So court went well today... thanks for the vibes last night!

[belladonna]

Apart from having to see him briefly (they kept us apart altogether with the exception of the time that we went before the judge), it all worked out fairly well. The judge extended the order for a year and, surprisingly, kept the baby on the order for the time being. I don't think he was all that impressed with the weird, paranoid rambling story the ex tried telling him... now THAT was truly surreal:crazy:


Apparently, according to him, this is all a huge conspiracy designed to ruin his life or something. If you believe his theory, I paid 50 bucks a session for counseling for the last few months, then decided one night that I'd MAKE him punch me in the face and send me to the emergency room for stitches... all the while putting my new job at risk (I had to miss time after the ER visit, etc. Oh, and I also made sure I was HOLDING MY CHILD IN MY ARMS when he almost knocked me out cold... all so I could end the relationship. Gawd, I'm diabolical. :wtf:

Needless to say, the judge wasn't too impressed and ruled in my favor :eyes:

[bicentennial_baby]

1. WTF?

:mad: Let me at him, like now...

I love you sweetie :hug:

:loveya:

[belladonna]

4. Not to worry, my sweet

I'm fine now and things are good with me and Maggie. I'll probably keep a reminder of it with a scar right over my left eye, but I'm absolutely fine otherwise. My boss and all of the docs at my new job were incredibly understanding and supportive, so I still have a good job... not that I ever needed him in a financial sense anyway, but still. And hey, when I start feeling a twinge of self pity coming on, I just look at this beautiful baby that came out of all of this....


IMG]



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I mean, seriously... how could I possibly be sad looking at that face??? :loveya:

Oh yeah, and I love ya too :loveya:

[bicentennial_baby]

8. Adorable like her Mama

I see you in her face. :loveya:

But yeah, if he acts up, I'm there with my can of whoopass. I'll fuck his shit up, for real. :)

Miss you!!

[belladonna]

12. Heh, don't know if I'd call myself adorable

But yeah, she's my first child who actually looks like me... all the others looked just like their father.

Miss Maggie, the adorable one, is finally asleep for the night.... time to unwind. That's the only problem I'm having now is some slight insomnia, but I'm sure that'll pass soon enough.

Oh yeah, and I definitely do not doubt that you and your can of whoopass will come and fuck his shit up... you're all loyal like that :P

Miss you too, sweetie... offer still stands anytime you and the hubby are down this way :hug:

[flvegan]

2. I want dibs after bi_baby!

Glad it went well for you and the kiddo, though.

[belladonna]

5. Thanks, sweetie

It's all good tho... I guess it was the wake-up call I needed to finally end it once and for all. The kiddo and I will be fine, I'm sure.

[yellowdogintexas]

11. Take a number, I'll run over to Dallas and pick up Skittles and we will haul up there and

KICK HIS ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[belladonna]

13. Hey, I almost forgot about Skittles and her KICK ASS ways

We'll see how that protective order works out first tho... but thanks :hi:

[yellowdogintexas]

14. well it is a two day drive, AFTER I pick up Skittles. But we are with you!!nt

[Haole Girl]

3. Please be careful

I hope he stays far away from you and your baby. :hug:

[belladonna]

7. Believe me, I am

Locks have been changed and, if he tries in any way to violate the order, I won't hesitate to dial 911. I'm not quite THAT brave... the guy's 6'4" to my 5'3" and outweighs me by a good 130 pounds. Nah, not taking any chances here.

[Fran Kubelik]

6. Holy CRAP

Good for you. Really really good for you. I am proud of you for not taking that shit. That's really hard.

Big hugs to you. I am sorry you went through that, but DAMN - you are strong.

[belladonna]

9. It wasn't a hard decison to make

I told him a long time ago that if he ever hit me, that was a dealbreaker and that the first time would be the last time. I meant it... maybe he knows that now? :shrug:

[backwoodsbob]

10. you're in Virginia...

I can come visit him with friends and ...ummm...discourage him from hassling you.

Wouldnt be a big problem.

[belladonna]

15. Aww, thanks for the offer

So far, he seems to be obeying the protective order, but I'll definitely keep you in mind if he starts acting up :hi:

[ThomCat]

16. I am very, very happy to here that it went well.

:woohoo:

:hug:
I'm sorry that it's only for a year. Hopefully you can get it extended after that.

In the meantime, I hope you can continue to build a really good life for yourself and your baby. Somewhere along the way, I hope he wises up and becomes a better person.

[belladonna]

17. Thanks, sweetie

I think I can get it extended if the need arises... with any luck, it won't.

And yes, my only focus now is on the baby and providing a good life for her... at the risk of sounding incredibly corny, she truly is the light of my life. Just a happy, good-natured sweet baby.... ack, I do sound corny :blush:

As for him, I hope he finally realizes that there is truly something wrong with him, but I don't see that one happening anytime in the near future.

[redqueen]

18. jeebus

i'm glad you're ok... and out of there... and that the judge was sensible

take care... nice to hear from you again

[belladonna]

19. Redqueen!!!!!

I haven't seen you in forever!! How are you?? Gawd, I missed all of you guys. I'll never stay away so long again!

The judge was actually very nice. I was a little worried the first time I went, a few weeks ago, considering where I live, but all of the police officers, judge, etc seem to have zero tolerance for this sort of thing. I think the fact that I showed up armed with pictures and the not quite healed cut above my eye helped too. The fact that he started in with the paranoid delusions was just the topper for the judge, I think.

