Does my story belong in Ladies Home Journal 'Can This Marriage be Saved'?

[Debi]

Exhibit A - photo of my 'damaged' property :cry:




Mr. Debi arrived at his office after going to court and preceeded to take his jacket off. He 'accidentally' knocked my beloved flamingo off of my desk onto the carpeted floor. The flamingo's neck somehow BROKE.

He swears he didn't mean to do it. I told him that I KNEW he was JEALOUS of my flamingo and he said that it was "...the ugliest flamingo he'd ever seen." When I asked him to get some glue he told me we were all out of glue. I know he used all the glue on purpose. I left him there holding the broken flamingo in his hands while I yelled out, "NOT A FINGER!"



Well....can this marriage be saved???

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVOOjV_E3s4

[trof]

1. NO! Those are grounds. File.

;-)

[Debi]

3. DAMN...I knew it!

I love him so much...he's a GOOD MAN. But his destroying my flamingo is the LAST STRAW!!!

[MrCoffee]

2. If Mr. Debi needs even marginally competent counsel, tell him to call me.

We're taking you to the cleaners.

[Debi]

4. Why don't you take me to the hardware store

and buy me some damn glue!! :grr:

(I'll let him know he has friends)

[MrCoffee]

5. The hardware store is out of glue

I've got some old chewed-up gum around here somewhere that's probably got some stick left in it.

[Debi]

6. YOU

need paying clients! ;)

[MrCoffee]

8. I'd be happy to represent you...we'll take him to the cleaners.

[Debi]

9. I only have one item of value

but it's a little BROKEN right now....

[Bake]

24. I'm available to assist as well.

Flamingo, my ass!

Bake

[azmouse]

7. I'll bet the whole neighborhood admired that flamingo when it was in the window too.

Was it a major award?

[Debi]

10. Yes - but he made me turn out the lights in the evening

'to conserve energy' :eyes:

[EastTennesseeDem]

11. Just take it like the Old Man

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVOOjV_E3s4

[Debi]

12. Uh..I linked that in my OP

:crazy:

[lizziegrace]

13. Hehe...

:rofl:

[Debi]

14. You laugh?

After the 'broken eggs' incident of this morning I cannot believe I'm now dealing with a 'broken flamingo' :cry:

He just told me he won't miss the damn thing. He has no feelings...*sob*

[lizziegrace]

16. I'm at a loss for words

I hope tomorrow is better for you, my friend. :hug:

[Gormy Cuss]

15. Mr. Debi needs to get out more.

That's far from the ugliest flamingo that I've ever seen. In fact, it's rather cute.

[Debi]

18. NOW it's ugly

b/c it HAS NO HEAD!!

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

17. Was the flamingo a major award?

[Debi]

19. Ha ha

in a sense - it was a gift. He's always been jealous of it. Watch out H - as they get older those codgers get feisty!

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

20. Believe me, LiV is already really fiesty

"Your fucking cat stole my chicken! Now I will starve to death!"

[Debi]

22. Old people worry about food all the time

that and the thermostat :crazy:

[LostinVA]

30. STFU

I did make her turn off the pellet stoive this morning since it's over 55 here today. She burns through pellets like they're cell phone minutes. Those wood pellets don't grow on trees, you know!

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

31. They're made of FUCKING TREES, GEEZER

[LostinVA]

32. Not in MY day, missy!

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

33. Where did you get your wood from?

Your BIL?

[Debi]

38. Honey, don't confuse her

You know how she gets. ;)

[Debi]

34. Put your teeth in....

you mumble w/out them. :rofl:

[rurallib]

21. in fairness you should get to break his neck

then see if he can't find the glue!
And I would say save the marriage. It would keep you two from ruining other lives. (ouch!!! Debi it was a joke, a joke, Debi)

[Debi]

25. Nice one!

But true - I wouldn't want him to terrorize any other woman's valuable heirlooms!

[AlCzervik]

23. you should put the head on his pillow and send him a message.

[Debi]

26. Oooohhhhh

We just watched The Godfather Sunday night :scared:

[WinkyDink]

27. Hmmm....male envy of the phallic symbol prominently displayed.....

[Debi]

35. *cough* *cough*

Not a concern :evilgrin:

[SacredCow]

28. What about "eye for an eye" justice?

Is there something of his that you'd really like to break?

:hide:

[Debi]

36. Hmmmmmmm

See post #27 :wow:

[SacredCow]

40. Ummmmmm..... That seems a little excessive!

:scared:

[Shell Beau]

29. Divorce is imminent!

:P

[Debi]

37. Thank you for understanding my pain

:hug:

[Callalily]

39. With extensive counseling

on Mr. Debi's part, coupled with your boundless compassionate heart, I think there is a chance, slight, but a change that your marriage can be saved.

Wishing you both the best of luck. ;)

And just wondering . . . haven't you dialed 911 yet for that fabulous flamingo? ;)

[Debi]

41. Is there 'Jealous of a flamingo' Counseling available?

I didn't call 911 b/c it was obvious the flamingo was dead. No reason to try to save it. However, now that you mention it, maybe it's time to get the authorities involved. :P

[SacredCow]

42. Be sure to post the mug shot when you have it!

:p