Please take your shoes off and bang them on the table,

[elshiva]

and shout, "We'll bury you." Thank you.

[Critters2]

1. Will I then become the dictator of the Soviet Union, or what?

Cuz I'd like to be a dictator.

[elshiva]

2. Yes, you sure will.

That's all you have to do. My favorite dictator though was Charlie Chaplin.

[Critters2]

3. Dancing around with an inflatable globe. That's what a dictator should do. nt

[elshiva]

4. What will you do as dictator?

[Critters2]

5. First, I'll outlaw peas. I hate peas. I'l also outlaw the cooking of carrots.

Carrots should be cold and crispy, as God intended.

[elshiva]

6. You remind me of Groucho Marx in "Duck Soup."

He was the leader of Freedonia and he outlawed dirty jokes and gum.
He sang, "When chewing gum is chewed, the chewer is pursued and in the husgal we shall throw him..."

[Critters2]

7. I could see outlawing gum. But the dirty jokes stay. nt

[elshiva]

9. Do we have to wear our underwear on the outside of our clothes?

(This what the dictator did in Woody Allen's Bananas.)

[Critters2]

11. Underwear?! When did we star wearing underwear?! nt

[elshiva]

12. Do we have to speak Swedish?

No underpants? Do we have to wear kilts?

[Critters2]

13. Not Swedish altogether, but the only legal exclamation is "Uff da!". nt

[mainegreen]

8. No. A really ugly witch with a unibrow will wisk you away to Siberia.

Where you will wander the mudbrick road with a drunk soldier, a timber wolf and your government minder in search of the city of Gulag and Baba Yaga.

[elshiva]

10. Is this the witch?

[mainegreen]

14. This is Walid. He is from Ukraine. He will be your government minder.

Please, no pictures.

Now what do you know about the witch?

[elshiva]

15. She's a puppet, an American spy.

Here she is with Margaret Thatcher:

[mainegreen]

16. Your intelligence is no match for our KGB. That is not Margaret Thatcher.

That is Donatella Versace.

[elshiva]

17. How is she related to

Donatello Nobody?
Also you will pay for this act of aggression:

[Xipe Totec]

18. Very well, but what's the ocasion?

[elshiva]

19. Will dance at my funeral?

:)

[Xipe Totec]

20. I don't dance barefoot

too painful.

But for you...

Will there be libations?

I have great respect for anyone who serves libations at a funeral.

Something a Mexican, such as myself, can admire and understand.

(and my Russian son can too).

[elshiva]

21. Lots of vodka and tequila, I guess.

:) BTW: "We will dance at your funeral" was suggested as an alternative translation to "We will bury you."