How do you feel about homemade gifts?

[nadine_mn]

Poll question: How do you feel about homemade gifts?

My husband and I lovingly refer to ourselves as the Crappy Crafters. I love to craft and have made hundreds of bracelets, necklaces, earrings (and even successfully sold some at craft shows). I am really getting into found object jewelry and will post some funky stuff. I have thousands of dollars worth of craft supplies of every type stashed in boxes (I kinda go on binges and craft like a maniac, get frustrated that it doesn't come out the way I want it to, then start new projects).

For me, homemade items are not cheap because I go on a binge and buy tons of crap I never use. I have no idea why people think homemade means low cost. However, I love crafting... and my grandparents always treasured my creations... love grandparents! My mom thinks its crap and doesn't want anything homemade, it better be nice and expensive or shove it. Since my grandpa died this year and my grandma is hospice, I really don't have anyone to make stuff for and I am feeling lost.


So how do you all feel about homemade gifts? I think they are great when made with love - so corny I know. But some of my most treasured stuff is made by loved ones. Some are beautiful (my grandma's afghans) and some are hilarious (my grandpa's attempt at making me a lapdesk out of wood and plexiglass and weighed about 7 pounds). But because they made it, and loved making it I love it. I have kept all the stuff kids in shelters have made for me when I was a child advocate and I have some stuff friends and family.

[Suich]

1. I love homemade gifts!

One year my niece made a small quilt which I use all the time. For my birthday I got 13 small homemade pies!!! Once it was cutting board her son made in shop. I hope she sends a box-o-cookies for Christmas...can't wait!

:thumbsup: :thumbsup: for homemade gifts!

[SeattleGirl]

2. I love homemade gifts.

I have several afghans and a beautiful embroidered quilt my mother made for me.

I have a painting my daughter did when she was about 8. It's actually pretty good.

I have two gorgeous pictures of the Space Needle that my daughter and son-in-law took, and then framed for me.

Nothing wrong with homemade stuff!

[skygazer]

3. I love homemade gifts from people I care about

They remind me of that person every time I use or look at them, and the fact that someone put that much effort into something for me is very special.

Homemade gifts from more casual friends are a little ..... odd. They kind of put you on the spot. They don't have the same sentimental value so if it's something that is not really your taste, you end up feeling obligated to display it because it was made, not because it is special to you. And I have had that sort of situation.

Nice thought, but a little odd. :shrug:

[LeftyMom]

4. As long as they're thoughtful and kinda good, I'm cool.

My mom does beading and a few years back she made me a watch. Small issue: I never wear jewelry and I hate watches. It was kind of obvious she'd rummaged around in her project box for something, which was kinda thoughtless and hurtful, because she obviously hadn't put any thought in.

[nadine_mn]

6. That's the criteria for me... if they are thinking of you

and your tastes, needs etc that is what makes it great

but if they have that oh crap moment I need to get so and so a gift, here let me sprinke some glitter on a piece of cardboard.... thats different

[IntravenousDemilo]

11. Wow, she sounds good.

Do homemade watches keep better time?

[LeftyMom]

13. Obviously she didn't make the watch face, she just beaded some kind of watchband.

:shrug:

[quakerboy]

5. is it useful? Is it relevant to the person receiving it?

Some people make craft gifts that are neither. Some make those that are both.

Don't give me a scarf. I don't need it, don't want it, but then am stuck with it and feel that I can never get rid of it. I hate useless gifts, because that effort might have gone into something that could do something for someone. But if you know how to make a nice quilt that I could both appreciate on an aesthetic level and a practical level, Rock my world.

On the other hand, my mother is a sentimentalist. If I make her something, I know it will be valued and cherished, even if it is a ceramic inchworm. So sometimes I do(or, in the case of the worm, my sister did).

[lizerdbits]

8. I agree

I think the jewelry as in the OP would be cool, I get most of mine at craft shows since it's a little more unusual in terms of colors and shape. I still have an afghan that my grandmother made me almost 30 years ago. What I dislike is decorative knick knacks (home made or not). Most of them get thrown out, but I've met people who enjoy having a lot of things like that in their house so for them I'm sure that would be a great gift.

[undeterred]

7. Men should not give the woman they love

a crappy homemade stained glass thing that didn't turn out very well. Especially if she is hoping for a real gift.

[Chan790]

9. She should be happy...

it's the thought that counts.

It's not dissimilar to the "toaster-cozy/diamond-ring paradigm".

Gift A (toaster cozy) does something useful, whereas Gift B (diamond ring) does nothing.

Ergo

Gift A > Gift B.

It didn't work when I tried it on my ex-girlfriend either.

Nevertheless, it was a good thought...and it's the thought that counts.

[undeterred]

10. I kept thinking "I should be happy"

but I have never been so disappointed in my life. It looked like a child made it, and besides, I was hoping for some useless jewelry.

[Chan790]

12. Yeah, I learned my lesson the hard way.

Shoddy workmanship is another thing altogether...if you're going to give a homemade gift, it's kind of imperative that it not look like you did it last moment while drunk.

[undeterred]

15. That year I was sewing him a nice wool shirt

so I guess the idea that homemade is better came from there. But the shirt was useful and wellmade. In fact, after I opened the stained glass thing, I thought about asking for it back! If a child had given the stained glass thing to me I would have loved it.

[nadine_mn]

22. I have mixed feelings... lol

"real" gifts have an impersonal side to them (although shiny and pretty).

one year we went to one of those paint your own ceramic places. Hubby and I had a blast, and he was making some "secret" item for me.

