Favorite Family Guy joke...

[neoteric lefty]

common all you FG DU'ers. What are some of your all-time favorite family guy quotes, jokes, paradoies, and obscure references. A great one I saw last night was the episode where Peter meets Joe for the first time. He was remebering when he volunteered at a sunday school. He was sitting there infront of a bunch of children with his guitar and he sings the following diddy:

Jesus loves me

He loves me a bunch

Thats why he always puts Skippy

In my lunch

I was cracking up for a good 2-3 minutes after seeing that one.

[SmileyBoy]

1. I'm gonna post a bunch of them here:

That episode of Different Strokes where Arnold and Dudley got sexually molested by the guy who owns the bike shop:

"OK boys, now I want you to scream REAL LOUD at my ass."

[SmileyBoy]

2. "Oh GOD, She farted and it went down my throat!!!"

[SmileyBoy]

3. "He runs like a Welshman. Doesn't he? Doesn't he run like a Welshman?"

[SmileyBoy]

4. "Hey Lois... Diarrhea!!!" - "Ha-ha, Peter, I'm holding Iced Tea!!!"

[SmileyBoy]

5. "Oh, GOD, is he... Masturbating???"

"Yeah... Do we - Do we rub his nose in it???"

[SmileyBoy]

6. "Or you can make yourself useful and wipe my button!!!..."

"Circular motion, one finger. And don't you look at me!!!"

[SmileyBoy]

7. "Wait - Lois... Did you just say 'big meat'???"

[SmileyBoy]

8. "Hey Lois, are you pregnant?" - "No." (Pushes her down basement steps)

[SmileyBoy]

9. "Well, I fixed your vaccuum cleaner..."

"Turns out there was a half-eaten meatball stuck in the intake valve."

"Well, did you - did you save it???"

"Uh, no."

"You bastard."

[cjm2222]

10. Eliza Pinchley episode

Featuring the song "The life of the wife is ended by the knife". I love that song. One of my favourite episodes.

[CanuckAmok]

12. Fast-food waiter in chicken costume: "Enjoy your dinners."...

Stewie: "Yes. Enjoy your studio apartment."

[cjm2222]

11. So, where exactly did the angel touch you?

n/t

[neoteric lefty]

13. Death is a bitch

The Hitler show after Hitler talks with Christian Slater, the anouncer says:

"If you're going to be in the Los Angeles Area und would
like tickets to Hitler just call 213-DU WERDEST EINE
KRANKEN-SCHWESTER BRAUCHEN!"

[SmileyBoy]

14. Oh, I LOVE that one!!!

"Today on Hitler, ve vill be talking vith Hollywood hunk Christian Slater."

"Now Christian, so tell me in your next movie... Ve get to see your butt."

(Audience woos and claps)

"Yeah, that's right, Hitler..."

"Can ve - Can ve see it now???"

"Oh, OK."

"Oh my GOD, he's going to do it!!!"

"If you are in ze Los Angeles area, und vould like tickets to Hitler, call area code 213-DU VIERDEST EINE KRANKEN-SCHVEISTER BRAUNCHEN!!!!"