Have any of you felt mental exhaustion?

[Writer]

Enough that you no longer feel the drive to work? That there's no purpose to your efforts - that they're only futile actions?

[Danger Mouse]

1. Yea, sometimes.

[Writer]

2. Does it generally last a while for you?

[Starbucks Anarchist]

3. Every day.

[Writer]

Dude, I'm sorry to read that.

I've been feeling it for a while, too, but it's been especially bad the last day or two.

[Starbucks Anarchist]

6. I've been feeling it for awhile, too, and today sure as hell didn't help.

[Writer]

7. What happened today?

[Starbucks Anarchist]

10. Had a huge argument with a friend at work.

She accused me of not doing something on a project when I, in fact, did do it. She was in a hurry to leave and kept interrupting me (a huge pet peeve) when I was trying to explain that she had the wrong file pulled up.

I ended the argument with, "It IS the fucking file!" which everybody in the office heard. My coworker stormed out after that. I'm generally a very calm, low-key guy, but when my buttons get pushed enough, I lash out any way I can.

[Writer]

15. Oh, man. I am so sorry.

Do you think you can make amends on Monday?

[Starbucks Anarchist]

18. I sent her an e-mail soon afterwards.

I explained (politely) what her mistake was, and I also apologized for shouting -- though I think I was justified in at least being somewhat angry with her behavior.

I was thinking of calling her tonight, but I may do it tomorrow instead.

[frogmarch]

4. Yes, sometimes

when I'm writing a short story. Every time I finish one, I swear I'll never write another one. For me, writing is hard work!

[Writer]

5. Writing IS hard work.

I'm working on my doctorate right now. Lots of reading. Lots of writing.

Too much, and I feel like I don't have it in me to be an academic. Like I didn't have it in me to see through writing fiction. Or going back into the corporate world, etc. etc. etc...

[femmocrat]

8. Every day.

I'm burned out. And with no way out.

[Writer]

9. What do you think has burned you out?

Is this more a long-term issue or a short-term issue for you?

[femmocrat]

14. No, it's long-term. Thanks for asking.

I'm a "veteran" teacher. I'm only still there because of the health care benefits. I would retire yesterday if I could. I have looked into buying them, but it's too expensive on my (projected) retirement pay.

I compare it to being an "indentured servant".

[Writer]

17. I'm not even a teacher/professor yet, and I already feel exhausted.

And, quite frankly, I'm not looking forward to teaching at all. I hope that I might find a place where I can focus squarely on researching and writing. I don't know if that's possible.

I hope that better times lie ahead of you in regard to health care, and that you can retire as soon as you can.

[femmocrat]

20. Thank you so much.

I really don't like teaching. It's hard, thankless work. I guess some feel the "calling" and love it, but I've been there long enough to know that it gets worse every year. I really feel sorry for those who are just starting out. If I had it to do over, I would.

Good luck to you too. I hope you find what you are seeking, too. :hug:

[mopinko]

11. yup. sometimes i just flounder around for a few days.

usually after a big event, a sale or show, an election, something that has kept me trudging along in 'no matter what' land. my compass gets fried, and i don't know which end is up.
i spend those days here.

[Writer]

22. What do you do for a living?

Are you in sales?

[mopinko]

28. artist.

although i wouldn't put what i do and for a living in the same sentence.

still a semi-retired mom, also. youngest are 17 and 15. have 5 altogether.

[Writer]

31. Five kids - that would exhausting by itself.

I'm glad that your art life is also in order.

The artist's life is a difficult life.

[mopinko]

33. it was.

sometimes i look back and just shake my head. i do not know how i survived. i yelled a lot. that's about all i really remember.

it is a strange life, full of contradictions. and crap. don't forget the crap.

[bigwillq]

12. Yes.

It used to be pretty bad about 8-9 years ago. It's much better know but I still feel like that once and awhile.

[Writer]

23. That's good. What do you think helped to improve your feelings?

[bigwillq]

32. Quitting drugs

Eating better, doing exercise and staying positive.

[Writer]

35. Hey - I think that's awesome.

There's nothing that can make a person feel better than treating himself correctly.

I'm so glad that you found a regiment that improved your outlook on life.

[bigwillq]

40. I don't always keep up

with my dieting and exercise, and I still probably drink too much, but my outlook on life has greatly improved in those 8-9 years! :)

[Mike 03]

13. YES. Me, right now. That is exactly how I described my mental state to my sisters and my mother

this past week.

How can I help? If I can help at all.

Just know you are not alone.

[Writer]

24. Hey! Thanks. It looks like neither of us is alone.

I'm not sure what you or anyone can do to help, so I thought writing about it and sharing stories with other people would be in order.

What's going on with you?

