If Cats Could Talk, What Would Yours Say?

[SoDesuKa]

Since both Otis and Gracie are big time sleepers, they would probably excuse themselves for yawning.

Oh, pardon me. Really, it's not the company . . . It must be the big lunch I had . . . I'm so sorry.

Then again, maybe not. Somehow I'd be less surprised to hear a cat talk than hear one apologize for yawning.

[Heidi]

1. "Day 2,920 of my humans' captivity . . . YAWN." (nt)

[Sanity Claws]

2. "Pet my head, mom."

That is what my little kitties would say.

[zanne]

3. If my cats could talk, God forbid...

"I don't like this food"! "Let me outside"! "LET ME INSIDE"! "I love to knead my paws on your tummy--it's so soft and mushy". "Why are you so touchy about who gets to walk on your keyboard"?
"I don't care if you haven't had your coffee yet--feed me"! "FEED ME AGAIN"! "Let me outside". LET ME INSIDE"!.........

[TZ]

4. My god....it would be nonstop conversation

Feed me..but not THIS food, that food, no wait the dry food, no the wet food, but the right type of wet food..Why are you sleeping? Its dark, which is play time..What? how can you not like us jumping on the bed in the middle of the night? Come on..and how come you don't like our claws, scratching is soooo much fun..Suck it up..we bite each other all the time so how can a little nail hurt...etc..etc...:rofl:

[MrScorpio]

5. "Get me out of this pound and adopt me"

"C'Mon, let me be your kitty cat."

[La Lioness Priyanka]

6. i love you mommy. she really would. worlds sweetest little girl.

[Drum]

7. Glad you asked...

:P

[mainegreen]

8. "When are you getting rid of the other two humans?"

"I don't really like them."

That's what kitty would say to me.

[yellowdogintexas]

9. " MEE NOW!!!!"

(all four)

edited to add:

actually, Lewis my big gray would be something like this

what are you doing? feed me, now not later now not later. i'm ok, how're you? pet me now not later now not later

He always sounds likehe is saying Now, now later, whatever he is up to

[SteppingRazor]

10. "I realize I just wandered in off the street uninvited, but...

where the fuck is the food? This once a day shit has got to end."


The other cat would say nothing, as we are not on speaking terms.

[montanto]

11. My cat does talk:

He says "It's time to go to bed" he says "put me in the bed" he says "It's three o'clock in the morning, I'm getting up" He says "It's four o'clock in the morning, let me back in bed" he says "It's five o'clock in the morning" he says "why are you getting out of bed?"(then he makes a silly quote from Apocalypse Now "never get outta the bed, absolutely goddamn right"). Then he says "more food" he says "fresh water?" He says "clean my catbox!!11!!eleven!!" Then he says "let me out," then almost immediately he says "let me in." Then he asks if its treat time. Then he says we should take a nap. Then he asks why I'm in the kitchen, the living room, the dining room, the office. Then he comments on my bathroom habits, he threatens to stomp on my keyboard or sleep on something I am reading, all while yelling that he is gonna do it. He tells me its time to look out the window. He tells me if there is a spider on the wall. He even tells me if he imagines a spider on the wall. He tells me when he sees ghost kitties in the house.

He's got a lot of other shit to say too.

I love him, but I wish he could STFU.

[Rambis]

12. Just look at ya- feed me you fat bastard!

:hi:

[Guava Jelly]

13. They would say

"Meow why aren't you blind yet?" :D

[TZ]

15. bwahaha!

You are one of the few people who can take a innocent kitty thread and pev it up.....:rofl: :patriot:

[Guava Jelly]

17. I didn't reply

I left my computer up and my cat was in my chair....hmmmmm....:yoiks: :D

[AlGore-08.com]

14. OPEN THE D*MN DOOR! NO, I DON'T WANT TO GO OUT, I JUST WANNA LOOK!!

BECOME CAT FURNITURE - - NOW!!!

I KNOW I HAVE A CAT FOUNTAIN BUT I WANT TO DRINK OUT OF THE BATHROOM SINK - - TURN IT ON NOW!!!

AMUSE ME - - NOW!!!

Nap time!

TALK WITH ME - - NOW!!!

OPEN THE DOOR AGAIN!! NO, I DON'T WANT TO GO OUT, I JUST WANNA LOOK!!!

THERE'S ONLY HALF A BOWL OF CAT FOOD - - REFILL IT, NOW!!!

WHERE'S MY D*MN TREAT!?!?

I loooooooooooooove you.

CLEAN OUT MY LITTER BOX - - NOW!!!!

[unpossibles]

16. mine do talk all the time

they just don't speak English.

My bet is that if translated, most of their speaking would be "hey! Hairless ape with thumbs! How about some tuna down here?"

[Tommy_Carcetti]

18. Meow?

Just a guess.

[MountainLaurel]

19. "If that dog steps on me one more time . . .

I'm going to smother him in his sleep."

[greenbriar]

20. don't touch me

I hate you

[SOteric]

21. Can I have some more of that shrimp stuff? That was good.

[bertha katzenengel]

22. STOP with the going away for days at a time!

[Arugula Latte]

23. "What -- You have some sort of problem with my tail hanging down in the middle of the monitor?"