Seven Habits of Highly Effective Pirates

[HawkerHurricane]

Rule #1: Pillage, then burn.
(Amazing how many pirates go bankrupt forgetting that)

Rule #6: If violence wasn't your last resort, you failed to resort to enough of it.

Rule #8: Mockery and derision have their place. Usually, it's on the far side of the airlock.

Rule #9: Never turn your back on an enemy.

Rule #12: A soft answer turneth away wrath. Once wrath is looking the other way, shoot it in the head.

Rule #13: Do unto others.

Rule #16: Your name is in the mouth of others: be sure it has teeth.

Rule #27: Don't be afraid to be the first to resort to violence.

Rule #29: The enemy of my enemy is my enemy's enemy, no more, no less.

Rule #30: A little trust goes a long way. The less you use, the further you'll go.

Rule #31: Only cheaters prosper.

Rule #34: If you're leaving scorch-marks, you need a bigger gun.

Rule #35: That which does not kill you has made a tactical error.

Rule #36: When the going gets tough, the tough call for close air support.

Rule #37: There is no "overkill". There is only "open fire" and "I need to reload".

1: Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Take his fish away and tell him he's lucky just to be alive, and he'll figure out how to catch another one for you to take tomorrow.

2: Just because it's easy for you doesn't mean it can't be hard on your clients.

http://everything2.com/?node_id=1740950

http://www.schlockmercenary.com/index.html

[Bucky]

1. somewhere around 34, they start being rules for special ops assassins

A true pirate cannot be confused with a special ops assassin

[HawkerHurricane]

2. Actually, given the source material...

it's rules for mercenaries. Pirates were never much into destroying things just to be destroying them. It's hard to loot the ship you just sank. And a reputation for killing everyone just means that everyone will fight to the death (sorry, Wesley).

[havocmom]

3. Damn Hawker, it's good to see you post

And thanks for the laughs. Much needed today

[HawkerHurricane]

4. I was inspired...

by a post in the gun forum for 'how to defend yourself with a gun'. Rather than start a flame war about it, I looked up and found the 'rules for pirates' and put them in the forum.

[jmowreader]

5. So...you finally started that post-retirement career?