[Mike 03]

16. Thank you for making this post. When I saw it, I felt a sense of Deja Vu, or Prescience.

There is some relief that others feel this too. It is a horrible feeling.

Please feel free to PM me if you ever want to talk. It would be good to have someone to discuss this with. I think I'm close to getting out of this trap, but it's not easy.

Life right now is exhausting.

[Writer]

26. Thanks... I may take you up on the PM offer later on.

I'm working while I write to you.

What is exhausting you about life?

[Locrian]

19. are you sure its mental?

I mean are you talking depression? Or mental and / or physical exhaustion?

I went thru a period of absolute mental (stress) and subsequent physical exhaustion (crash). In my case it was adrenal fatigue (Addisons: like Kennedy had). It is NOT fun - and for me it was so bad that I was a hair from checking out.

PM me if you think this is something other than simple doldrums and you want info.

[Writer]

27. Depression is always present. But I treat myself for that.

It's not physical. It's just a sensation that I don't want to put in an effort anymore. If I had a name for it, it would be "What's the point?" Disease.

I'm sorry to hear about your fatigue, but I gather that it's better now?

[Amerigo Vespucci]

21. The last two days, yes...

...I had to go to both of my banks and negotiate short-term concessions for my business. To each bank's credit, they worked with me and went well above and beyond the call of duty, but the first bank took three hours of my time (including a trip home to retrieve my business license, which they needed to see), and the second one took six hours (but it was well worth every minute).

I did this in support of my business, and it was necessary, but at the end of each of these sessions, I felt like I wanted to just find somewhere to fall down. I was mentally and physically exhausted (because the bank has every right to say "no"...the second bank actually did, that's why it took six hours. I had a guy in the Brea office who went to bat for me and I thanked him profusely. I also plan to see if there's any way I can send a letter of recognition to his supervisor, because this stuff DOES go into an employee's file, and it DOES get pulled out and scrutinized at review time. As a former H.R. manager (and manager of employees in general), it's the gospel truth. Customer thank-you letters addressed to supervisors are pure GOLD.

:toast:

[Writer]

29. Wow. It looks like you had quite a haul there with your business.

But I'm glad it all worked out!

[Amerigo Vespucci]

36. Thanks...we discover our level of committment in times of upheaval.

I actually owe the success of the last two days to sales guru Brian Tracy and his book. "Crunch Point"...he talks about a time in his business in which he did exactly what I did in the last two days. His point was that if you go to your bank(s) ahead of time and ask them for "breathing room," they will give it to you. If you wait until you're late, you're late, and you're hosed, and you're irresponsible, and the banks...well within their rights...will deal with you accordingly. I went early. I stepped up, I asked, I received. Some people have a hard time doing that because of pride. I remind myself that "pride" is one of the "seven deadly sins."

:evilgrin:

I've worked hard for my business. I know there's a tendency to paint banks as "the bad guys"...especially in light of the recent bailouts...but they really aren't. You can't walk in and expect them to honor your every wish in five minutes, without giving them a reason to do so...but I honestly believe that they will always respect and work with a responsible adult with a proven track record of keeping his / her commitments.

:toast:

[Writer]

38. What kind of business it it?

[Amerigo Vespucci]

42. Strategic Marketing: Web Site Design, Digital Photography, Desktop Publishing...

...and in tough times (like right now), the first thing companies cut back on is marketing.

I created three Web Sites for dentists, and have a major sales push on right now with dentists. I am working in concentric circles from my home, using the California Dental Association Web Site and Manta.com to compile my lists.

There was a survey completed in November 2008 in which seventy one percent of the dentists surveyed said that they wanted new patients.

One of the sites I created resulted in a call from a prospective patient, on the day the site was launched, who wanted "veneers" (what used to be called "caps")...

He actually paid for the procedure, which means my client received a 200% return on his investment within 24 hours of my delivering the completed site.

Yes, I am most certainly using that in my sales approach. But there is an extremely unfortunate segment of the population that feels the best strategy is to act like a turtle, to pull into their shell, and "hide" until the big, bad recession is over.

These folks will be extremely lucky if they survive. The businesses which continue to market themselves in the "worst" or times will emerge as the strongest in the "best" of times.

But therein lies the challenge of my marketing my own business to potential clients. Some get it. Others say "no thanks, I think I'll hide."

The single most sobering experience of my career as a business owner (2001-present) occurred when I walked down Campbell Avenue (Campbell, CA) a few years ago.

There was a business called "The Golden Frog." The woman who owned it, believe it or not, was really CAROLYN FROG.

:-)

She sold trinket kind of stuff, lawn gnomes and things you;d hang around your house, 100% non-essential and non-survival items.

She didn't have a Web Site. Campbell Ave is really a trendy, fickle, flavor-of-the-month street. People who aren't into yuppies with disposable income should never venture onto Campbell Ave.

