being an adult is weird; part 2

[harmonicon]

Well, it is!

The bulk of the rest of this post is redacted, for that reason.... needless to say, it involves women, or a woman.

ok, ok, well, maybe she's married too, but they're getting a divorce, so it's ok, right? right?

oh, jesus.

I suck, don't I?

[skooooo]

1. Wow, sounds like some drama....

Well, good luck.

[harmonicon]

5. I hope that drama can be avoided...

I don't know that there's any drama thus far, but it's certainly hanging over the entire situation like a cartoon anvil, just waiting to drop.

re: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=8358983&mesg_id=8358983

I'm just afraid that someone's feelings are going to be hurt, or many people's feelings.... when it's "someone", it's usually me, but for once, I think I'm actually the more stable and emotionally together person in the situation, at least when it comes to this sort of thing.

Being a hopeless romantic works when you're young, but just fucks up everything when you're older. Realistic? What's that?

[kaiden]

2. Just as long as you know you'll be the "transitional."

[harmonicon]

6. it seems that I'm a permanent something, whether I like it or not

I'm just not sure what that something is, has been, or will be.

[blue neen]

3. Even when we're adults, we're still human and subject to all strengths

and weaknesses therein.

Good luck and time will tell you whether it's ok.

[tigereye]

8. hey neen!

Happy Holidays! How have you been? :hi:

[blue neen]

9. I've been great!

How about you and your family? I'm getting ready to go to a Health Care Forum for Tom Daschle, the Obama administration on Tuesday out here in Washington Twp. We have quite a group of Obama supporters out here in the red hills of Westmoreland County!

[tigereye]

10. yeah, Westmoreland went a bit red this past election, didn't it?

Health care issues are so exciting and so interesting. That must be cool to be involved!


Do you see our buddies from out there who were at that meet-up a few years ago? Haven't seen em lately around here. :hi: Happy Holidays and Happy New Year to you and your family, Neen!

[mcctatas]

4. You don't suck...

of course I might be a teensy bit biased in favor of men who like soon to be divorced women

[DS1]

7. You wouldn't be the first

[peruban]

11. Do onto others.

If you wouldn't rather have someone taking your girl from you don't do it to another dude. It's just not ethical. People say a lot of things to justify their affairs - that's it's not going well, that their planning on leaving/divorcing - none of that matters until the promise is fulfilled.

Why be a relationship crutch? Don't be that "other guy". Stand tall and show your discipline and self respect, you'll be much more admired for it, even if it doesn't get you the girl this time. Tell her that your emotions will still be there after the divorce and then see if you're still seen as a way out or if there's something real there. Falling to your baser senses is understandable, but it seems that you wouldn't have posted in the first place if you were sure of your priorities/chances with the other party.

Stay centered and treat this person with compassion and friendship, nothing spoils a relationship worse than the realization that it was just a tool for overcoming more difficult obstacles. In the end, it may be you who are used and cast aside as just a testament to the other party's emotional addictions. Whatever the end result, keeping your hands out of the fire is the safest vector of action.