I'm night "security" at a retirement home. *chuckles* Ask me anything.

[Political Heretic]

I am reminded of a bit from Jerry Seinfeld's stand up about the security gates around retirement communities in Florida.

"what is the major security issue here? Are the old people trying to escape....? Are people stealing old people....?"

[Donk Yore]

1. Watch out for

those evil drug doers. Pot smoking in the restroom at the end of the hall when they think you're asleep. Can't trust the elderly, ya know.

good luck, and here's a question:

What is the most interesting conversation you've had with a resident so far?

[Political Heretic]

3. Probably when an 89 year old resident said this......

I was at her condo (this is a pretty upscale retirement community) after a false alarm emergency page, and I said something making small take about her daughter coming to visit her tomorrow. Now I know for a fact that she loves her daughter, cause I've seen them together often. But she's a spunky old woman with a black sense of humor, and she muttered back, "pff that little fucker, checking to see if I'm dead yet." :D I almost busted out laughing.

[Donk Yore]

6. 89 huh?

That is funny! :rofl:

[Political Heretic]

8. Or 85.... I forget... but she was 80 something because there was a note about her b-day celebration

:)

[Donk Yore]

9. I'm thinkin' I'm not the only one who

feels that #7 should be answered! :)

People gotta know!

[Shine]

2. Just make sure none of them are sneaking out to swim in pools with wierd pod things

:D

a la "Cocoon"

[Kutjara]

4. I've heard retirement homes are like Wal-Mart for thieves.

They reckon they can break in, steal what they like, and, even if they're discovered, they can just run off and nobody'll be able to catch them.

[Political Heretic]

10. This is a big property. Condos / Lodge, Assisted Living Buiding, and Cottages

So it probably is good that they have some security.

Really, I actually consider my job more to be "on call" in case of an overnight emergency. That's why I'm at the computer so much - I'm at the front desk of the lodge that connects the condo residents and the assisted living residents. I do patrol rounds around the property throughout the night, but mainly I have a pager, and our residents in the lodge and assisted living have "pull cords" in several places in their residences for emergencies. Also, phones have an "off hook" warning that also goes to my pager. First Aid kit by my leg, Defibrillator on the wall, I'm CPR certified. I think that's the most important reason for me to be here.

[MilesColtrane]

5. I take it you go by the credo, "If my dentures glass is rockin', don't come a knockin'"?

[Political Heretic]

11. AAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa it burns my eyes!

:scared:

[Redstone]

7. Why are you posting on DU when you should be watching for illicit bedpan-trafficking?

Redstone

[Political Heretic]

12. Heh heh... kinda answered that above in the post about this place being big.

:)

There's a lot of down time where I just need to be here "in case" something happens.

[enigmatic]

13. Tell me about the 2 most eccentric residents!

Also, what's the oddest thing you've ever seen while on the job?

[Donk Yore]

14. Is there a spare room in which

I may take a nap? Preferably with a lock on the door?

[krispos42]

15. Does your taser double as an external defib device?

:evilgrin:

[Jamastiene]

16. That just sounds wrong in so many ways.

I think it was the chuckle. :P