[redqueen]

20. yes, it's been too long

so good to see you around again... and the kiddo is cute as a can be :)

[belladonna]

21. She is kinda cute, eh??

How have you been?? Catch me up, already :P

[redqueen]

27. well...

i've been separated just over a year now, and getting ready to file for divorce. kids are adjusting as well as can be expected i suppose... getting ready to take some classes in the fall... about time. heh. that's about it i guess... well, been struggling with depression lately but i'm seeing a doctor so that's covered.

i have a home pc now though ... it's strange. heh.

[bicentennial_baby]

28. Yay! No more missing Redqueen on the weekends and evenings!

:bounce:

:hi:

[redqueen]

29. hehehe

:hi:

how are you doin today sweetie?

[bicentennial_baby]

30. I am well, thanks!

Lazy day so far...Going into Boston to see a friend's band play tonight, and then tomorrow is our 1st anniversary party down in Rhode Island. :)

How about you? :loveya:

[redqueen]

31. enjoying having this machine at home

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, music :)

kids will be over later for a while... other than that i'll just be doing chores. woo!

hope you enjoy the band... hope it's not just cause you want to support them, i mean :P

[bicentennial_baby]

32. Er, um...I plead the 5th on that one

:yoiks:

[redqueen]

34. hahahahah

hope you'll have fun anyway :)

you're a good friend :hug:

[belladonna]

37. Holy crap, it HAS been a year already

This year has flown by :crazy:

Have fun and congrats on the first anniversary!! :toast:

[belladonna]

35. Ahhh, so you took the plunge

I remember that you were struggling with that whole situation back in the day. Glad to hear the kids are adjusting well and that you're getting back to school. Make sure you take care of yourself and that your doctor takes good care of you, sweetie :hug:

Oh, and YAY on the home pc... I seem to remember you always disappearing in the evenings and missing ya! I'll be around a lot more now that I've got this personal junk somewhat sorted out and, finally, a 8 to 5 job with weekends off :bounce:

[dorktv]

40. my mentor says that it is usually pretty obvious why an order should be

left in place.

[Midlodemocrat]

22. HE HIT YOU???????

Holy Shit. If he comes anywhere near you or Mags again, you let me know and I'll send BoyMidlo down to kick his sorry motherfucking ass.

No Joke. I could be there in under 3 hours.

[belladonna]

23. Yep, first and last time

I think I've finally figured out why he hit me tho... I mean, after 3 years with nothing like that, it did kinda shock me that he'd do that, so I've been thinking about it a lot. In the past, when we fought, I'd always get up and leave... go to my mother's place, hotel room, etc. I told him awhile back that I was NOT going to have to leave my home anymore or drag the baby around in the middle of the night just to avoid an all night fight with him. It was getting old, you know?

Anyhow, I think that when he realized that night that I wasn't going anywhere and that he'd be the one leaving, it pissed him off and he finally showed his true colors. Just my theory, but it makes sense to me :shrug:

So far, he seems to be obeying the protective order, so no ass-kicking is needed at the moment. Thanks tho, sweetie :hug:

[Midlodemocrat]

24. I'm serious. Any threat at all and we're on our way.

BoyMidlo needs the driving practice anyway. :hug:

[belladonna]

25. I know, sweetie

Ans I appreciate it :hug:

[sasquatch]

33. BoyMidlo, the one that broke the Crosby High swirly recieving record

Please
:eyes:
Send me I know where I can get a pipewrench a Glock and shit load of ammo.





















:P

[RFKHumphreyObama]

26. I'm so sorry you are having to go through this Belladonna

Your ex sounds like a creep. I'm glad he's out of your life. You deserve so much better:hug: :hug: :hug:

Please be careful and take all necessary precautions. I know others have said it and I know you'll do it but it never hurts to reiterate it.

[belladonna]

36. I'm being extra vigilant, especially after yesterday

I'm not sure what he expected to happen in there, but I think he was somewhat shocked that the judge extended for a year and kept the baby on the order. I figure that, if he's going to do something dumb, he'll do it soon. Then again, he might just do what he seems to have done most of his life and disappear... wander off somewhere to practice his paranoia on someone else. So yeah, I'm being extra careful, but thanks for the hugs :hi:

[Debi]

38. Sounds familiar

I MADE my ex headbutt me and split my head open - I MADE my ex show up at my workplace sending security into a tizzy (and somehow I ended up getting fired for a pretty inane reason, but at least my boss didn't have to deal w/my crazy-assed ex anymore) - I MADE my ex punch out the windshield of my car while I was driving and then I also MADE him grab the wheel and steer us into a ditch. I had THAT much control over the jackass!

I'm so glad your ordeal has come to an end - pls follow up with the police if you MAKE him violate the NCO! No place better for abusers than behind bars!

:hug:

[belladonna]

39. It's unreal, isn't it?

I couldn't believe he was actually spouting that crap yesterday. Then, when the judge lost patience and asked him point-blank if he struck me or not, he said he didn't wish to answer that question as he had criminal charges pending. Uh yeah, cause the cops saw the blood dripping down my head and face and kinda thought you did it, dumbass. But yeah, it's all my fault... I really should have taken the baby out in the pouring rain and left the home that I and I alone pay for so that he could have his tantrum and not have to be inconvenienced.... geez :eyes:

Believe me, if he sends me so much as an e-mail, I'll call the oops at this point.