Would you like to help write a country song? I have the title . . . .

[Bertha Venation]

The song would describe a snippet from my little life.

It seems that Dom, the wonderful, witty, and rotund (a là "Molto" Mario) chef in the café at my office has a crush on me. He's a real sweetie, but . . . .

This song would be sung by Dom, the sweet and kinda sad & lonesome puffalump. The title of Dom's song would be:

"Why Do I Have To Be Married And Why Do You Have To Be Gay?"

;) Thoughts?

[Bozita]

1. First step in writing lyrics for country song: Drink eight beers

[Champion Jack]

2. Don't forget you need lines about trucks and gin joints

[Wickerman]

4. Don't forget the dog

[SOteric]

16. And a train station!

[BurtWorm]

3. I hear a twang!

If my brain were'nt mush I'd try to write something here...

I'm just a humble cowboy in an office block's canteen
An' yer the purdiest cowgirl I think I've ever seen
I'd sweep you off yer cowgirl boots if I only had my way, but darlin'
Why Do I Have To Be Married And Why Do You Have To Be Gay?"

[trof]

5. it scans. 2nd verse

Your face is pleasin', darlin.
You got such purty curls.
An' we got so much in common
'cause we both like girls.
<hee>

[Bozita]

6. Still working on the beers...I'll be back when the alcohol begins to ...

...enhance my creativity.

[Bertha Venation]

7. ROFL You guys are all awesome.

:7 :loveya:

[SoCalDem]

8. A song for the guys especially.. Fox (sports)Nat'l Anthem

http://www.pureesoiree.be/Post/?P_ID=2684

[BurtWorm]

10. Well, your kittie's awfully pretty, missy,

But he's makin' me mighty ill
With his nose a-comin' at me
Feel jes' like I took a pill
Yes, he's handsome as the dickens
But when his nose becomes a face
I don't know if I'm hallucinatin'
Or way out in outer space...

[catzies]

9. Ok here goes

When I saw you at the grill
You took my breath away
But Why Do I Have To Be Married
and Why Do You Have To Be Gay

It gets so lonely sometimes
In the cafe at the park
I know my nights would be better
if I had you in the dark

...whoops! better stop before it turns into a sex thread! :evilgrin:

[Mobius]

11. "Your momma's a whore, but she's the only sister I got"?

:D

[Mobius]

12. "Daddy kisses better than you do"?

:7

[Mobius]

13. "Who needs a wife, when you got a barn full of livestock"?

LOL

[Mobius]

14. my song titles have nothing to do with this topic

it was my commentary on country music in general, and was satirical.

[bif]

15. What do you get when you play a counrty song backwards?

You get your dog back. You get your truck back. You get you gun back...

[GoddessOfGuinness]

17. hmmm

Why do I have to be married
And why do you have to be gay?
If we both get sex operations
What will our Congressmen say?
My husband will surely reconsider
Since his momma wouldn't want things that way
Oh why do I have to be married
And why do you have to be gay?

[randr]

18. "Don't they know its the end of the world?

it ended when you kissed a girl"

[geniph]

19. Oooh, oooh, doggerel!

Why do I have to be married?
Why do you have to be gay?
The first time I saw you,
I thought it was a red-letter day

I thought we had a moment,
the look on your face changed my life!
I wrote you a love letter,
Which was intercepted by my wife.

I lie here sadly in traction,
My wife's got quite a temper, they say
Oh why do I have to be married,
and why do you have to be gay?