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You charge for the meal and beverages (usually about $5, but you could do more.) and also set up a collection bucket. (Low cost, high payout. High time commitment, but most of which is social time spent talking to and thanking people.)A lot of times the Men's club (or the Elks, Masons, Odd-fellows, etc.) will donate the space if you tell them that's what you're using it for or if you (or someone you know well enough to ask them to make the approach for you) is a member.
I've seen all sorts, but pasta seems to work best because it's easy to cook in huge quantities, cheap and almost universally-loved. I mean who doesn't love a home-cooked spaghetti and meatball dinner? (Know your community. If chili or a fish fry or tamales would work better for your town, go with that.) You can buy huge bags of meatballs at Costco fairly cheap or call your local restaurant supply out of the Yellow pages. Someone you know has got to have a 20-gallon saucepan, better if you can find two...you can cook 30-40lbs of pasta at a time and just let the sauce simmer for hours.
Advertise by word of mouth, hang flyers on community boards (supermarket, local apartment complexes, Starbucks(ask the management first, I never said no and neither did my store manager when I was just a barista)), call the local newspaper (ours ran these sorts of stories all the time and gives free ad-space to fundraising events.), ask the venue host to talk it up to their members, sometimes the local media will throw you a free plug.
Another idea that I've seen work is something my college roommate throws yearly to support a friend who was paralyzed called a "Beef and Beer". Same idea, except you serve roast beef, mashed potatoes, veggies and beer. You can charge more for that...$20-$30, but it's harder to pull off because you need to obtain a permit for the distribution of beer and the person serving has to go to a class usually...you'd have to call your local officials to get specifics for your jurisdiction.
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