Help me find the perfect gift for my 10-year-old niece.

[Pale Blue Dot]

I absolutely adore my niece. She is the smartest young woman I know, yet she suffers massive self-esteem problems. Unfortunately, both of her parents are verbally and mentally abusive and are too stupid to realize it. They are trying very hard to crush her independent spirit, and I don't see that changing for a long time.

Anyway, she has shown an aptitude and an enjoyment of art, and I would love to get her a book, appropriate for ten-year-olds, that would explain to her how to channel her frustrations and her true inner self into art. It would be best if her parents did not actually realize that that is what the purpose of this book is. I know this is extremely specialized, but does anyone have any suggestions for me? I would really appreciate it.

[historian]

1. make it simple

I would give her a nice collection of colored pencils and pastels, and a couple of nice drawing pads. Her parents will never realize this is a method of improving her mind - theyll be thankful that she spends hours coloring and doesnt bother them.
How anyone can abuse children is beyond but there it is.

[iamjoy]

2. Do You Live in the Same Town?

If so, why not spend a day with her, take her to an art museum or something and maybe a nice lunch?

Then, if it doesn't make you cringe, take her for a manicure. I know she's ten, but it will make her feel grown up and you can tell the nail tech to use a soft pink or peach color, nothing wild.

I don't know of any art books, but I have a book called "33 Things Every Girl Should Know About Women's History" - and its really geared toward pre-teens and it talks a lot about the fight for women's rights in the U.S.

[Pale Blue Dot]

3. That sound good.

The day out probably wouldn't work. I am her uncle, and to raise her self-esteem I started years ago with telling her to stop getting more beautiful each time I see her. She reacts by pretending that she can't stand me. It's our dynamic, and I'm afraid a day out together would destroy that. :D Thanks for the book suggestion, though.

[rhino47]

4. The best gift I ever bought my daughter was a camera.

This so promotes self esteem.Renee got a charge out of having the control and trust of using her own camera.I bought her a digital but she also enjoyed a kodak disposable.I dont know how much money you have to spend.Heres what I also bought to go along with the camera.
Scrapbooking supplies.I basically asked Renee to do a project.
Like a photo diary .What her day is like.She really enjoyed this.In fact 2 years later she still keeps a pictorial diary to go along with a written diary.Theres no book better in channeling her feelings then one she writes herself.Nothing more thereputic.
Renee my daughter is heavy.She had alot of trouble making friends and connecting with peers.A strange thing is she asked to take a picture of some of her peers.This was a great opening for her and them to get to know each other.
Great sources for digital cameras are ebay.Also there are barbie digital cameras , digital cameras for gameboys.
I bought a poloriod IPix for my younger daughter when she was 4 .You can buy film that the pictures come out in stickers.This was alot of fun for her.It also allowed her to express artistic talent.She used a small scrapbook to assemble pictures of her favorite things,things she admires about herself and other themed scrapbooks.

[Pale Blue Dot]

5. Another good idea. Thanks. nt

[LeinesRed]

6. buy her parents this book...

Reviving Ophelia...in fact, as a caring aunt (uncle?) you should take a look at it too. It's about the endangered concept of adolescence in our young girls.

[chimpy the poopthrower]

7. Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain

Good for learning how to get your brain in "artist" (nonverbal) mode. Maybe not as good for developing unbridled creativity. But I think it helps people fairly quickly learn to make realistic-looking drawings, so might be good for building self esteem.

[Florida_Geek]

8. Side issue

if you have Limewire or one of the file sharing programs download Harry Chapin's Flowers are Red. Your post about your 10 yo reminded me of it.

[Melsky]

9. I vote for art supplies

and maybe a book about artists or an art movement that you think would interest her.

A watercolor set is good, and a pad or two of watercolor paper.

I never liked how-to type art books much. I just found them boring. Maybe you could commission her to paint some things for you and buy them from her for a few dollars. That will get her painting and you can have fun thinking up some things for her to paint.

I had very low self esteem and found that art was a good outlet for my feelings. Now it is my career too.

www.mrart.com is a place where I get a lot of my art supplies. They have great prices.

Your neice is lucky to have such a thoughtful uncle.

[iamjoy]

10. You Are A Good Person

Whatever you decide to do for her, she is lucky to have you as an uncle. Not a lot of men would take that kind of time & thought with their niece.

(not to male bash)

[shugah]

11. if she can watch some DVDs

get some inuyasha episodes and look for something like this: http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3278594912&category=39557&ssPageName=ADME:B:EF:US:1

(altho i think your niece would identify best with kagome - another character in the series - but couldn't find any outfits for that.)

a book about how to draw anime would be a wonderful gift. anime is going to burst here soon. being cutting edge will help your nieces self-esteem. the inuyasha series is just too wonderful! and, for a thinking young lady, anime is guaranteed to spark her creativity! maybe get her some manga. let her parents think she is looking at "cartoons" while she finds a way to indulge her young and tender independent spirit.

an "imho post", based solely on the blossoming i've seen from kids who were lonely and felt out of place before discovering anime and inuyasha.