
And said to me "You better run and don't be here
When the morning comes"
Say yes I'll be here when the morning comes
I'll be right here now, I ain't gonna run
I bought this house now I am boss
Ain't no haint's gonna run me off.

[buddhamama]

21. offer it water or coffee

and converse with it. i want to know what s/he knows.

i'd love it if the experience turned out similar to an Ann Rice novel, Servant of the Bones, maybe.

[arwalden]

22. Call Sci-Fi Network And Get My Own TV Show

-- Allen

[TrogL]

24. Try and seduce it

[GoddessOfGuinness]

25. Sell tickets

It's the American way...

[noonwitch]

26. Get a Ouija board and try to make contact

Or call a priest/minister-this worked for my cousin, who said she had a female ghost. Her minister drove it out of the house, or so she said.

[Loonman]

28. I wouldn't recommend

I wouldn't recommend messing around with a Ouija board.

[Az]

31. Yeah

Might inadvertantly tell yourself something about yourself you didn't want yourself to know about yourself.

[Interrobang]

27. Nothing. I don't believe in ghosts...

...and according to all the literature, that means that they should never bother me. ;-)

[Nikia]

29. Play loud music

My friend bought an allegedly haunted house. From day one he has played heavy metal music and has not encountered a ghost in the house and neither has his family, who had previously encountered ghosts in another place.
He thinks that the music scared the ghost(s) away.

[ronnykmarshall]

32. Hire the ghost as a house keeper.

[ScreamingMeemie]

33. Call up the movers...and move far away..not leaving a forwarding address..

in case it tries to follow us...;)

Glad to see you up and about!!!

[Melsky]

34. Put the ghost in a jar

[beyurslf]

36. Stay up late chatting with the ghosties and plotting to scare the

hell out of the republican neighbors. :)

[mvd]

37. Move

I just couldn't stand not knowing when one of them would make its presence known. :-)

[LynneSin]

38. Move in with Khephra, hopefully his house ISN'T haunted

:shrug:

[hippiechick]

39. Depends on what kind of haunted ?

The type I regularly communicate with ?
Light some candles, welcome them and thank them for walking with me.

The not-so-benevolent kind ?
I've got a smudging kit I keep handy. :)



:hi Kef !
Good to see ya' back in the saddle ! :pals:



:hippie:

[Nihil]

41. Stay calm and learn

Unless there is something particularly nasty happening, take the
chance to learn about phenomena that you'd normally only read about.

Nihil

[arwalden]

42. Make An Appointment To See A Psychiatrist... Because It's All In My Mind

It's a form of psychosis... LITERALLY!

-- Allen