The official plural for Jesus.

[DarkPhenyx]

By consent of committee t'other day on DU, and because I say so damnit, the official pluralization for Jesus was decided upon.

It is now...

Jehosephats

Be sure to use this whenever applicable.

[joeybee12]

1. Well, I'm still using Jesi!!!!

What about the plural of Virgin Mary? Or Holy Ghost?

[kanrok]

2. Geez...that's not offensive to Christians

And you know there are Christians who post here. This really is no different than a Freeper posting "funny" names for Mohammad on their hateful site.

[DarkPhenyx]

5. Oh, Jesus is still Jesus.

But if you have more than one in a room, such as at a convention, what are you going to call them? You could go with "Your Lords Jesus" but that is just so formal. Christ always seeme dmuch more down to earth than that.

[pauldevon]

24. This makes me wonder if I am welcome here.

Was that a friendly jest or what?

[DarkPhenyx]

31. Which part?

My comment or the reply to it?

[I AM SPARTACUS]

3. as in..."Jumping Jehosephats..."

...Batman!"

[VelmaD]

4. You are a nut

And I'm glad to see you're still here this morning.

I will try to work Jehosaphats into my daily conversation from now on. :-)

[DarkPhenyx]

6. Yeah, apparently they decided not to ban me last night.

Or they haven't gotten around to it yet.

[VelmaD]

12. I slipped Skinner a twenty...

and flashed my boobs at him...must have worked. ;)

[Dogmudgeon]

7. Nope!

Jehosephat is an entirely different biblical character.

The proper plural is Jesi.

That makes the ergative plural Jessica.

--bkl

[DarkPhenyx]

11. We thought maybe Jesani

but that was voted down in commitiee. I can't help it if you missed a meeting. Next time read teh memos. ;-)

[NoPasaran]

8. I protest

If Jehosaphats is the plural of Jesus

Then what is the singular of Jehosaphat?

[DarkPhenyx]

9. Jehova.

Which nicely closes the loop of the Son being the Father. Jesus is God in mortal form. I knew we could make this work.

[Robb]

10. I applaud your

savior faire. :crazy:

[Limbought]

18. LOL

Now, that was funny!

[DarkPhenyx]

19. Oh Christ!

I just got that one. *C* That's waht I get for not reading closer.

[VelmaD]

22. You're just so used to your own bad spelling...

:P

[Rowdyboy]

13. As they clearly point out in "Steel Magnolias" the plural of Jesus is

"Jesi". Who better would know than southern women?

[DarkPhenyx]

14. Someone working in a Psych Hospital.

Think about it. I'll wait.

[VelmaD]

15. You owe the State of Texas a new keyboard...

cause I just snorted all over mine.

[shimmergal]

16. No, no. There's only one Jesus.

Unless you're talking about, say, a schoolroom with several Hispanic boys whose given names are Jesus. (That's pronounced differently though unless it's Anglicized.)

However, there may be several Christs. I've got a partly written SF story where the adherents also worship Elvis Christ.

If I had to pluracize the name, I'd say "Jesuses", just for ease of understanding.

Interesting thread, to say the least.

[Robb]

17. This seems like the place for my Jesus story

A group of Mexican construction guys I've known for a bit were working on one of the commercial buildings in town. One of them, named Jesus, has a three-year-old boy named Ignacio (or "Nacho", as everyone seems to call him).

So Jesus was working on the roof, and Nacho was talking to Mrs. Robb and I (the kid is cute beyond belief), when his dad calls him: "Hey, Nacho! ...Nacho!"

Nacho looks around, and can't see anyone. "Who is that?" he asks us.

"That's Jesus," said Mrs. Robb. "Up there." And she points upwards.

Nacho's eyes get HUUUUUUUGE, and he looks frightened. "J-j-jesus?!?" he stutters.

Everyone laughs, because of course he knows the man as "Papa". He thought he was having a divine moment! :D

[DarkPhenyx]

20. "Jesus is watching you"

heard the burglar as he was coming in teh window. He stopped, but didn't hear anything more and strarted coming through again. Just as he got completely in he heard again "Jesus is watching you."

He quickly snapped on his flashlight and lookied around the room and seeing a parrot in a cage he asked "is that you telling me Jesus is watching me?"

"Yes," said the parrot.

"Pretty clever. What's your name?"

"Larry"

"What kind of idiot names a parrot Larry?"

"The same one that named the pitbull Jesus."

[StlMo]

21. He He

:D

[Forkboy]

23. I thought it was a gaggle of Jesuses

:)

[Snow]

25. Oh come on, now...where're the biblical scholars and the aramaic

language scholars - this is DU, I know you're out there. "Jesus" (and "christ", for that matter) are Greek language. Jesus' buds called him Yeshua - likely Yeshua bin Miriam.

[TrogL]

26. There is one God

the concept of a plural for "Jesus" is meaningless.

If you mean multiple Hispanic guys by the same name - it's "Jesus's".

[Rowdyboy]

27. Of course Jesus can be plural..If you collect infants from various

manger scenes, you have a collection of baby Jesii.

[jesus]

28. Do I need to settle this?

[ironflange]

29. Welcome to DU, jesus!!!

:toast: :toast: :toast:

[jesus]

30. Thanks...

Been here a while. Like to just sit and watch.

[DarkPhenyx]

32. Your apostle "long" Rufus said that about you.

Always sitting back and just watching folks. That smile on your face.

Also says you still owe him $20.

[jesus]

33. Please...

Don't confuse me with Jimmy Swaggart.

[DarkPhenyx]

35. Jimmy will be the first one against the wall...

...when you finally do come back.

[Dogmudgeon]

34. Hey, Jesus ...

Could I ask you a few favors, buddy?

Could you cure my colitis? Help me lose weight? Get me an excellent job? With benefits?

Oh, yeah, I'd like to get laid, too.

Thanks in advance,

--bkl
Prostate at Thine feet.

[jesus]

36. Let's see...

"Could you cure my colitis?"

If you're a guy with a colitis, you need more help than I can provide.



"Help me lose weight?

You're ok with me.


"Get me an excellent job? With benefits?"

What would I know. I got my job thru nepotism.



Oh, yeah, I'd like to get laid, too.

That you have to get on your own. I'd stay away from the 25 cent tacos, but that's just me.

[Dogmudgeon]

37. Verily, He is the Chosen One!

Hosanna, dude!

And from now on, no more Taco Bell -- it's Quiznos for this believer!

--bkl