But Carolyn never succeeded in pleading her case, in claiming her share. That's what strategic marketing accomplishes. "Build it an they will come" is a movie LIE from "Field of Dreams." Adults have to work...no, FIGHT...for their market share.

So one day I was walking down Campbell Ave, past The Golden Frog, and there's a huge "GOING OUT OF BUSINESS SALE" banner over the front door.

And inside the store, behind the front counter, on a stool, sat Carolyn...waiting for customers who were not coming.

It was one of the single saddest moments of my life. Could I have helped her? Maybe. I'll never know, because I never walked in and struck up a conversation.

I know a guy right now who has a pizza parlor...he makes REAL Italian pizza, DELICIOUS...and he's buried in a strip mall. He spends $400 a month on "Penny Saver," the newspaper that shows up in the mail and ends up in the trash (unread) of most residents in the area.

He's SEEN my sites. He KNOWS that new, LOYAL, ONGOING customers show up at my restaurants because I seduce them into submission and make them so damned hungry their only possible response is "WHERE ARE THE DAMNED CAR KEYS?"

But he is AFRAID (thank you, George W. Bush).

He's spending $400 a month on something that's not bringing in new business but is AFRAID to stop spending it for a few months and pay me instead, even though I have a proven track record and testimonials.

I have a client two doors down from him in the mall. A week after I built their site, someone in Los Angeles...500 miles away...called and bought TWO water purification systems from them (150% of what I charged to build their site).

It's like Arnold Schwarzenegger in "Terminator 2," when he says "Do you want to live? Come with me."

He's not opening up the floor to debate. He's opening up a window of opportunity which will slam shut in about ten seconds.

That's the nature of my business. I'd love to help people who don't want to help themselves, but that would only end up in our living under the same overpass.

Like I said earlier, "THANK YOU, GEORGE W. BUSH"...

:grr:

[Taverner]

25. Dude - that's the human condition

Take a stroll in a museum other than one that pertains to anything you've ever studied.

That will solve that!

[Writer]

30. I'm far away from any museums. Hehe.

But if this is the human condition, I will argue that this is the human condition during modernity.

I don't think our bodies are made to cope with the many stresses and mental/emotional challenges that we endure today. I'm only 33, but I feel like I've lived a lifetime. I no longer have the fight in me.

[Taverner]

34. According to most of our previous biology, you and I are supposed to be dead now

But we aren't

And that's a good thing

Our problem now is to decide what to do with all these people

[Writer]

37. There does seem to be a few too many people, doesn't it?

That's an interesting point: Just one-hundred years ago the oldest of us lived to no older than 50 or so, on average.

Now the average life-range in the US is nearing 80?

See - you might be onto something. We're supposed to be dead, but because we're not our minds are telling us "WTF, Dude?"

Sure it's great that we're living longer, but at what cost?

[Taverner]

39. Well I do like living this long

I say we find a way to make it work for everyone

[Writer]

41. I'm ready to go now.

I don't mean suicide, but I have had enough of this life. I want to go to sleep forever. I just don't know how much more kick I have. The fight is gone.

But I'm still working on all of this school work - it's like there's a voice hidden within the deep recesses of my mind that's telling me: "Hey, you know, it just might work out this time."

The rest of my mind suffers, however. It doesn't want to move on. It's tired and lazy.


Soooo... anyway...

[LynzM]

43. Um.....

Yep. My job often feels like that, that there is no "noble goal" behind what I'm doing, just supporting an industry that I don't really like. But hey, the people are nice and they like me and it pays ok...

[Guava Jelly]

44. yep

:hug::pals:

[Runcible Spoon]

45. Yep, last 2 weeks of my MA program...

working furiously to get PhD program apps in AND finish papers/projects up. I would rather file taxes naked during a root canal without novocaine while listening to Toby Keith than got through that again.

[mwooldri]

46. Right now I could do with a mental health vacation.

I'm one of the lucky ones... they announced layoffs of 5% of our department today but my sub-departments' getting ramped up instead. While some people will be speaking "severance", my vocabulary will include "mandatory overtime".

I haven't had a decent break since August. The "no longer feel the drive to work" for me right now is a "I don't want to actually physically get in the car and drive to work". I've never felt that my work isn't worthwhile... me in the right spirits and moods and I can nearly inspire anyone to learn new stuff (I'm on assignment as a call center coach right now). I can do the work, I can do it well, and at the right time, I want to put my all into it.

But I need a break.

Mark.

[redqueen]

47. Not to that point, no.

I've felt mental exhaustion that made me not want to do anything at all... but I still had the drive to work, because that's the only way to pay the bills. I was ready to let everything else slide though.