What does it really mean when a woman says she "needs some space"?

[LostInAnomie]

I've been dating this woman for a little over a month and things were going really well. We had been seeing a lot of each other, and spent a lot of time on the phone and AIM talking to each other when we weren't together. The last date we were on though (which went really well, and I still got a kiss at the end of the night) she mentioned that we were moving a little fast. The next week, it was really hard to get ahold of her. She barely would respond to text messages, and when I talked to her she would get off the phone really quickly. After about two days of communication silence, I sent her a text asking if she was avoiding communication and she responded "Yeah, I need some space" and that was all she said.

So, my question is what do women really mean when they say they "need space"? Does it mean I should call her in a week, or does it mean hit the road?

[JVS]

1. It means she wants to fuck other guys, or at least not fuck you for a while.

[Adsos Letter]

29. I have noticed that denizens of The Lounge...

are nothing if not direct, and to the point... :rofl:

And I am sorry for the OP's...uh...loss...

[JVS]

31. Love your sig-line

And when Pharaoh drew nigh, the children of Israel lifted up their eyes, and, behold, the Egyptians marched after them; and they were sore afraid: and the children of Israel cried out unto the LORD.

[Adsos Letter]

32. The LOLCat translation is a work in progress...

http://www.lolcatbible.com/index.php?title=Main_Page

:hi:

[JVS]

33. This one is pretty good

teh peoplez of Israel cum to Samuel n r like5 “d00d, ur liek rly old n ur sunz iz bad. Srsly. give kingz to us for to make us like teh uther peoplez.”
6 wen teh peoplez say “giv kingz for us” Samuel waz like “oh noes!” n sad he go to pray to Ceiling Cat.7 n Ceiling Cat say “srsly. listen ta wut dey sez. iz not u dey no liek. iz Ceiling Cat dey not want.8 Haz dun this seence Egypt. dey liek cheezburgr. liek uthers not Ceiling Cat. now dey wantz king. Srsly. not ur problm. iz me.9 give king but tell dem wut kingz gunna do to dem.”
10 n samuel taek Ceiling Cat’s wurdz n sez11 “thiz wut king do: king takes ur sunz n make dem to ride invisible bike in frunt of da king in battle, in frunt of hiz bike.12 he make dem to lead other peoplez into fight n for uthers to grow for him foodz n mor for maek swordz for to fightz.13 n king taeks ur doters n maeks dem to maek him cookie but dem not to eat it.14 taekz best foodz n landz for to give to hiz buddiez.15 he taekz bst evrythng. srsly.16 peoplez, teh cowz, teh donkeyz for hiz17 n sheepz n u too, btw.18 srsly. u will sez to Ceiling Cat 'S’no good! DO NOT WANT king!' n Ceiling Cat not do nothin. cuz u wntd teh king, lol."
19 but teh peoplez sez ta samuel, “srsly. stfu. DO WANT king.20 DO WANT for ta be like teh uthers. want king for to leed teh battelz.”21 samuel hearz teh peoplez. still not liek. he repeetz wut dey sez for Ceiling Cat.22 n Ceiling Cat sez: “srsly. give dem king alredy.” n samuel sez to da peoplez of Israel “go home. rly.”

[Adsos Letter]

36. There are some great ones...

you just have to search. :D

[XemaSab]

2. Play hard to get

Let her call you.

[Connonym]

3. Means that she's trying to decide if she wants to continue with you or not

possibly there's another guy on the horizon or maybe she isn't sure you're long-term material. She's trying to figure out what she wants to do. At least that's my take on it.

[KG]

4. it means take a hint.

[redqueen]

6. I hope not.

I hate that shit. Why can't people just say what they mean. Bah.

[harmonicon]

10. good fucking question!

I believe we've already discussed this this evening. I think this week, I may have to have the conversation where I explain that I always just say what I mean and that I'm never sending messages or codes... not that anyone has ever - ever - returned with this sentiment.

[KG]

12. personally, i no longer get offended if someone only gives me a hint.

over the years, i've come to recognize them for what they are and understand. well, for the most part, anyway. :P

[redqueen]

15. I don't get offended. I consider it a bullet dodged.

They belong with someone else who also communicates covertly, I think. I don't have the time or the patience. I do wonder why more people don't grow out of that crap in HS.

[Saboburns]

5. Means she's moving on

And so should you.

[redqueen]

7. No idea...

but if someone started avoiding me like that, I'd just prepare for the worst, and start getting used to the idea that they're already gone.

[jeff30997]

8. "needs some space"

Well if your penis is ridiculously small there's plenty of space left. :P

[harmonicon]

9. it depends

In my experience, it usually means "hit the road", but sometimes it does actually just mean "I need some space. I need some time for my own thoughts, but I'd still love to see you in a while." It's hard to determine. Who knows? If I understood women, I wouldn't be where I am now.

