I was at Walgreen's yesterday, in line behind Santa--really--

[Critters2]

beard, red suit, the whole deal. I wished him a "Merry Christmas", and then added, "I've been good" with a big ol' smile. Santa responds, "Well, 'good' is a relative term."

:yoiks:

[Santa Claus]

1. I'll be much more inclined to put your name firmly on the "Nice" list

if you stop leaving me those vegetarian carrot cookies on Christmas Eve. I *hate* carrots!

:P

[Fire Walk With Me]

3. Welcome to DU!

Now where the fuck is my Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air
Rifle!?

[Critters2]

5. You'll put your eye out, kid!! nt

[Santa Claus]

6. Sorry--your Mom told me not to bring it.

She said you'd shoot your eye out.

:P

[Critters2]

7. The carrot cookies were for the reindeer.

The soy hot chocolate was for you. :eyes:

[Santa Claus]

10. Soy hot chocolate??

Are you series? I thought that stuff was coal-tar solution for Rudolph's psoriasis!

[tigereye]

2. are you serious?

that's quite amusing, actually. Sounds a bit like "Bad Santa" (well he would have more swearing) and the Santa in David Sedaris' story...

[Critters2]

4. It was amusing. Also made me wonder if there's something to this

"sees you when you're sleeping, knows when you're awake" stuff!

[Santa Claus]

8. Yep, there is. I hate to break it to you like this, but

I've enlisted the beagle.

Still, you don't have it as bad as some. There's this overmuscled blockhead in Florida that has a whole PACK of pit bulls who keep an eye on him for me. Needless to say, SOMEONE won't be getting that "Best of Nickelback" box set that he wanted so badly.

[Critters2]

9. LOL!! Operation Beagle Spoiling has begun!! nt

[tigereye]

11. did he hit on you?

:rofl: