I'm about to get arrested.

[LeftyFingerPop]

Cop is standing behind me.

Wants to arrest me for sitting while intoxicated.

Gettin' like the fucking Gestapo around here.

[NYC_SKP]

1. Keep your cool, be nice, offer to go away, pretend you respect them...

arguing, especially if your high, leads nowhere.

most don't really want to take people in and do paperwork.

[LeftyFingerPop]

2. Yeah, BUT HE'S IN MY HOUSE!

[Dystopian]

7. Quick!

Call 911!!!:scared:

peace~

[LeftyFingerPop]

8. I tried, but there is no "11" on my phone.

[Dystopian]

9. OMG!

:rofl:
You're killing me...it's a very slow death...

peace~

[merh]

3. Okay - are you in your house, on your computer

or did you mistake the cops house for your house and his computer for your computer?

If so, you are facing more than just sitting while intoxicated. x(

:shrug:

[LeftyFingerPop]

5. I have no idea where I am more than half of the time.

It's better that way.

[merh]

10. well, I can agree, sorta

but if you are in the cops house, sitting and posting under the influence, then you would be better off knowing where you are at this point in time before the cop had to tell you by slapping the metal bracelets on your wrists and slamming your head into the car door/frame.

[LeftyFingerPop]

11. Cops stay away from me.

It's my breath.

My breath smells like month old monkey stew.

They hate it.

[bluesbassman]

4. You have a resident bartender at your house?

You're paying him, so why should he care if you throw ice cubes at him?

[LeftyFingerPop]

6. I hit him in the eye...

He's not happy.

Guy can't take a joke.

[NYC_SKP]

12. Nothin' else is working, so show him your porn collection.

Always worked for me...