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Let's Play A Moral Dilemma Game...

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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:01 PM
Original message
Poll question: Let's Play A Moral Dilemma Game...
You knock on a co-worker's door and you hear "just a minute" and about a minute later she answers the door red faced, out of breath, sweating, and then you see the guy in the office with her and it all becomes clearer as to what might be happening. You talk to her for a few minutes about what you came there for and walk away.

As you think about it you realize that this person is getting ready to come down on another couple of co-workers who are involved with each other and have been caught hot and heavy at work, and it has gotten to the point that it is disruptive to the milieu.

Okay, the dilemma, obviously a double standard for the one person who's office door you knocked on, she is the other two person's supervisor, thus making it a double standard or even hypocritical.

Do you: (not that this has actually happened today ;) )

I'm just curious to see what DU'ers would think
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:06 PM
Response to Original message
1. Nobody likes a snitch. nt
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:08 PM
Response to Reply #1
4. true
and nobody likes people who spread things that aren't true either
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:12 PM
Response to Reply #4
8. You should know. nt
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:12 PM
Response to Reply #8
10. Is this like neener neener neener?
:rofl:
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Lex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:06 PM
Response to Original message
2. stay completely out of it or the shit will get on you when it hits the fan
and it will hit the fan eventually

(experience speaking)




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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:07 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. ...
that's my decision
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Lex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:09 PM
Response to Reply #3
5. ..
:hug:


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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:10 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. back at ya friend
:hug:
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madinmaryland Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:10 PM
Response to Original message
7. Hmm. The real question is wtf you were doing at the door.
Is there something you left out of this story????

Inquiring minds need to know.

:hi:
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:12 PM
Response to Reply #7
9. I had to ask her about whether she had made a phone call
and she is my friend and I was going to talk to her about some further information about making that call that she needed to know.

Of course this is just hypothetical :P
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madinmaryland Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:24 PM
Response to Reply #9
13. Uhhh, yeah. I've heard that story before!!1!!
:rofl:

:hi:
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:24 PM
Response to Reply #13
14. well it's true, true true
:D

:hi:


:rofl:
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Inchworm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:15 PM
Response to Original message
11. Guess I'm an other...
I'd not say anything and use that info for a raise.. or.. the relief of a "raise." :P

:hi:
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:18 PM
Response to Reply #11
12. well she has no power to give me a raise
she isn't my supervisor :P
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khashka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:41 PM
Response to Original message
15. Back out and let them (discreetly) know
you know. It may shame her into not being so hypocritical if she knows you know.But other than that I'd say nothing (her relationships are her business) -unless she comes down hard on your co-workers, then I'd talk and I'd let everyone know.

Khash.
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:53 PM
Response to Reply #15
18. I'm relatively certain that she knew that I knew
I mean, it was a bizarre interaction for almost a minute as I talked to her and she held out a notebook to me and I was like "what" and she looked at me, and then finally I said "are you okay?" and then I saw him and had an aha moment and started asking her what I'd come to talk to her about. Then I left.

:shrug:
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Lil Missy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:42 PM
Response to Original message
16. Other: I'd go to the supervisors boss. Having sex at work is not appropriate for ANYONE!
Of course it is a double standard! But a supervisor, in particular, should be held to a higher standard, not a lessor one.

And the others should be terminated too. Sorry to sound like a prude, but it's just not appropriate in the workplace.
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:51 PM
Response to Reply #16
17. While I agree
she is a friend...

I am sure she knew I realized what was going on.

I will have to think about what you've said.

thanks

:hi:
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Connonym Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:54 PM
Response to Reply #16
19. Inappropriate yet oddly hot
nm
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:55 PM
Response to Reply #19
20. There is the fact that
I've had the fantasy of "doing it" in my office

I've never done "it" in my office, but hey, :P

it is oddly hot
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 10:57 PM
Response to Original message
21. Well, hypothetically...because she is a friend, I would talk to her
about it someplace outside of work. I just can't believe she would be guilty of what she was going to discipline for. Are you sure that is what was hypothetically going on??
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:02 PM
Response to Reply #21
22. Hmm...
I'm not sure how far it had gone in there, but far enough that I'm sure that it was heading that way... I know her and I know this is a newer boyfriend and he works in the same building but not in our department.

So I can't say I am 100% certain... but I would venture to say that I came upon something more than friendly chit chat :shrug:

Anyway, I'm not going to say anything unless she asks me about it. I'm certainly not going to bring it up anywhere else.

It surprised me a little, but not tremendously... just that she was at work
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:05 PM
Response to Reply #22
23. Sounds like you've got it all worked out then.
How are things otherwise?
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:08 PM
Response to Reply #23
25. Today has been busy as heck
but it's been a good day, productive in all the wrong places at work, but what the heck, at least it was productive and I think I actually felt like I was helping some people and that felt good.

Some things may be looking better on the negotiation front, and that is good.

My son was here this evening earlier and we had fun, went and ate Mexican food and he showed me a new weather radar he had found online on a local TV station that he was excited about. :D

:hi:

:hug:
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:10 PM
Response to Reply #25
27. I am glad...
:hug:

I got to spend this evening with just my son as well. We went to Panera, bought a gift for his teacher and came home to cuddle up (don't tell him that I posted that on the internets :) ) to watch Ghost Hunters, one of his favorites.

I hope tomorrow goes just as well for you.
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:19 PM
Response to Reply #27
32. As I hope you have a good day too
:hug:

no telling him you posted it :D


:hug:
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DarkTirade Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:07 PM
Response to Original message
24. I'd wait and see if that person still comes down on the other couple of co-workers or not.
If so, then call that person out on hypocrisy. If not, don't worry about it.
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:09 PM
Response to Reply #24
26. Possibly so
but probably won't call her out.

but I'm interested in the feedback here because I found myself wrestling with it and wondered if I was thinking way off on it.

:hi:
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DarkTirade Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:13 PM
Response to Reply #26
30. I'm very much an 'it's-none-of-my-business' kinda guy...
but on the other hand, when it affects the people around me negatively then I'd call that person out on it. I.E., the hypocrisy bit. :)
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:19 PM
Response to Reply #30
33. I'll have to see what shakes out I guess too
I appreciate the feedback though!

:D
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Carnea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:11 PM
Response to Original message
28. I'd ask her out for "lunch"
Edited on Wed Jun-11-08 11:14 PM by Carnea
But I'm a guy and a bit of a pig.....

Having had sex at the office more than a few times..... I think that it can complicate things and make things more exiting. It's a judgment call. Pick your partners is the most important standard and clearly she's a goer*

If I was female I would still ask her out to lunch. (For some reason I can see myself as a female but only as a lesbian)

For the record well over half the woman I've dated or married in the last twenty years I met at or through work. Honestly outside of tittie bars and family reunions there really isn't anywhere else.






* Obscure Monty Python reference,

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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:18 PM
Response to Reply #28
31. a possibility
very much younger than I am

:P

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AlCzervik Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:13 PM
Response to Original message
29. those people you found out today, they know you know right?
maybe they won't be saying anything now to the people they were supposed write up. If they still go ahead and write them up then i would call them on their bullshit, if not then i'd say just file it away .
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:27 PM
Response to Reply #29
34. One of them sure
she's the one I went to her office to talk to her

it's possible that she won't end up being the person that writes up the other two, but she was talking about it yesterday.
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Gormy Cuss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:29 PM
Response to Reply #29
35. That's the way it played out in my office.
They knew that they could be exposed and decided to go easy on the other couple.
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-11-08 11:32 PM
Response to Reply #35
36. he he
might just go down that way :shrug:
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