It was a heart shaped ring holder he painted sky blue with a little red heart. Its so dorky looking that I couldn't help but laugh. Oh man the look on his face... he was so hurt... he was serious. (So glad I didn't ask "is that it...shouldn't there be a ring on it"). He said he noticed I kept misplacing rings (so it was thoughtful) and he thought the heart was romantic for love (romance)....

I still have it and I use it and I love it more than (some) of the rings I have on it.

[FloridaJudy]

14. I'm lucky

The only people who make gifts for me know what they're doing - so I get biscotti that taste great and sweaters that don't unravel at the first washing. I don't know what I'd do if I had some Little Old Lady that sends stuff she thinks is "cute" - those crocheted toilet paper covers or winking Santa Clauses or the like. I don't do cute. Oh, I'd probably thank her and shove it in a closet some where.

My sister sent me a gorgeous hand made apron last year - it looked like something Rachel Ray would wear - and a lot of skilled work had gone into it. But it was a :wtf: moment. I never wear aprons. The last time I wore one my mother was practically holding a gun to my head, and that was over forty years ago. You're supposed to wash your clothes at the end of the day anyway, so why would I want to wash an apron as well?

But it's really beautiful. Every once in a while, I take it out of the closet and admire it.

[skygazer]

16. I actually do wear aprons when I bake

My kids got a kick out of it but it made sense to me. :shrug:

[Peregrine Took]

17. Oddly, I hand monogrammed a bunch of hankies for my friends last year and

they didn't seem to like them at all.

I thought they were very elegant and 'just wanted to do something personal for my girl friends to show them how I felt but they fell "flat'" - I wouldn't do it again.

[bridgit]

18. I good with it, my friends are artists & creative people that come up with cool stuff

:)

[pitohui]

19. honestly? no, if you can't afford to exchange gifts, let's just do cards

i can't think of a homemade gift i've received that i really liked, probably because they're almost always stuff like fudge, cookies, etc. that i would rather i didn't receive in the first place (husband is metabolic syndrome)

nothing is more depressing than something i can tell someone wasted a lot of time on, just so i can pretend to like it and then throw it in the trash

don't get mad about the afghans but they are something i always particularly disliked for reasons of personal history, reminded me of depressed appalachia, just don't want to go there, i would rather just exchange cards than have someone spend hours to make me something that just makes me feel sad


the thing i hate most is what you mention at the end -- "i have kept ALL the stuff"

no, i don't want to keep crap that makes me sad and that i can't use forever, and such things as afghans and 7 lb lapdesks make me really really sad

i don't know if something you grow can be considered homemade, i DO very much like plants that have been cultivated for me, but that's different because everyone knows i like plants and always have room for more -- most homemade gifts have nothing to do w. making me happy and everything to do w. that's what the person knows how to make (depressing soaps, cookies, etc)

i have a beautiful quilt made by my mother in law -- she has sold another like it for $800 -- and it just makes me sad and depressed -- it's white so i can't use it because i can't afford to have it cleaned -- i know she spent time on it, i know it's valuable, but it has never given me a moment's pleasure -- is that really a gift?

i like jewelry and it's practical because wearable but i don't have anyone in my circle w. those talents, all of my beads are made by moi, maybe i should get into your gift giving circle because i'd probably love getting YOUR handmade gifts!

[nadine_mn]

20. sorry you hate what I said about keeping stuff that brings me joy

I can understand that you may not like afghans because they depress you, however my memories are wonderful - my grandma cranked out afghans for every family member, with matching slippers (with pompoms) and everyone has one. My husband felt he was officially part of the family when he got his own set. I would sit on the couch and watch mesmerized by the fast moving fingers of my grandma, and we would talk about everything while she made them and I tried deseparately to make a scarf.

My 7lb lapdesk is awesome.. because my grandpa heard me say I wanted one and he thought "I can make that"... and he got carried away. I teased him - especially when my legs would fall asleep.

The drawings, necklaces and etc that children who were abused and neglected, living in the domestic violence shelter I worked at - those are so precious to me. Because each one is a reminder of that moment of joy - when they weren't thinking about being hit or afraid - that is a part of healing. My favorite card is one from a 17 yr old kid who lived in the inner city of Chicago, moved here to MN, had problems with his mom's boyfriend (as in the son kept trying to beat up the grown man who hurt his mom), and was "tough". A lot of people mistook his quietness for anger instead of shyness and some were afraid of him. I worked a lot with him - talking about abuse, helping him prepare for job interviews, etc and on my birthday, he was so cute and embarassed, he made me a birthday card - with glitter and everything and it really really touched me.

It may make you sad, and I understand that... but understand for me these items are a huge source of joy.

[pitohui]

21. no i'm not criticizng at all

i didn't mean it that way, what i meant was, it's bad enough to give me a homemade gift i don't like but it's truly tragic when it's something i don't like that takes up space because i don't have much room (tiny little house)

it's really issue for some of us older models -- the running out of room

anything that brings you joy is worthy of being kept

as i said before, my problem is i can't recall receiving a homemade gift that gave me joy other than home-grown plants (if they count as homemade)

[nadine_mn]

23. I think the plants count... because they were

cultivated for you. I get the part about running out of room. By choice, we don't have children, so the stuff I have from kids is minimal and the only gifts my furry pets make are in the yard.

I am an only child of a neglectful mother so really I am just happy to get a gift. My in-laws buy us crap all the time - like crystal collectible stuff, which we tell them we can't put out because of climbing kitty and wagging tails, so it just sits in boxes collecting dust.

Homemade or store bought - what matters is that it is appropriate for you (like plants for you, pompom slippers for me)

:hug:

[crim son]

24. Usually I appreciate homemade gifts more than others,

because while people can pick out the wrong item, they can never go wrong if they put time and effort into making it. Lots of stuff I got over the years is long gone, but not the homemade items: they still make me smile.