Macabre (Scottish) Humour

[FunkyLeprechaun]

An elderly Scotsman lay dying in his bed.



While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the

aroma of his favourite biscuits wafting up the stairs. He gathered his

remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed.

Leaning on the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with

even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled

downstairs.

With laboured breath, he leaned against the door-frame, gazing into the

kitchen.

Were it not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in

heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were

literally hundreds of his favourite biscuits, freshly baked.

Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of love from his devoted Scottish

wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?

Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table,

landing on his knees in crumpled posture. His aged and withered hand

trembled towards a biscuit at the edge of the table, when it was

suddenly smacked by his wife with a spatula.............



"Fuck off" she said, "they're for the funeral."

[FunkyLeprechaun]

1. Hey I thought it was funny

BTW.... a dye-in-the-wool, Kilts-wearing Scotsman sent the email. So I can guarantee it's not offensive to Scottish people.

[YankeyMCC]

2. LoL

You're not alone in thinking that's funny...I love this kind of joke. ;)

[FunkyLeprechaun]

5. Thanks!

Which is why I shamelessly kicked before! And now kicking again!

[Indi Guy]

3. A wonderful holiday tribute!

You suck :P

[FunkyLeprechaun]

4. Aww how sweet

You suck too! :P

[FunkyLeprechaun]

6. A bagpipe tootin kick

n/t

[BurtWorm]

7. I don't get it.

Why aren't people responding to this? It's highly-arious!

:thumbsup:

[montanto]

8. o.k., that's funny. thanks for posting.

[driver8]

9. Ha Ha -- now THAT'S funny!!

Man, I have a warped sense of humor...