[DS1]

11. I wouldn't have texted something like that

but an answer that short seems would indicate to let her call you back

[Lucian]

13. It means find another woman.

I don't know why she couldn't just tell you straight up she doesn't want to see you anymore instead of stringing you along. I hate it when they do that shit. I wouldn't call her anymore, if it were me. Move on.

Good luck.

[Name removed]

14. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Dyedinthewoolliberal]

16. Not a good sign brother........

might start looking around for someone else. :shrug: at least that's my experience. :)

[Skittles]

17. it means leave her alone

could be she's just not that into you, or it could mean she has issues - either way, just let her be

[RagAss]

18. Lose the attachments and gain the world.....move on....don't look back...and block her number....

[astral]

19. Difference of opinion, here!

It could mean all of the above, of course, but hey, you said you've only been seeing her around a month, and when you're not together you're on the phone or AIM'ing -- which means basically she HAS HAD NO SPACE. Not your fault, probably hers too, but being a woman if I think I need some space (whether I am smart enough to speak up about it or not, at the time!) it generally means I have gotten too wrapped in someone else and feel like I am losing myself. I LOVE to be alone. I need lots of space, in a relationship or no and if that can't happen the relationship is in trouble.

She may very well be telling you exactly like it is, not trying to break up with you, but just needing to COME UP FOR AIR.

If you really like her alot, don't give her a psychological whop in the face for speaking up, but give her just enough time to prove to you whether she's talking straight or dumping you.

Just my opinion. When there's a strong initial attraction, people often just glob onto each other too tightly. It's not a bad thing that one person decides before the other to let loose a bit, and see what happens next. It can STILL ALL BE GOOD.

[skygazer]

20. It means back off and quit calling and texting

She may or may not want to go out with you but she already told you it felt a little fast. Which means she doesn't want the two of you to be talking or together all the time and it feels like that's what's happening to you. So she wants some space.

Let her call you. She'll appreciate that - it's what she asked for.

[WildEyedLiberal]

28. Agreed

She is probably trying to tactfully tell you she isn't interested, but that isn't necessarily the case; what IS certain, however, is that she's feeling too pushed and is responding by backing away and breaking off contact. Basically, the ball's in her court now, and she may not talk to you for a while, if ever again. But if she does, it will have to be her idea. You're interested; she knows. She is not so sure she's interested. So all you can do is let her figure that out on her own.

[kwassa]

21. It means move on down the road.

I doubt you will hear from her again, or if you do, she won't commit to the most basic things, so I would get on with life.

From the specifics of what you were saying, she has made some decision that she won't be honest about with you, but the decision has been made. Needing some space is usually permanent.

I've been through this several times in my long dating history.

[Capn Sunshine]

22. exactly what it sounds like

She wants LOTS of space between you and her.
It's a civilized dump.

[Haole Girl]

23. She needs some space.

She may be overwhelmed. It's also a busy time of the year. The worst thing you can do, at this point (if you still care about her) is to keep contacting her (in any form). Let it go. Let her have some time... or all the time she needs. :hug:

[siligut]

24. Ladies? “Dating this woman for a little over a month”.

Come on, maybe she is PMSing? Is that illegal to say on DU? I say give her space. If you really like her and are willing to take a chance, send her flowers and chocolates but stay backed off. Now if you know when her last period was, and this isn’t one week before, I am off base. However, defiantly something to consider.

[jobycom]

25. It means you need to listen more to her and less to people who don't know her.

How would any of us know what she means if you don't? That could mean anything from "So long, Sucker," to "I'm afraid of my own feelings for you and need to slow down and be sure."

If you are asking us instead of her, though, that's a bad sign on a lot of levels, from her perspective as well as yours.

[Symarip]

26. I'll catch shit for this

But that's fine. I'm drunk.

Here's what it means:

"I like you, but I am going to or have already been fucking other people and although I still want to hang out with you on occasion I plan on fucking a lot of other people in the future. Therefore, I would rather say that you are moving too fast than admit that I have no future plans with you and only you."

If you actually ever get a hold of her, plan on either a quickie or a meal paid for by you and nothing else.

[old mark]

27. It means, "See ya, but not real soon." Move on. nt

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

30. It's almost as bad as when she says you're "sweet".

Kiss of death, that. Time to move on.

[amitten]

34. She wants to take it slower.

Give her that. Give it a couple of weeks. If things continue to slip, just let her go.

Ignore the people that are claiming she's fucking other guys. That's blowing things totally out of proportion. Just because you start communicating less doesn't mean it's because you're screwing someone else, for God's sake. :eyes:

[GoddessOfGuinness]

35. It means the same thing it means when a man says it.

[Wapsie B]

37. Most likely there's someone else.

Maybe an ex-bf or someone new. At least it's only been a month. Drop her like a bad habit and move on.