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I haven't been here in a few weeks... it has been interesting, freeing, entertaining, and emotional.
So, on the 1st, my husband left for work and told me he loved me and would see me in the morning (nothing wrong, no fights, nothing) and 20 minutes later called me to tell me that he wanted a divorce...
Well, On the 2nd, after I came home from work, I packed my stuff and my cats and my puppy and left - went to my parents house (which is in a different town)
My puppy, Beaker the Bichon, had to go back to the humane society cuz I couldn't take care of him by myself - he was so adorable and had so much energy - I miss him! But I saw it as my husband abandoned the pets - when i took them, my husband was no where to be found and didn't come back to the house for like 3 days... he had no way of knowing if i took them or not. I didn't trust him to take care of Beaker at all so I didn't give him a choice - and he never argued about it. It only took 2 days for Beaker to be adopted. It is bittersweet.
On the 4th, I had a major screaming fest with my husband - OMG it was awesome, I yelled and screamed like I had NEVER done before... I never COULD before. I said things that I had pent up for 8 years. God it felt good! My counselor was happy I did it, she said it was therapeutic LOL
On the 6th, I moved my furniture and household items that I don't currently need to a storage unit. Since I'm in the parents basement, I don't need much.
I had all the house bills that were in my name changed to my husband's name, which was all the utilities and the cell phone. Bank accounts are separate too now.
I went to see a lawyer on the 17th... and my divorce was filed yesterday. My husband admitted that he never intended to even see an attorney... It just seems inherently wrong that 8 years adds up to nothing and can be so easily wiped away.
He is still trying to control me, and actually held some of my clothes hostage that I couldn't get right away... which is actually kinda funny ... but still. I got them back. He is still trying to demand things of me; he wants the keys to the house - which I won't give until my name is off the title; until then it is still my home, even if I am not staying there. He makes vague threats (not physical), and still frequently text messages me... I just ignore him, unless there is something of the divorce that needs to be discussed.
I have since found out from my former co-workers at the nursing home that I worked at, that one of the CNAs there is the WHO in all this... I knew my husband wouldn't have been saying such things if he didn't have someone else on the side because he Needs to be taken care of. This CNA is a cousin to a mutual friend of my husband and me; so I was acquainted with her outside of work too. Apparently this has been going on since July. Which makes sense... I had said before I found out about "her" that things had been REALLY bad for about 4 months. This gal is ugly and dumber than a box of rocks - I HATED being her charge nurse because she was so ungodly dumb and slow...she was a burden to my nursing license. And then to find out that she had the nerve to try to be buddy buddy with me at work knowing all this was going on behind my back. That gets me.
My husband still denies ever cheating EVER. Even though his girlfriend is the one doing all the talking and taking credit for "stealing" him... I told my friends that the joke is on her - she has NO CLUE what she is getting into. He has serious mental health issues that need to be addressed. And she didn't STEAL anything... my marriage had been over for years, I just stayed because I had no real tangible reason not to stay, no proof of any wrongdoing.
I am so glad to be free. I don't think there is anything worse than being married but still being alone. Now I am free to correct that. And that, my friends, is whole other story for another time.
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