Funniest Read EVER!! Review for Wolves T-Shirt on Amazon (you'll think you're at Free Republic)

[LynneSin]

I'm really hoping some of these are goofs but this whole page is a riot. Look at the "Customers Who Viewed This Item Also Viewed" section - items included are Zubaz pants, Joe the Plumber's book and 'How to Live with a Huge Penis: Advice, Meditations, and Wisdom for Men Who Have Too Much (Paperback)' But the beauty are the reader reviews of this shirt. Sounds like something straight out of free republic

http://www.amazon.com/The-Mountain-Three-Wolf-T-Shirt/dp/B000NZW3KM/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=apparel&qid=1242826128&sr=8-1



This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that's when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to 'howl at the moon' from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn't have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.

I arrived at Wal-mart, mounted my courtesy-scooter (walking is such a drag!) sitting side saddle so that my wolves would show. While I was browsing tube socks, I could hear aroused asthmatic breathing behind me. I turned around to see a slightly sweaty dream in sweatpants and flip-flops standing there. She told me she liked the wolves on my shirt, I told her I wanted to howl at her moon. She offered me a swig from her mountain dew, and I drove my scooter, with her shuffling along side out the door and into the rest of our lives. Thank you wolf shirt.

Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the 'guns'), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.

>>>>>snip<<<<<<

Another Review:

This tee-shirt is a pitbull on the pantleg of opportunity.

I know that the human being and the fish can coexist. Why not the human and the wolf tee-shirt?

Rarely is the question asked: is our children wearing the wolf tee-shirt?

Will the highways of the Internet become more few? They will! Unless you get this tee-shirt.

This wolf tee-shirt is where our nation finds hope, where our wings take dream.

I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe -- I believe what I believe is right. And wearing this tee-shirt is right.

I wish you'd have given me this tee-shirt ahead of time so I could plan for it...I'm sure something will pop into my head here in the midst of this press conference, with all the pressure of trying to come up with answer, but it hadn't yet....I don't want to sound like I have made no mistakes. I'm confident I have. I just haven't -- you just put me under the spot here, and maybe I'm not as quick on my feet as I should be in coming up with one. SAY!!! Is that one of wolf tee-shirts?

There's an old saying in Tennessee -- I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee -- that says, fool me once, shame on -- shame on you. Fool me -- you can't get fooled again.

Don't be a fool! Get this shirt.

[datasuspect]

1. what y'all metrosexuals dont seem to grasp

is that we small town folk outnumber y'all and we live near walmart. and walmart gots guns and ammo.'

how many walmarts they got in NEW YORK CITY??!?!?!?!

shoot, i bet it's illegal for y'all to even own a gun there.

[LynneSin]

2. Is that a review or your own personal opinion

:scared:

[datasuspect]

3. baby, i got a personal opinion in my pants

[LynneSin]

4. Oh my - I can sense the spirit of the Three Wolves Howling at the Moon in your post

and it compels me to want to reach out and touch you!

:eyes:

[datasuspect]

5. hop in the truck darlin, we's goin to walmart!

[LynneSin]

6. I could use a new pair of polyester pants from the Kathie Lee Gifford collection

:eyes:

[datasuspect]

7. what kind of beer/cigarettes should i bring?

[LynneSin]

10. If you have to ask you're probably not someone who should wear the three wolves

:eyes:

[Tommy_Carcetti]

8. You better watch out. The three wolves t-shirt will become the next fashion fad.

Bank on it.

[peekaloo]

9. bwah.

chick magnet

he's a mountin' wolf